


This Time Around

by JustBecause86



Series: This Time Around [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: AU, Domestic Fluff, Don’t copy to another site, Eventual Relationships, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-08-14
Packaged: 2020-02-15 19:47:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 53,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18676261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustBecause86/pseuds/JustBecause86
Summary: Octavia and Raven were kind of friends in high school but now six years later Octavia comes back to town, now with a two year old daughter. Raven does the only thing she can think of and offers the girl she crushed hard on in high school to be her roommate. Little does she know that Octavia had a crush on her in high school.Slowish burn AU. Basically a lot of domestic fluff but eventually they'll figure it out. Background Clarke and Lexa eventually. Sorry, I suck at summarizing my stuff. Going to be a multi-chapter thing, so I'm open to all kinds of feedback and ideas.





	1. Day One

It was a day just like any other and as Raven stepped in to the small coffee shop just outside of campus she breathes in the warm smell of fresh brewed coffee. She stepped up to the counter and with a smile orders her usually. The girl behind the counter smiles at her as she puts the cup down on the counter, but Raven doesn’t pay her much attention, already three chapters in to her textbook.

She’d only graduated two years ago but had decided she wanted to return to school and get her master’s degree in Engineering. This meant she was working full time and trying for a rather difficult program all at the same time. Luckily for her though, she had managed to find a job working at her best friend’s mother’s company.

At first, she had nearly turned down the job, certain that the only reason she was getting the job was because of her friendship with Lexa but her mother had convinced her otherwise and she couldn’t be happier that she had taken the job.

She finds her way to her normal corner table and settles in to finish her drink and continue reading, hoping to get a jump start on the semester that starts in a week.

She’s part way though her fourth chapter when she hears the little chime indicating the front door has opened and she looks up out of habit. She nearly drops her coffee, which she had just taken a sip out of, when she sees who comes walking in.

Octavia Blake had easily been the most beautiful girl in high school, Raven hated to admit it but she had the biggest crush on her back then. Six years later and it seemed not much had changed. The girl could have been a goddess with her smooth bronze skin and jet black hair that shines when the light hit it.

_I swear she looks even better than she did in high school._

Raven doesn’t realize that she’s starting until Octavia looks in her direction and makes eye contact, Raven quickly diverting her eyes back to her textbook. She wasn’t sure if Octavia had noticed her until she hears a voice from next to her.

“Raven Reyes,” Octavia says, and Raven looks up to see the other woman smiling down at her.

“Octavia Blake,” Raven smiles back a bit nervously.

“How long has it been?” Octavia asks with a small tilt of her head.

“Not since high school,” Raven answers gesturing to the seat across from her, “Want to sit?”

“I’d love to,” Octavia says as she sits, surprising Raven. “So, how have you been since high school?”

“Um, good,” Raven answers, not having expected this conversation, “Finished the first round of college two years ago. Getting ready for round two,” she says holding up her textbook.

“Oh wow, so you’re still a super genius,” Octavia says reading the cover of the textbook.

“I wouldn’t say genius,” Raven counters with a chuckle. “I got an offer to come back so I figured I should take it while it was there. How about you?” Raven asks.

“Well, Lincoln and I got married about three months after we graduated high school,” Octavia says with a sad smile.

“Lincoln enlisted in the army before we graduated didn’t he?” Raven asks and feels bad when she sees the tears glistening in Octavia’s eyes.

“He did,” Octavia nods her head. “He was killed in Iraq two years ago.”

“O, I’m so sorry,” Raven says, reaching across the table and taking the girl’s hand without thinking about it. “I had no idea.”

“It’s alright,” Octavia says, wiping her eyes with her free hand, “Pretty much no one here does. I just moved back in to town a few days ago. Staying with mom until I can find a place.”

“I have a two bedroom apartment,” Raven says, withdrawing her hand, “and I’ve been considering getting a roommate to help split the costs.”

“Really?” Octavia asks, eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

“Yea,” Raven shrugs, “I mean, it’s nothing fancy. Two bedrooms, a living room, kitchen and one bathroom so we’d have to share.”

“That would be incredible,” Octavia smiles even bigger than before. “My mom was worried about me finding a place on my own and now I can tell her I found a place with someone I know.”

“We weren’t exactly close friends in high school,” Raven admits with a shrug, “but as long as you haven’t turned in to an axe murder or something, I think we’re fine.”

“Nope,” Octavia says then turns serious, “There is something you should know though.” She pauses and pulls her phone out of her pocket, unlocking it and pulling up a picture of her and a little girl. The girl couldn’t be much over two and looks like a clone of Octavia, right down to the bright blue eyes.

“This is my daughter, Cassandra,” Octavia says, pride in her eyes. Raven looks at the picture for a moment longer, realization sinking in.

“Oh,” she says slowly, looking back up at the girl across from here. Worry and acceptance now cloud Octavia’s face, breaking Raven’s heart.

“That’ll certainly make things more interesting I guess,” Raven says with a sigh.

“Wait,” Octavia says, sounding more shocked than Raven had. “You’re still ok with this?”

“Yea, why not?” Raven shrugs as though it’s the most casual thing in the world to be deciding on.

“It’s just,” Octavia starts but stops when she feels a lump in her throat. “When most people hear about Cassie, they can’t wait to get away.”

“I mean, kids can be scary at times,” Raven shrugs, leaning forward on the table slightly, “One of the guys at work brought his kid in to the office one day, he was maybe three or four, the kid ran through the place screaming and knocking files off of everyone’s desks. He thought one of my schematics would make a good coloring board.”

“Oh my god,” Octavia covers her mouth to try and hide her smile. “How bad was it?”

“I’m still trying to recreate it properly,” Raven huffs but smiles.

“I can promise you that Cassie is nothing like that,” Octavia promises. “She’s actually extremely shy and pretty much won’t talk to anyone who isn’t me or my mom.”

“I already like the kid,” Raven nods her head. “Tell me more about her.”

“Really?” Octavia asks, still sounding surprised.

“Hey, I just volunteered to live with the kid,” Raven laughs, “I should probably learn a little more about her. You too for that matter.”

“Raven, we went to school together,” Octavia sighs.

“That was six years ago,” Raven laughs, “and, like I said, we weren’t exactly friends back then either.”

“True,” Octavia concedes.

So, they spend the next hour talking and getting caught up before Octavia glances down at her watch.

“Oh wow, I have to go,” she says seeming surprised at the time. “I’m sorry. I have to pick Cassie up from the babysitter.”

“No problem,” Raven says as she pulls a pen out of her pocket. She quickly writes something on a napkin and hands it to Octavia as they both stand up. “Here’s my number and address. Let me know when you want to come over and check the place out.”

Octavia takes the napkin and scans it quickly, “You’re not too far from here.”

“Nope, ten minute walk to campus,” Raven nods, “Wanted to stay close so I don’t have to worry about getting to class on time.”

“We could stop by tonight if that works for you,” Octavia offers. “If it’s too soon it can wait.”

“Sure,” Raven says as she tries to do a mental check of how clean the place is.

“It takes me about an hour to get to the sitters from here,” Octavia says, “Plus an hour to get back. So, sixish?”

“Perfect,” Raven smiles as they head out of the coffee shop and in to the parking lot. “I’ll see you then.”

**

Raven has spent the last hour and forty-five minutes doing what she remembers someone having called the ‘flight of the bumblebee’, also known as Raven flying around her apartment attempting to clean everything so that it appeared perfect before Octavia arrives.

She’s just finishing wiping down the kitchen counter when she hears a knock at the front door. She slides down the short hallway from the kitchen to the front door in her socks and flips the lock, opening the door to a nervous looking Octavia and an even more miniature version of her standing at the door.

“You’re early,” Raven says, hoping she doesn’t sound as out of breath to Octavia as she does to her own ears.

The nervous smile turns in to a frown and Octavia says, “We can come back another day if it’s too early. Traffic was a lot lighter than I thought it was going to be.”

“Easy,” Raven chuckles, holding her hands up to stop Octavia mid ramble. “It’s only like fifteen minutes, it’s fine. I was just cleaning up a little. You must be Cassie,” Raven says turning her attention to the little girl holding tightly to Octavia’s hand. Raven crouches down so that she’s able to talk to the girl directly. “I’m Raven,” she says with a smile.

“Hi Raven,” Cassie says in a whisper, “I’m Cassie.”

“It’s nice to meet you Cassie,” Raven says, “Would you like to come in?” The little girls nods and Raven stands up, looking to Octavia to gauge how well the greeting went. Judging by the smile on the other girl’s face it went well.

“Come on in,” Raven says pushing the door completely open for them. “I’ll give you the grand tour,” she adds with a smile.

“It’s ok sweetie,” Octavia says as she ushers the little girl through the door. Octavia slowly walks in to the apartment, closing the door behind them and Raven can’t help but smile at the sight of the two as Octavia kicks off her shoes and places them next to Raven’s own. Cassie mimicked her mother, placing her own shoes next to Octavia’s.

“You guys don’t have to do that,” Raven offered but was meant by a smile.

“It’s a good habit for her to have,” Octavia explains as she watched her daughter with a smile.

Raven watches as the little girl takes the time to make sure that all of their shoes are lined up together before she stands and takes her mother’s hand again.

“Ok,” Raven says, trying to contain her grin as she walks back in to the kitchen, “Here’s the kitchen. Nothing special, stove, oven combo, sink, counters. Your basic kitchen.”

From the kitchen they head in to the living room, where Raven’s TV sits, currently ruined off, and the worn out couch she had bought from the thrift store down the street. Lexa’s mother had wanted to buy her a new one for her first place, but Raven had refused.

Raven notices how big Cassie’s eyes get when they walk in to the room and she chuckle and asks, “Is she alright?”

“We’ve never had a TV that big before,” Octavia laughs, “not even close.”

“Mommy, can we watch Paw Patrol on that?” Cassie asks in an awed whisper.

“Paw patrol?” Raven asks looking to Octavia.

“It’s her favorite show right now,” Octavia explains.

“Ah,” Raven says then she squats down in front of Cassie, “If you and mommy decide to stay here you can watch Paw Patrol on that TV whenever mommy says you can.”

“Really?” Cassie asks, the sound of amazement in the tiny voice makes Raven smile again.

“Absolutely,” Raven clasps her hands together in front of her and asks the girl, “Would you like to see the room you and mommy would be in?”

The girl nods excitedly and Raven stands back up. She hadn’t realized how close she had come to Octavia until she stood up but now her and the other girl were almost face to face.

“Um sorry,” Raven says looking down at her feet and taking a step back. “The room is this way,” Raven says, clearing her throat and stepping around them.

Before she gets too far away Octavia reaches out and lays her hand on Raven’s arm, “It’s ok Raven. I really appreciate you letting us come over.”

“Yea, of course,” Raven says with a nod. She leads the way down the short hallway to where the bedrooms are. “The door to the left is my room, bathrooms in the middle and this would be your room,” Raven says as she opens the door to the right.

“Wow,” Octavia says, taking in the room before her. Raven had already cleared out the room, pushing the full sized bed to the far wall, near the window, with a dresser sitting next to it. The frame for a twin size bed sat along the wall by the door, a side rail lying next to it.

“I wasn’t able to pick the mattress up when I got the frame and dresser,” Raven explains, “It didn’t all fit in my friend’s truck. I’m going back tomorrow to pick it up.”

“You got us beds and a dresser?” Octavia asked sounding shocked.

“To be fair the full sized bed was already here,” Raven admits, “This was supposed to be my guest room, but I never invite anyone over, so it’s never been used.”

“You still went out and bought a dress and smaller bed?” Octavia asks looking at Raven with a raised eyebrow.

“I didn’t want you to have to worry about this kind of stuff if you decided you wanted to stay,” Raven shrugs again.

“What if I decided not to?” Octavia asks tilting her head to the side. Cassie had already let go of her mother’s hand and was playing with the nobs of the dresser?

“It didn’t cost that much,” Raven says smiling as she watches Cassie, “and if you don’t want to stay then I guess I’ll have motivation to start inviting people over.”

Octavia can’t stop the chuckle that bubbles out of her.

“Mommy,” Cassie, who has found her face to the larger bed, “Our bed?”

“I guess it is,” Octavia answers nodding her head. “Only this time Cassie will get her own bed.”

The little girl starts to clap her hands in response and Raven smiles again.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?” Raven asks then. “I didn’t have anything planned but we can figure something out if you’d like to stay.”

“Mac and cheese!” Cassie announces from across the room, throwing her hands up in the air in excitement.

“I think we can manage that,” Raven smiles at the little girl then looks to Octavia for approval. Octavia nods her head, returning the smile.

Cassie leads the way out of the room and heads back in to the living room.

“Do you want to watch TV while I work on food?” Raven asks Octavia.

“You know if you let her watch Paw Patrol on that thing,” Octavia says motioning to the TV, “she’s never going to want to leave.”

“Doesn’t sound like a problem to me,” Raven says with a smile as she grabs the remote off the coffee table and hands it to Octavia. “I have zero idea what channel you need.”

“Fair,” Octavia says as she takes the remote from Raven. She watches for a moment as Raven walks in to the kitchen then she turns the TV on and searches through the channels until she finds what she’s looking for. She picks Cassie up and sets her down on the couch. “Alright, sweet pea, you stay here and watch Paw Patrol, I’m going to go talk to my friend.”

“Ok, mommy,” Cassie says as she settles in to the arm of the couch.

Octavia walks to the doorway of the kitchen and leans against the wall, watching Raven as she sets about making dinner.

“You don’t have to do this, you know?” Octavia asks after a moment.

Raven jumps and turns around, a hand pressed to the center of her chest, “Jesus O, you scared the shit out of me.”

“Sorry,” Octavia says as she tries to keep the smile from her face.

“You look it,” Raven says smiling at the girl.

“I didn’t expect to see you jump like that,” Octavia admits with a chuckle, “It was kind of nice to know I can get through the tough girl act.”

“What act?” Raven asks, lifting an eyebrow, as she turns on stove on.

“I remember what you were like in high school,” Octavia says as she walks over and leans against the counter next to the stove, “You always had this tough girl look on your face., almost like you were daring someone to fuck with you.”

Raven chuckles and says, “I didn’t think you even noticed someone like me back then.”

“Someone like you?” Octavia asks. She wasn’t quite ready to admit that she had more than noticed Raven back then.

“Come on Octavia,” Raven says with a sigh, “You were easily the most popular girl in high school. Cheerleader, dating the captain of the football team, prom queen,” Raven says as she ticks things off on her fingers.

“I get it, I get it,” Octavia says waving Raven off before she can add anything else. “It wasn’t as glorious as you make it all sound.”

“I was just the orphaned loner that hid out in shop class to avoid everyone,” Raven shrugs. Octavia does remember having heard something about Raven’s parents dying when they had been in middle school, but she couldn’t remember the details of it now.

“Guess we don’t know much about each other,” Octavia says after a moment.

“Still want to move in?” Raven asks as she turns and leans against the front of the stove, so that she’s facing the same way as Octavia.

Octavia nods her head and says, “Yea, I think it would still be good.” She looks down and notices that their hands are less than an inch from each other and she bites her lower lip. “I mean, you did go out and buy a bed for Cassie,” she adds looks back up with a chuckle.

Raven shrugs as she turns back around to add the pasta to the boiling water.

“I know you shrug it off Raven but it’s a big deal for us,” Octavia says with a sigh.

“You said, ‘this time Cassie gets her own bed’,” Raven says as she stirs in the pasta.

“I was four months pregnant when Lincoln died,” Octavia says, taking a deep breath, “We were living on the east coast, just about as far away from home as we could be.”

“Doesn’t the military do anything to take care of you after, something like that?” Raven asks.

“They let us stay in base housing for a year after,” Octavia nods, “but then we had to leave, and it took most of the death benefits just to get us back out here. I had Cassie out there, by myself, and I couldn’t get a bigger place. We’ve shared a bed ever since then.”

“Is it ok that I got her a bed?” Raven asks, suddenly feeling unsure about her shopping trip earlier.

“Yea, I think she’ll be excited,” Octavia smiles, “It was really sweet of you to think about her.”

“I was just going on a hunch,” Raven says as she stirs the pasta lazily.

“You seem like you’ve been doing pretty good since high school,” Octavia says as she looks around the room.

“College was an experience,” Raven nods her head, “I roomed with Lexa for the whole thing. Only person I figured I could stand living with that long without killing.”

“Lexa Woods?” Octavia asks as she lifts herself up to sit on the counter.

“Yup,” Raven pops the p, “Her and I have been friends for a long time. I actually work for her mom’s company now.”

“Wow, that’s impressive,” Octavia says, “I remember how everyone was intimidated by her in high school because her mom was some super executive.”

“She runs one of the biggest engineering and architecture companies in the state,” Raven clarifies.

“Is that what you do?” Octavia asks.

“I got my degree in engineering,” Raven nods, “so right now I help out by taking the architect’s plan and make it practical.”

“That sounds…. complicated,” Octavia says after a pause.

“It can be,” Raven agrees with a smile. “But I actually really like it. I’m hoping that if I do well enough, and manage to get my master’s degree, that one day they’ll let me actually help design a building or two.”

“I can see it now,” Octavia smiles, “I’m going to be driving in to L.A. one day and there’s going to be your name plaster on the side of a building.”

Raven can’t help but laugh at that, “Not exactly how that works. They don’t typically put the engineer’s name on the side of the building. At most I’d get to put my name at the bottom of the blueprints for the thing.”

“Well, that’s pretty big too,” Octavia says still smiling.

“What about you?” Raven asks, “What have you been up to for the past six years. Other than the obvious,” Raven adds with a grin.

“Nothing as exciting as you,” Octavia shrugs and when Raven gives her a look she grins and says, “Seriously, Lincoln and I got married because he was leaving, and it was the only way I could go with him.” Octavia looks a little sad at the memory, “We ended up in New York for the first three years, then South Carolina. That was when Lincoln got deployed to Iraq.”

Raven quietly drains the water off the pasta as she listens to Octavia.

“I got my degree in Accounting while we were in New York,” Octavia adds after a moment. “Haven’t really gotten the chance to use it yet though.”

“Not a lot of need for accountants when you live on base huh?” Raven asks as she mixes in the cheese.

“Not really,” Octavia sighs, “I could have looked off base, but I had already started work on my master’s and with Lincoln’s pay we didn’t need much else. I had a job working on the post exchange and I was happy there.”

“So, you’ve only been back a few days?” Raven asks.

“Yea, we actually got back Friday,” Octavia nods, looking towards the living room, she can see Cassie on the couch from there.

“How’s living back with your mom?” Raven asks as a smile pulls at her lips.

Octavia laughs, “She hasn’t changed much. She’s driving me a bit crazy to be honest.”

“I can just imagine,” Raven chuckles, “I remember what she was like at your brother’s football games.”

“Oh my god,” Octavia laughs again, “She was literally that mom, custom jersey and all.”

“Well, you guys can move in whenever you want,” Raven says as gets three bowls out of the cupboard. “After tomorrow at three anyway, that’s when I can get the mattress for Cassie’s bad.”

“That’s fine,” Octavia shrugs, “I was planning on leaving Cassie with my mom tomorrow and spending the day job hunting.”

“You know, they’re always looking for financial people at our office,” Raven offers. “I can ask around tomorrow.”

“I haven’t even looked at my accounting stuff since Cassie was born,” Octavia shakes her head. “I don’t know that I’d be any good at it.”

“It’s just an idea,” Raven says as she scopes mac and cheese in to the three bowls. “I have zero idea if there’s any childcare there, but I can also ask about that too.”

“Thank you,” Octavia says as she slides down off the counter. She takes two of the bowls and sets them on the small table in the kitchen. “I’ll get the munchkin,” she says as she heads in to the living room.

Raven sets her bowl on the table and hears Cassie exclaim from the other room. Moments later the girl enters the kitchen holding her mother’s hand. She looks unsure until her eyes land on Raven and she smiles again.

Octavia picks Cassie up and sits down with the girl in her lap, “I’ll bring her booster seat next time we come over.”

“Guess I’m not used to having short people around,” Raven grins at Octavia, who is several inches shorter than her.

“Very funny Reyes,” Octavia playfully glares at her from across the table. “Just remember, great things come in small packages.”

“I’ll remind you of that when you’re asking me to get things off the high shelf later,” Raven laughs, earning her another glare from the girl across from her. This was certainly not how Raven had expected her day to end, and she was pretty sure that her life was about to change in a way she never could have imagined.


	2. Day Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raven has a conversation with her best friend and it's move in day!!

Raven lets out a huff as they let the mattress fall flat in the bed of the truck. It wasn’t heavy but she had forgotten how much of a pain in the ass mattresses could be to move on your own. Hence, why today she had drafted Lexa to help her out. Afterall, Lexa had let Raven borrow her truck the day before to get the first load of stuff so Raven didn’t really think her friend would turn her down now.

What she hadn’t been expecting is the inquisition she gets from her friend.

“So, let me see if I understand this right,” Lexa was saying as Raven sat on the tailgate of the truck. “Octavia Blake, the goddess from high school,” Lexa says causing Raven to roll her eyes, “shows up out of the blue, tells you her husband is dead and that she has a kid and your first reaction is to offer to let her move in with you?”

“More or less,” Raven says with a nod and a sigh.

“And you went out and bought furniture for said kid,” Lexa adds as she sits next to Raven.

“It seemed like the right thing to do,” Raven says with a shrug.

“You’ve got a big heart, I’ll give you that,” Lexa says with a nod. “Just remember, it’s been six years since you’ve seen this girl. Just because you had the biggest crush on her,’ Lexa starts and Raven silences her with a glare.

“I’ll remember that the day Clarke Griffin shows up on your doorstep,” Raven says earning her a glare in return. After a moment they both break out in to laughter.

“Holy shit,” Lexa says, as though something had just occurred to her, “That’s the reason you were asking around work today about openings in the financial department wasn’t it?”

“Jesus, can I do anything at work without you finding out about it?” Raven asks with a heavy sigh.

“Probably not,” Lexa shrugs, “Benefits of being the boss’s daughter,” she adds with a chuckle.

“You’re terrible,” Raven says but is all smiles, “and yes, I was asking around to see if I could help find her a job.”

“So, you offered to let her move in knowing she didn’t have a job yet?” Lexa asks curiously.

“She just got back in to town,” Raven explains.

“Oh, you’ve got it bad kid,” Lexa chuckles.

“You’re an ass,” Raven says as she gives Lexa a playful shove, “and we’re the same age by the way.”

“Alright, let’s get this thing over to your place so I can call it a day,” Lexa says as she hops of the back of the truck.

“Rough day sitting behind that desk of yours?” Raven teases as she follows Lexa and climbs in to the passenger seat of the truck.

“Cute,” Lexa says turning the truck on and putting it in to gear. “You know how mom gets.”

“She wants to make sure you have a career and don’t have to struggle like she did,” Raven reasons as they head down the road.

“God, you sound like her,” Lexa sighs, “and I know all that. She’s also worried about her company. Where it’s headed, who’s going to take over after she retires.”

“It’s hard to imagine your mother ever retiring,” Raven says from the passenger seat.

“No kidding,” Lexa chuckles shortly. “That’s all I can ever remember her doing.”

“Not easy building a company the way she did,” Raven tries to sound encouraging. “At least now you guys get to spend time together at work.”

“You really need to work on your motivational speeches,” Lexa chuckles with a glance to her friend. “Maybe living with a toddler will be good for you.”

“Gee, thanks,” Raven laughs as they pull in to the parking lot of her apartment building.

“You know kids don’t do well with sarcasm,” Lexa chuckles as they get out of the truck.

“You’re going to give me advice on living with children?” Raven asks skeptically as she lowers the tailgate on the truck.

“Not even,” Lexa chuckles as they start pulling the mattress off the truck. “Just a thought. I have interacted with a few children in my life.”

“It doesn’t count if you were a kid at the same time,” Raven argues as they head towards the stairs.

“Smartass,” Lexa huffs as they make their way up to Raven’s third floor apartment. “Why did you have to live on the top floor?”

“It’s the best,” Raven says with a smirk.

“Are you ever going to stop using that damn movie quote?” Lexa asks with a sigh.

“Not until you figure out what movie it’s from,” Raven laughs as they make it to the top of the stairs.

“You’re hopeless,” Lexa grunts as they reach Raven’s door. Raven carefully leans the top of the mattress against the wall and, with one hand fishes her keys out of her pocket. The door swings open and they make their way to what had been Raven’s guest bedroom.

“This is quite the set up Raven,” Lexa says after they had set the mattress on the foundation and she looked around the room. “How did you get that dresser up here yesterday?”

“I may have guilted the neighbor down the hall to help,” Raven answers.

“You do know that Finn is still hoping you’ll go out with him,” Lexa says with a shake of her head.

“I don’t know how much clearer I can be with him,” Raven sighs as she straightens the mattress and gives in an approving nod. “I flat out told him I’m in to girls.”

“Boys are dense,” Lexa laughs. “Maybe he’ll get the idea while you’re playing family.”

“Don’t be an ass,” Raven says. She jumps a little when she hears footsteps in the hallway.

“Hello,” she hears Octavia’s voice say and throws Lexa a warning look.

“We’re in here,” Raven calls and a moment later she sees Octavia step in to the doorway, Cassie in tow.

“Bad timing?” Octavia asks as she looks between Raven and Lexa and Raven has to wonder how much of their conversation she heard.

“Not at all,” Raven says with a quick shake of her head. “We were just finishing putting Cassie’s bed together,” she adds with a smile to the little girl.

“Look Cassie,” Octavia says looking down at the girl. “You get your own bed.”

“For me?” the little girl asks quietly.

“Yep,” Raven smiles as she crouches down in front of the girl. “It’s just for you.”

The girl smiles and Raven stands back up, “I just have to put the side rail on yet, but I thought it’d be easier to make the bed first.”

“Do you even have sheets for a bed that size?” Lexa speaks up.

“Eh, probably not,” Raven realizes then she says, “Octavia I’m sure you remember Lexa Woods.”

“How could I forget,” Octavia says as she releases Cassie’s hand and takes a step forward, offering Lexa’s her hand. “It’s been a while.”

“Octavia Blake,” Lexa says as she takes the offered hand and shakes it. “You know I don’t think there was a signal kid in high school that didn’t have a crush on you.” Lexa’s shoots a grin at Raven who’s looking at her like she could kill her.

“Thanks,” Octavia laughs, “It was a long time ago.”

“I see that,” Lexa says looking at Cassie. “How old is she?”

“Almost two,” Octavia answers looking back at the girl smiling.

“Anyway, Lexa,” Raven says throwing her friend another look, “Don’t you need to get going?”

Lexa chuckles but nods, “Yea, I actually should get going. It was nice to see you again Octavia.”

“You too,” Octavia smiles. “I have a feeling we interrupted something,” Octavia says to Raven after Lexa had closed the door behind her.

“You really didn’t,” Raven assures her. It’s only then that Raven realizes Octavia has a bag slung over her shoulder. “Did you bring some of your stuff with you?”

“I brought all of our stuff,” Octavia nods. “There’s two boxes in my car still.”

“That’s it?” Raven asks lifting an eyebrow. When she sees Octavia deflate slightly, she quickly adds, “Not that it’s a bad thing. Less is more, right?”

Octavia forces a small smile but nods her head, “It’s mostly Cassie’s stuff and my clothes, but it’s what we were able to bring with us. Kind of why it was a big deal about the furniture,” Octavia adds, letting the bag slid off her shoulder and hit the floor, “I was trying to work out how I could get some with what money I have right now.”

“That reminds me,” Raven says as she reaches in to the back pocket of her jeans and pulls out a business card, “This is the number for the guy in Human Resources. I talked to him today and he said if you give him a call tomorrow, he can set something up to at least get you an interview.”

“Raven,” Octavia says as she takes the card, “that’s incredible. You realize I spent most of the day out looking for jobs and the best I walked away with was a maybe from the guy at the coffee shop across town.”

“It’s just an interview,” Raven shrugs, “the hard parts on you.”

“Thank you Raven,” Octavia smiles then glances at Cassie, who is quietly sitting on the floor playing with two of her stuffed animals that Octavia had packed in the bag. “Could you watch her so I can get the boxes from the car?”

“Um, yea, sure,” Raven stumbles over her words. “I’ve never watched a kid before,” she admits.

“It’ll just be a few minutes, I promise,” Octavia says.

“I’m sure we’ll be fine,” Raven smiles back. Octavia gives a short nod then turns and leaves the room, a few seconds later Raven hears the front door open and close.

Raven lowers herself on to the floor next to the larger of the two beds and leans against it. It had been a long day at work and her leg was bothering her, so she stretches it out in front of her. Cassie notices her movements and stands up, takes a few little steps towards her but then stops and just watches Raven.

“Hi,” Raven says a bit nervously, “What’s up?” she asks, feeling stupid already.

The little girl titles her head, just like her mother, and points up at the ceiling fan above them.

“That’s fair,” Raven says smiling. “That wasn’t the smartest question.” She watches the girl for a second then sighs and says, “You know, I thought I was smart enough to go for my master’s degree yet, here I sit, having no idea how to talk to a two year old. How does that happen?” Raven makes a face at herself, which apparently Cassie finds funny because she starts to giggle.

“Right?” Raven says, as though the girl had just answered her first question. “It doesn’t make sense,” Raven chuckles. She’s startled a little when Cassie takes the few remaining steps between them and sits down next to Raven. She holds up her one stuffed animal to Raven and waits patiently until she reaches over and takes it.

“Who’s this?” Raven asks her, holding the toy. It was a grey and white dog that was wearing a green shirt and matching hat.

“Rocky,” Cassie answers with grin, then she holds up the toy she still has and says, “Chase.”

“Rocky and Chase,” Raven repeats the names out loud. Chase, who was also a dog, was clearly a German Shephard, and was wearing what looked like a blue police uniform. “Is Chase a police puppy?”

Cassie nods as she straightens Chase’s hat, which is clearly sewn on, and Raven holds up Rocky, “What does Rocky do?”

“Rocky makes old things new,” Cassie answers, nodding her head.

“Makes old things new,” Raven mumbles to herself trying to figure out exactly what that means.

“He recycles,” Octavia answers as she reenters the room, two small boxes stacked on top each other.

“Oh,” Raven says and goes to try and stand up only to have her leg cramp. She hisses a little in pain and slides back down. In a second Octavia is by her side, kneeling beside her.

“Raven,” Octavia says with just a trace of worry in her voice.

“It’s fine,” she says shaking her head, annoyed at herself. “My leg just gets sore sometimes.”

“Yea,” Raven nods once, “Long day.”

“You probably shouldn’t have been carrying mattresses then,” Octavia sighs.

“It probably had more to do with walking about twelve floors worth of steps today,” Raven chuckles. When Octavia gives her a look she explains, “I had a bunch of meetings with designers today and it was faster than waiting around for the elevator.”

“Well, how about you rest, and I’ll put stuff away and start figuring out dinner,” Octavia offers.

“You want me to just sit here while you do all the work?” Raven asks skeptically.

“No,” Octavia says, and a large smile grows on her face. She stands up and grabs the bag she had first arrived with. She drops it next to Raven and a few more small stuffed animal fall out, all of which are dogs. “You’ve already started learning about Paw Patrol, might as well have Cassie introduce you to the rest of them.”

“Serious?” Raven asks, with a raised eyebrow and chuckle, as she picks up a dog wearing a red shirt.

“Marshall,” Cassie exclaims as she claps her hands and reaches for the dog.

“A Dalmatian as a fire dog, how original,” Raven laughs lightly as she hands Cassie to toy. “Alright kid,” Raven sighs, picking up the next dog, “which one’s this?”

Octavia’s smile grows and she sets about unpacking the few things they had brought with them.

After almost an hour, and a rather in depth lesson on all of the toys in front of them, Octavia had finished putting things away and had even managed to find a way to make the sheet for a full sized bed work on Cassie’s twin.

“Not perfect but it’ll work,” Octavia announces, looking the bed over with a satisfied nod.

“Looks great,” Raven says from her place on the floor next to Cassie. Octavia has to suppress a laugh when she turns around and sees Raven’s lap covered with stuffed dogs, Cassie picking up one at a time and lining them up on the floor in front of them.

“You two look like you’re having fun,” Octavia says, a smile starting to break though.

“It’s been an educational hour,” Raven chuckles. “I’m just hoping there’s not a quiz after this.”

“Oh, you have no idea,” Octavia chuckles as she lays down on the floor in front of Cassie. “How we doing monkey?”

“Good,” the girl smiles as she takes another toy from Raven and places in next to the last one.

“Are you having fun playing with Raven?” Octavia asks the girl, tilting her head as she watches her daughter with a smile.

“I showed her my paw pup,” Cassie says nodding her head.

“I see that,” Octavia smiles and shifts her eyes to Raven for a moment. With how Octavia is laying on the floor her head is near Raven’s outstretched legs. “How about you put your paw pups on your new bed and then we’ll have dinner?”

“Raven too?” Cassie asks, looking to Raven as she hands her the last toy she had.

“Yep, Raven too,” Raven answers with a nod.

“Yay,” Cassie says with a smile as she starts gathering up the stuff animals she had lined up. She picks up Rocky and walks him over to her new bed. Raven had chosen to go with a foundation that placed the bed nearly on the floor, figuring it would work better for the little one. It also made it easier for when she got older to raise it as needed.

“She’s a really good kid,” Raven says as she watches Cassie put the first two ‘stuffies’ as she calls them, on her bed.

“She has her moments,” Octavia says, stretching her arms over her head. “Wait until she doesn’t get a nap someday,” Octavia adds with a sigh.

“Wait until you see me in the morning,” Raven counters back with a smile.

“I guess I will,” Octavia smiles back, and she rest her hand on Raven’s lower leg as she rolls part way over to see what Cassie is doing, being careful to avoid Raven’s knee.

Raven doesn’t realize she’s holding her breath until Cassie comes running back over for more toys and trips in to Raven’s side, startling her for a second. Raven’s arms automatically come out and catch the girl.

“Easy kiddo,” Raven says as she straightens the girl, who is now giggling.

“Where’s Chase?” Cassie says, looking at the toys in front of her.

“Right here,” Raven says handing her the toy in question and the girl runs off to place Chase on the bed with the other one. “She going to do this one at a time?” Raven looks down to Octavia who lifts an eyebrow playfully in response.

“Zuma,” Cassie announces when she appears next to Raven again and she hands her the pup wearing the orange shirt.

Octavia watches in amusement as Cassie walks the stuffie over to her bed and sits it next to the other two already there, then returns to Raven and in a cheery voice says, “Rubble!” To which Raven automatically picks up the right pup and hands it to the girl.

“Remember what you were saying about that quiz?” Octavia asks with a crocked grin.

“Oh,” Raven says as Octavia’s words sink in. “She’s good,” Raven chuckles.

“She’s either going to be a teacher or a politician, I swear,” Octavia chuckles, resting her head back more on Raven’s leg. “What are you thinking for dinner? I can make something this time.”

“Dinner, right,” Raven says as she blows out a deep breath. “I hadn’t given it any thought to be honest, and I probably need to do some grocery shopping.”

“Marshall,” Cassie says walking back in to the conversation and Raven shakes her head but hands over the stuffie.

“We can do that tomorrow if you want,” Octavia offers, “but for tonight how about I just order us something? It’s been a day I take it.”

Raven huffs out a short laugh, “You could say that.”

“What happened?” Octavia asks, lifting her head up on to her arm, while her elbow rest on the rest against Raven’s leg.

“I spent the entire day, six meetings, trying to convince the designer that, while I like his idea,” Raven says the last part with air quotes, making Octavia chuckle, “it’s not practical from an engineering standpoint.”

“Everest!” Cassie giggles as she Raven pulls her down in to her lap and tickles the girl.

“You little miss,” Raven laughs as the girl continues to squeal and wiggle, “You know, I don’t know that one.”

Octavia watches the pair until Raven sets the girl back on her feet and Cassie points to the right pup and Raven hands it to her. Raven looks back at Octavia with a quizzical look on her face.

“What?” she asks Octavia.

“I didn’t say anything,” Octavia says, shaking her head.

“No, but the look on your face did,” Raven counters.

“What did my face say?” Octavia challenges with a grin.

Raven shrugs but answers, “You had this daydreamy look on you face.”

“Oh, well,” Octavia stammers a little, “It’s just nice to see Cassie having fun. She usually doesn’t take to new people so well.”

“Ah,” Raven smiles as Cassie runs back over to her.

“Tracker,” Cassie smiles as Raven picks up the pup for her and runs off again.

“Considering my options now are a real dog and the robot one,” Raven says with a smile, “I don’t think I can screw this up.”

Octavia laughs when Cassie runs over and sits in Raven’s lap, instead of asking for another pup, the freaked out look on Raven’s face was too much for her not to laugh.

“What’s up monkey?” Octavia asks, reaching up and squeezing Cassie’s shoe.

“Can Raven and I play again?’ the little girl asks in a quiet voice. “After dinner?”

Octavia feels tears spring to her eyes, but she keeps them at bay, though she does find it difficult to swallow around the sudden lump in her throat.

“Guess what kiddo?” Raven asks and when Cassie looks up at her Raven looks at Octavia who nods for her to continue, “You and mommy are going to be living here now. That means you and me, can play together all the time.”

“Really?” Cassie asks, her eyes getting big in the way little ones do.

“Yup,” Raven says, popping the p. “Now, how about we get dinner?”  
**

A few hours later, after pizza and Raven’s first episode of Paw Patrol were over, and after Cassie had fallen asleep on Octavia and been carried to bed by her mother, Raven sat on the couch thinking about the day she’d just had.

It certain wasn’t one she had ever expected, the thought of ever having kids was never one she really had, and she thought about the drastic difference between her time at work that day and her time spent with Cassie and Octavia.

“Hey,” Octavia’s voice breaks in to Raven’s thoughts and she looks up to see the other girl, now dressed for bed, standing next to the couch. “Feel like company?

“Sure,” Raven says with a grin.

“You looked pretty deep in thought,” Octavia says as she takes a seat at the other end of the couch from her.

“Just trying to figure out how to find a common ground between the designers and reality,” Raven lies. It’s not an exact lie, that should be where her thoughts are.

“I’m sure you’ll find a way,” Octavia assures her as she rests her elbow on the arm of the couch and rest her head in her hand.

“I hope so,” Raven sighs.

Octavia tucks her feet beneath her and sighs before saying, “Thanks for playing with Cassie like that this afternoon. You didn’t have to.”

“It was actually fun,” Raven chuckles and adds, “Plus I did learn a lot.”

“Clearly,” Octavia smiles, “but I know that it can be a bit much, coming home from work, figuring out dinner and finding time for the kid. If you ever need a break just let me know. We can always spend some time at my mom’s or my friend’s.”

Raven’s first instinct is to say that it won’t ever be a problem, but she hesitates, gives herself a moment to think before answering. “I’ll make you a deal.”

Octavia lifts her eyebrow in question but waits quietly for the rest.

“If I ever start to feel like it’s too much, or whatever,” Raven says waving a hand in the air, “Then I’ll make plans and just stay out of the night or something.”

“Raven, this is your place,” Octavia starts to object but Raven stops her with another wave.

“It’s your place now too,” she says, “I wouldn’t put you two out just because I’m having a rough day. That’s just messed up.”

Octavia doesn’t answer at first, the lump of emotion in her throat from earlier making a reappearance but she does nod.

“Ok,” she says finally, “Sounds fair.”

“Good,” Raven says with a nod of her own. “So, do you think I passed Cassie test?” she asks with a chuckle.

Octavia couldn’t have stopped the laugh that bubbles out of her if she’s wanted to, “I don’t know, you did miss one.”

“Ouch,” Raven laughs, “that’s a tough grading scale there Blake.”

After their laughter subsides Octavia, wiping the tears she’s managed to laugh out off her face, sighs and says, “Yea, I think you passed.”

Raven throws her a sideways grin, nodding her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got this one done just now so I figured I'd post it. Going to be a long weekend so I probably won't get much done for a few days.


	3. Day Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning just for this chapter as there is a mention of death, both from illness and suicide.
> 
> This one took me a bit longer, it was a rough last couple few days and I wasn't able to write much. Hope you all like this chapter, I'm a little worried it's not exactly what I was going for but here it is.

Raven couldn’t be happier that it was Friday. Even with leaving work at three on Tuesday she’d still managed to work well over her forty hours this week, including working her usually day off, Thursday. Between spending half her time working on drawing up new, functional design plans and meeting with the designers to try and convince them of the middle ground, she was wiped.

The only bright side she found to her days was when she finally got home and found Octavia and Cassie there. Octavia was usually making something for dinner while Cassie played or listened to her mother read out loud to her.

That’s why, when Raven walks into the apartment that Friday evening, she’s surprised to find it quiet. She kicks her shoes off and walk in to the kitchen to find it empty, the living room the same. Figuring that Octavia must have gone to visit her mother, Raven decides to take a shower and try and wash away her long day.

She had just stepped out of the shower when she heard a noise out in the hallway. Wrapping a towel around herself she steps out in to living room and nearly runs straight in to Octavia.

“Holy crap,” Raven says, somehow managing to keep a firm grip on her towel, “I didn’t think you guys were here.”

“We just got home,” Octavia explains as her eyes travel over Raven, “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You didn’t scare me,” Raven says, taking a few steps back towards her room, feeling herself blush slightly, “I just heard a noise.”

“Hi Raven!” Cassie calls from the living room floor, where she’s already got her stuffies out, “Do you want to play Paw Patrol?” the girl clearly not caring about the interaction between the two adults.

“In a minute kiddo,” Raven says with a smile in her direction. “I’m, um, just going to go, uh, put some clothes on now,” Raven stumbles through her words as she looks back to Octavia and finally reaches her bedroom door.

“Yea, probably good,” Octavia says but can’t seem to move her eyes until Raven slips in to her room and clothes the door. Octavia has to shake her head to clear it, Jesus Blake, you’re your head together, she scolds herself.

A few minutes later Raven emerges from her room dressed in a simple pair of blue jeans and a black t-shirt, damp hair laying loose over her shoulders and a textbook in her hand.

Walking in to the living room she sees Cassie still on the floor, stuffies lines up in a circle around her.

“Hey kid,” Raven says crouching down next to the girl, “Where’s mommy?”

“Kitchen,” Cassie answers and Raven can’t help but smile at the girl.

“Alright, I’ll be back in a minute,” Raven tells her, and she stands up, walking to the kitchen door. Sure, enough she finds Octavia there, looking through the cabinets for what to make for dinner. “You know you don’t have to do that every night,” Raven says, and Octavia turns to look at her.

“I know,” she shrugs. “Just something to keep my mind occupied.”

“That short person in the living room doesn’t do that enough?” Raven teases with a grin.

Octavia chuckles but nods.

“I didn’t mean to startle you earlier,” Raven apologizes, “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“Yea, sorry about that,” Octavia says and it’s hard to miss the stress lines on her face. “Traffic was bad, and I had to pick Cassie up from my friend’s house.”

Raven takes a moment and takes in Octavia’s outfit. She’s wearing black dress pants with a light blue button down shirt under a matching black blazer. “Out job hunting again?” Raven guesses.

Octavia nods, pressing her hand to her forehead, “I actually had an interview today at Woods and Lexington.”

Raven raises her eyebrows in surprise, “You had an interview in my building today and I didn’t even know?”

“I was going to stop by after, but you looked busy,” Octavia shrugs.

“You came to my office?” Raven asked now even more surprised.

Octavia quirks a smile at her, “You were working on something pretty intently. I didn’t want to disturb you. You have a really impressive office.”

Raven chuckles and waves a hand in the air, “It’s just how Mrs. Woods keeps me out of every one’s hair. I tend to spread out when I work, but how did your interview go?” Raven asks leaning against the door jamb.

“Um, good,” Octavia says with a heavy sigh. “I start on Monday.”

“Hey, that’s great,” Raven smiles but still can’t help but notice how stressed Octavia looks. “What’s wrong? I thought you’d be excited about the job.”

“I am,” Octavia sighs again. “It’s just that now there’s a few other things I have to figure out.”

“Like?” Raven asks.

“Daycare for one,” Octavia says, letting her hand fall to her side. “It’ll take me a few weeks to be able to afford it there. My friend agreed to watch her for me though so that shouldn’t be too bad.”

“What’s got you stressed then?” Raven asks as she walks in to the kitchen.

“This is the extent of my professional level clothes,” Octavia says, gesturing to her current outfit.

“Ah, yea that got me when I first started working there too,” Raven nods her head knowingly.

“How’d you manage?” Octavia asks as Raven opens the freezer and pulls out a bag of the frozen nuggets, she had bought the other day at the request of the toddler in the house.

“Honestly, Mrs. Woods gave me a few outfits to get through until I had gotten a few paychecks,” Raven shrugs as she puts the bag on the counter. “I have a few outfits that I pretty much never wear anymore. We could see if any of them fit. We’ll probably have to shorten the pants though,” she adds with a chuckle.

“Always with the short jokes,” Octavia says but can’t help but crack a smile.

“Let’s do dinner then we can see about finding something for you to wear to work next week,” Raven says getting a cookie sheet out from under the oven. “I even know a guy that does tailoring that happens to owe me a favor.”

Raven dumps the chicken nuggets out on to the tray and turns the oven on to preheat then turns back to Octavia who has a thoughtful look on her face.

“O, you’re killing me tonight,” Raven says with a sigh. When Octavia looks at her surprised, she adds, “Spill, what else?”

Octavia hesitates before answering, “I’m going in as a entry-level, bottom of the barrel, nobody position basically, which is totally fine. A job’s a job and that. It’s just,” she bites her lip before continuing, “They told me how much I’d be making just to start.”

Raven waits for her to explain more and when she doesn’t Raven sighs, “You’re going to have to fill me in here. I have no idea what they pay accounts.”

“It’s, uh, it’s really good pay,” Octavia says with a half-smile, “More than I’ve ever made.”

“Well, that’s good then,” Raven says as she pops the cookie sheet in to the oven and closes the door.

“Yea, it’s great,” Octavia nods then continues, “but Rae, you’ve been there two years and aren’t in an entry level position. You have to be making some pretty good money.”

“I do alright,” Raven shrugs her shoulders, having a pretty good idea where the conversation is going.

“I’m guessing you could probably afford a nicer apartment or even a house if you wanted it,” Octavia counters. “Not to mention you didn’t need a roommate to help cover the bills.”

Raven grimaces as she leans against the counter next to the oven, “I figured once you got a job, we’d discuss that, but you’re right. I don’t actually need any help with bills.”

“So, the whole asking us to move in was what?” Octavia asks, crossing her arms across her chest.

“I don’t know,” Raven shrugs, “It felt like the right thing to do. I wanted to help you out.”

“I don’t need charity Raven,” Octavia says as she lifts her chin slightly.

“Good, because that’s not what it is,” Raven counters looking at the girl in front of her. “I live in this apartment because it’s close to campus and I knew I’d be going back for my master’s degree, plus I like it here. It’s close to work and my favorite coffee shop is around the corner. It’s comfortable, it’s me.”

Raven sighs but continues, “I don’t want some big, fancy apartment or house. What the hell would I do with all that room?” she asks the rhetorical question as she looks at the ground. “I put money in savings and that, but I like just being able to be me. I’m no one special, just another orphan,” she adds with a shrug. “I asked if you wanted to stay here because I know what it feels like losing people you care about and not knowing where to go or what to do.”

“Rae,” Octavia whispers, her arms falling to her side and when Raven looks back at her there are tears in the girl’s eyes. “I’m sorry. I can be a bit of an ass sometimes.”

“I’m guessing that means you didn’t get your nap today huh?” Raven asks with a wide smile and laughs when Octavia rolls her eyes at her.

An hour later they all sat on the floor in the living room, an empty plate between Raven and Octavia that had held their dinner, with Cassie laying on the floor by the girls’ feet watching one of the many Disney movies that were available on Raven’s TV.

“I think this is one of my favorites,” Raven says, leaning towards Octavia just enough that their shoulders touch briefly.

Octavia can’t help but giggle a little by the sound of Raven’s voice, she’d been captivated since the movie had started, “Guess you don’t watch many kids’ movies, huh?”

“It wasn’t really top of my list to do in my free time,” Raven answers back, “and to be fair I should probably be studying right now.”

“Shhhh,” Cassie says as she turns her head to look at the two adults sitting with their backs against the front of the couch.

“Sorry,” Raven says quietly, trying to do her best not to laugh and when she looks at Octavia, she can see she’s doing the same.

“Did we just get scolded by the toddler?” Raven asks in a whisper.

Octavia chuckles quietly and answers, “Yes, she takes her Disney movies very seriously.”

“I can see why, this is great,” Raven says motioning back to the TV. “What?” she asks when she looks back at Octavia and sees her fighting a smile.

“Nothing,” Octavia answers, trying to force the smile away, “It’s just cute how excited you’re getting over Brave.”

“Come on,” Raven says starting to raise her voice but quickly going back to a whisper to avoid the wrath of Cassie. “She literally took all the societal norms and said fuck off and decided to do her own thing. How awesome is that?”

“No, I agree,” Octavia says trying to sound serious. When Raven shoots her a look she holds her hands up in surrender and does chuckle a little. “You’re cute, but I do agree with you. It’s good to show Cassie that she doesn’t need some guy to save her or complete her.”

“Well said,” Raven says, and she raises her bottle of root beer and clinks it against Octavia’s, to which they both giggle some.

“Mommy,” Cassie says turning her head back to look at them as the movie comes to an end, “Can we watch Nemo?”

“It’s almost time for bed baby,” Octavia says as she sets her bottle back down on the floor. “Maybe tomorrow.”

“But mommy, I’m not tired,” Cassie says as she rubs her eyes.

“Ten minutes in and she’ll be out,” Octavia whispers to Raven.

Raven chuckles but picks up the remote and finds the movie in question. By the time she’s hitting the play button Cassie is already crawling on to Octavia’s lap. The girl curls herself in to a ball, her head resting on Octavia’s chest. Octavia lightly rest her chin on the top of the girl’s head and wraps her arms around the girl so she can get comfortable.

Sure enough, a few minutes in to the movie and the girl’s breathing evens out and she’s fast asleep.

“Damn, that was fast,” Raven comments when she looks over and sees Cassie asleep.

“Yep, that’s usually how it works when she’s fighting sleep like that,” Octavia smiles as she looks down at her daughter, “Clarke said she didn’t have a long nap today.”

“Clarke?” Raven asks raising an eyebrow in question.

“Yea, my friend that watches her for me,” Octavia explains, laying her head on top of Cassie’s so she can look at Raven. “She’s the only person from high school I actually kept in touch with after we left. She’s lives with her parents still on the other side of town.”

“Wait, Clarke we went to school with?” Raven asks, “As in Clarke Griffin?”

“Same one,” Octavia’s smile fades just a little. “You remember her?”

“How do you forget Clarke Griffin?” Raven says, “Her mom’s like one of the best known surgeons in the state. Plus, she was captain on the cheerleading squad and always wore those short skirts to school all the time.”

“Yea, that was her,” Octavia mutters quietly.

Raven has to suppress her smile at Octavia’s words, “She was only the second most popular girl in high school, after you of course.”

“Trying to make me feel better about you drooling over my friend?” Octavia asks, lifting an eyebrow teasingly.

At that Raven does chuckle, “Hardly drooling. Clarke could definitely turn heads in high school, and I’m sure she still can, but she was more Lexa’s crush then mine.”

“Oh yea, who did you have a crush on in high school?” Octavia asks, grinning when she sees Raven’s face flush just a little.

“I spent most of my time studying,” Raven shrugs trying her best to sound nonchalant. “I didn’t really date or even go to things like the prom.”

“Doesn’t mean you didn’t have a crush,” Octavia reasons as she adjust Cassie in her arms just a little. “Doesn’t everyone?”

Raven shrugs, “Don’t know but probably. Guess it’s easy to guess your crush though.”

Octavia smiles sadly but nods her head, “Yea, Lincoln was definitely one of my crushes in high school, but we didn’t start dating until right before Senior year started.”

“So, what, you had other crushes before you and him got together?” Raven asks trying to focus her eyes on the movie playing in front of her. Though to be honest, she had no idea what was going on.

“One really,” Octavia confirms, “but nothing really worked out there.”

“Who was he?” Raven asks, half not even wanting to really know the answer.

“When did I say it was a he?” Octavia asks.

“Oh,” Raven says as a sudden lack of words strikes her, “I guess I didn’t think about that.”

“Just because I never got the chance to date a girl doesn’t mean I’m not attracted to them,” Octavia says with a smile. “I never really talked about it with anyone other than my brother,” she admits.

“There’s nothing wrong with liking whoever you want to,” Raven says, “I certainly won’t judge anyone. I’ve only ever liked girls but that’s just me.”

“I was never sure how our mother would take it,” Octavia admits with a sigh, “She’s always had these picture perfect lives figured out for both me and Bellamy. Being with a girl was never in the picture she had for me. I guess that might be why I never acted on my crush in high school.”

“I can’t imagine. That’s got to be rough,” Raven says with a frown. “I guess that’s the upside to living in a foster home at that age, no one there really cared enough to asks or get upset about it.”

“I’m sorry Rae,” Octavia says, “I shouldn’t talk about it. I keep forgetting.”

“It’s alright,” Raven shrugs, “No one has a perfect home life. It’s ok to talk about it, or anything for that matter.”

“Yea, it just doesn’t seem fair,” Octavia sighs, feeling tears sting her eyes.

“A lot of things aren’t,” Raven nods in agreement. “Best we can do is try and learn something from it and maybe, keep other people from the same thing, or at least help them through it so it’s not as bad for them.”

“That’s a really good way of looking at it,” Octavia says with a smile.

“I’ve had plenty of time to think about it,” Raven smiles back. They sit there a few more moments as the movie continues to play on.

“I should probably get her to bed,” Octavia says after a while.

“Do you need any help?” Raven asks as she moves to get up.

“No, I’ve got her,” Octavia assures her, “Stay here, I’ll be right back.”

Raven nods and settles back down. She watches as Octavia easily manages to stand up, Cassie barely moving, and straightens herself in to a standing position. Octavia throws a wink at Raven before she turns and disappears down the short hallway leading to their rooms.

Raven can only chuckle and turn her attention back to the TV in front of her. She hasn’t been paying attention to the movie as it had played and now, she was lost as she watches an orange fish and a blue one talk to a trio of sharks.

“What the hell?” Raven mumbles to herself. Deciding to just let the movie continue, she lets her head rest back on the couch behind her. She doesn’t realize how long she’s had her eyes closed until she feels Octavia sit back on the floor beside her.

Raven opens her eyes and picks her head back up, looking at the girl beside her.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you,” Octavia apologizes with a sheepish smile.

“I wasn’t sleeping,” Raven shakes her head. “Just resting my head.”

“I brought you a drink,” Octavia says, handing Raven one of the two beers she had brought form the kitchen.

“I didn’t even hear you walk past,” Raven chuckles as she accepts the drink.

“One of the upsides to being so little,” Octavia teases with a smile. “I’m sneaky.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Raven chuckles as she lifts the bottle and takes a sip.

“You do know that this movie was out when we were kids,” Octavia says after watching the movie for a few minutes.

“Really?” Raven asks sounding surprised.

“Yup, came out 2003 or something,” Octavia nods, looking at Raven, “You’ve never really watched kids’ movies, have you?”

“My parents put a lot of emphasize on reading and studying,” Raven shrugs, “I didn’t watch a lot of TV before or after.”

Octavia hesitates for a second before asking, “What happened? To your parents I mean.”

Raven freezes half way from lifting her bottle back to her mouth and Octavia bites her lower lip.

“I’m sorry,” she says, “You don’t have to talk about it. It’s just no one ever talked about it in school and…”

“It’s ok,” Raven says cutting off her ramble. “I just haven’t walked about it in a while.” She sighs and sets her bottle on the floor beside her. “My mom got sick, cancer, by the time they caught it there were already masses on her liver, stomach, and in her lungs. There wasn’t anything they could do so we just waited it out,” Raven stops and shakes her head sadly. “It didn’t take long. Within four months she was bed ridden and a month later she was gone.”

“That fast?” Octavia asks, shocked that someone could go from healthy to gone in such a short amount of time.

“Yea,” Raven says drawing the word a out some. “It was tough, but my dad took it the hardest, I think. He couldn’t go back to work, barely ate and I never saw him sleeping. It was like he had died when my mother had, he was just a shell of a person that I lived with.” Raven picked up her drink and took a long sip from it. “I came home from school one afternoon, about two months after my mother died and found him. He had hung himself in their bedroom.”

“Raven,” Octavia whispers but finds herself at a loss for words. She reaches over and lays her hand on Raven’s arm. “I’m sorry,” she says, it’s nowhere near enough but they’re the only words she can find.

“It was years ago now,” Raven says as she reaches up and wipes at her eyes, determined to not let any tears fall, not for this, not anymore. “After that I bounced around to a few foster homes, not many people want to deal with teenagers.”

“That had to be rough,” Octavia says, feeling her own eyes burn with tears for her friend.

“I didn’t exactly make it easy,” Raven admits with a sideways grin. “I took the angsty teenager thing to a whole new level. If you thought I came across as a tough ass in school, that was mild compared to what I was like there.”

“You were going though a lot,” Octavia counters. “No one can blame you for acting out.”

“Acting out or not, I was an ass back then,” Raven sighs. “I finally got to the point though, I think it was in senior year, when I figured out, I was just taking my anger out on everyone else.”

“So, what’d you do?” Octavia asks, watching the girl beside her.

“Lexa introduced me to her older sister, Anya,” Raven answers with a smile. “She owns her own shop just outside of town and I started spending a lot of time there. Turns out working on things with my hands made me feel better.”

“Is that how you go in to engineering?” Octavia asks curiously.

“Yea granted the job I ended up with wasn’t exactly the same as working on car engines,” Raven chuckles slightly, “but I still like it. Plus, Anya still lets me go down to her shop to work on my car when I’m having a rough day or just need a break.”

“I’m glad you found something that helps,” Octavia smiles at the girl.

“Me too,” Raven agrees with a nod, “I’m not sure you would have liked me back in high school.”

“I don’t know,” Octavia counters, “You were still you, even if you were still trying to figure things out. I’d like to think I would have still seen that.”

“I’d like to think that too,” Raven looks at Octavia with a smile.

Without thinking too much Octavia leans over and places a quick kiss on Raven’s cheek, “Thank you for sharing that with me.”

Raven feels her face heat up and knows she’s blushing, but she clears her throat and answers, “Thank you for asking.”

“We’re friends now Rae,” Octavia smiles as she settles back against the front of the couch, “That’s what we do.”

They turn their attention back to the movie they had already missed almost half of at that point. After a few minutes Octavia leans over again, this time resting her head on Raven’s shoulder as they watch in silence. They stay like that until sometime after the credits had finished rolling and they decide it was probably wise to go to turn in for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been great getting to write this and see all your wonderful comments. If you want to chat or offer input you can come find me on tumblr: justbecause8108


	4. Day Twenty-One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mother's Day happens and Raven tries to do something special. Both having feelings about it and start to wonder at what's going on. We're also on week three of living together!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Mother's Day!!!!!  
> I know I'm a few days early but I'm taking the fam to NYC for the weekend and I don't know when or if I'll be able to post anything while I'm up there. Hope you all enjoy!!! As always, I love to hear from you guys!!!!

Raven has never been much of a morning person so when her alarm started to blare early on a Sunday morning it took all her restraint not to throw it across the room. Sundays were relaxing days, she never made plans on Sundays because that was the one day of the week where she just started home and got ready for the coming week.

That was until she had been talking to Lexa the afternoon before and she had mentioned that her family was taking her mother and grandmother out for lunch the next day, Mother’s Day.

Raven had stopped caring about holidays nine years ago, when she’d lost the only reason you celebrated holidays, family. So, she had of course shrugged it off as she always does until she remembered one very important fact, she currently lives with a mother.

At a complete loss for what to do on such short notice Raven had come up with the only thing she could think of and so she reaches over and taps her phone, killing the alarm. With a groan she hauls herself out of bed and grabs her robe from the foot of her bed.

She slips the robe on as she quietly opens her bedroom door and slips out in to the small hallway between her room and Octavia’s. Trying to keep her footsteps as quiet as possible she takes the few steps and carefully turns the knob to the other girl’s room.

Opening it a crack she looks in and sees Octavia, still asleep in bed. Pushing the door opening a little bit more she sees Cassie, laying in bed but eyes open, holding one of her stuffies in front of her.

“Psst,” Raven gets the little girl’s attention and watches as the girl smiles when she sees Raven. Raven immediately holds her finger up to her lips to keep the girl from saying her name. Cassie mimics her and Raven smiles at the girl, gesturing for Cassie to come to her.

Raven watches as the girl crawls over the bedside railing, something she had learned to do with the first few days of moving in. Raven shakes her head at the ease in which the girl gets out of bed and waddles over to the door, stuffie still in hand.

“Hey, short stuff,” Raven whispers as the girl joins her in the hallway and she carefully closes the door again.

“Raven,” Cassie says still sounding a bit sleepy and she holds her arms up to Raven, who smiles and lifts the girl up, placing her on her hip.

“Are you not awake yet?” Raven asks the girl with a smile as she walks them in to the kitchen. When Cassie shakes her head Raven chuckles and says, “Me either, but we’re going to make mommy breakfast today.”

“Pancakes?” Cassie asks as they enter the kitchen.

“Yep,” Raven pops the p as she sets Cassie down on the counter, “and you’re going to help me this time.” At those words the little girl perks up.

“Stay right there,” Raven tells the girl as she grabs her tablet and pulls up the recipe, she’d found the night before, “Can you believe I’ve never done this before?” she asks the girl with a grin. She stands back in front of the girl, placing her one hand against the girl’s front to make sure she stays put, and she reads down over the screen.

“Oh, this isn’t hard,” Raven chuckles as she shows the screen to Cassie, not that the girl could read it, but Raven likes to keep the kid included. “What do you think?” she asks with a smile.

“Pancakes!” Cassie exclaims, clapping her hands together.

“Alright then,” Raven nods, “let’s get to work then.”

Little over half an hour later and Raven was placing oddly shaped pancakes on to a plate, along with eggs, bacon and toast.

“Looks pretty good I think,” Raven says with a nod and looks at Cassie, who’s now sitting on one of the kitchen chairs, half a pancake in her mouth. “Ready to go wake mommy up?”

“Mommy,” Cassie says around her mouthful of pancake.

“Ok, finish that and we’ll go,” Raven nods trying to hold back the smile. Tomorrow would mark three weeks since she had run in to Octavia out of the blue and in that time Raven had found herself adapting pretty quickly to living with a toddler.

Cassie swallow her pancake and slides down off the chair before Raven had a chance to help her down.

“Daredevil,” Raven mumbles with a smile and picks up the plate and cup of coffee she’d made. To be fair it was the third cup of coffee she’d made that morning, she’d needed the first two just to get herself through making breakfast.

Cassie hurries down the hallway, as fast as her little legs can go, and pushes open the door to the room she shares with her mother.

“Mommy! Breakfast!” Cassie announces as the door opens and she goes running to her mother’s bed.

Raven winches, not exactly how she had been hoping to wake Octavia up, as she walks in to the room behind the girl. Octavia stirs a little, lifting her hand to cover her face.

“Not yet baby,” Octavia mumbles and Raven wonders for the first time if this had been a good idea. The only reason she’d gotten up as early as she did was because she knows that Cassie rarely sleeps in past six.

“Mommy,” Cassie says again, now pulling on the blanket covering Octavia, “Raven made breakfast.”

At the mention of her name and food Octavia cracks open her eyes and looks at Raven, still sleepily. Realization hits her and the girl sits up in the bed. It’s then that Raven realizes something else she hadn’t thought about. She usually doesn’t see Octavia in the mornings and when she does, the girl’s been awake for a while and she’s usually sporting her own robe by then if not fully dressed.

Right now, though Octavia was wearing just a tank top and short sleep pants and her hair was still a bit wild from sleep. Raven couldn’t help but notice the sleepy smile that pulled at the other girl’s lips when her eyes met Raven’s.

“Happy Mother’s Day,” Raven says with a smile and a shrug. “I may not have thought this out completely. If you want to wait…”

“Raven,” Octavia interrupts her and when Raven stops talking, she says, “Can I have my breakfast?”

“Uh, yea,” Raven says as she quickly takes the few steps to the bed and hands Octavia the plate and the cup of coffee. “Here you go.”

“Smells great,” Octavia says as she places the plate on the bed and takes a deep breath of the coffee. Cassie starts to pull on the blanket again and Raven bends down, scoping the girl up in her arms and placing her on the bed next to Octavia.

“Happy Mommy Day,” Cassie says as she leans in to Octavia’s side, giving her mother a hug.

“Thank you, baby,” Octavia says as she wraps her free arms around the girl and kisses the to of her head.

“I’ll leave you two to your breakfast,” Raven says with a smile as she excuses herself from the room. She closes the door behind her and makes her way back in to the kitchen, sighing when she sees the mess she’s made. “Well, hell,” she mumbles as she starts to clean up.

Raven’s almost done cleaning up when she hears a voice behind her, “Thank you.”

Raven turns around from the sink and smiles at Octavia, who’s standing in the doorway of the kitchen, now wearing her robe, hair slightly less as wild as it had been.

“It’s literally nothing,” Raven says with a shrug, “I’d honestly forgotten it was Mother’s Day until Lexa said something about it last night.”

“You know it’s the first time I’ve had anything on Mother’s Day,” Octavia replies.

“Really?” Raven asks, quirking an eyebrow as she reaches for a dishtowel to dry her hands.

“Cassie wasn’t a year old last year at this time and we were still on the East Coast,” Octavia shrugs as Cassie comes walking in to the kitchen and over to Raven. She holds her arms up to Raven who tosses the towel on the counter and picks her up.

“Pancakes,” Cassie says with a smile at Raven who chuckles but picks up a small pancake and hands it to the girl.

“I think she’s got you trained,” Octavia laughs as she walks in to the kitchen and sits at the table.

“Seems that way,” Raven says as she sits Cassie down at the table, across from her mother, “but she’s cute so I’ll let her get away with it, for now.”

“Ah, is that all it takes?” Octavia teases from behind her coffee cup.

Raven rolls her eyes but smiles as she opens the fridge and pulls out the juice for Cassie. She opens the cabinet and pulls down one of Cassie’s plastic cups with a lid.

“That’s supposed to be my job,” Octavia sighs as she sets her coffee cup down on the table and stands up.

“Isn’t Mother’s Day supposed to be like your day off or something?” Raven counters as she pours the juice in to the cup.

“Not always an option when you’re a single parent,” Octavia sighs as she comes to stand next to Raven.

“Well, today you take it easy and we’ll do whatever you want to do,” Raven says as she sits the cup down in front of Cassie. The little girl picks it up and takes a big gulp of the juice before returning to stuffing pancake in her mouth.

“Whatever I want huh?” Octavia cocks a teasing eyebrow at Raven and is rewarded with a slight blush. It had quickly become one of her favorite sights, Raven, just slightly flustered and blushing.

Octavia thinks for a bit and then answers, “How about we spend some time down at the park?”

“The one around the corner?” Raven asks as she finishes packing up the left over pancakes and pops them in the fridge.

“Yea,” Octavia says with a nod, “We’ve driven past it every day since we moved in. It looks nice.”

“Never been there,” Raven admits as she wipes her hands off on a dish towel, “but sure. We can go and see what it’s like.”

They don’t actually make it to the park until almost noon. Raven insist that she’ll get Cassie ready and that Octavia should take the day off, so Octavia did and went to sit in the living room while Raven tried to get Cassie ready. This of course included getting her washed up from the mess she’d made on herself from breakfast.

“Are you like this when your mother does this?” Raven asks as Cassie splashes water at her for probably the tenth time in as many minutes.

Cassie’s only response is to laugh as she continues to splash in the water. What had started out as just trying to get syrup and jelly off the child had basically turned in to a bath, only in the bathroom sink, which meant that the counter and floor were covered in water.

Raven hears Octavia laughing from the living room and throws a glare that way, of course it doesn’t last as she turns back to Cassie.

“Alright, no more water,” Raven says as she pulls the stopper and the water drains out of the sink. “Guess these clothes are done for,” she sighs as she sets Cassie down on the floor and pulls the girls night shirt over her head. It’s at that point that Cassie had decided to run laps around the apartment.

Once she’d managed to wrangle the toddler and get her dressed both Raven and Cassie needed a nap, to which Octavia could only laugh, but she used that time to get herself ready.

When Octavia stepped out of her room again, she was dressed in her favorite pair of jeans and a dark blue tank top. Raven had to actively remind herself she shouldn’t let her eyes linger on her roommate and she quickly dismissed herself to get ready.

In the time it took Raven to get ready Octavia managed to throw together a bag of things to take with them, including a blanket and some snacks and of course some of Cassie’s favorite toys.

Now they sit together, on the blanket Octavia had packed, as Cassie plays with two of her stuffies. Raven leaning back on her arms, her legs spread out in front of her. Octavia was sitting with her legs curled up under her, Cassie taking up the area her legs would normally take, and she watches her daughter for a moment.

“This was a good day,” she says at length.

“It’s barely lunchtime,” Raven says looking over at her with a grin.

“Still,” Octavia shrugs, “it’s been fun already.”

“I’m glad you’re enjoying it,” Raven says as she lounges back on her elbows. “This park was a great idea.” The park wasn’t huge but from where they were sitting, they could look out over the little part of town they lived in, just making out the campus.

“It is nice,” Octavia says with a sigh. “I feel like I haven’t gotten to catch my breath in such a long time.”

“I guess the midget here keeps you running,” Raven teases as Cassie crawls over to her and flops on her stomach.

Octavia laughs and shakes her head at the two as Raven starts tickling Cassie, causing the girl to squeal, “She can be a handful,” Octavia agrees.

“Ah, she’s not all bad,” Raven smiles as she picks up one of Cassie’s toys.

“No, she’s not,” Octavia agrees watching the two. “You know, I still can’t believe how quickly she’s taken to you. It’s like you’ve always been there.”

“She makes it easy,” Raven shrugs looking up at Octavia. The tree behind them filters the sun light through, causing Octavia’s hair to shine and she gives off a glow that blanks Raven’s mind. She felt like she was in high school again, catching sight of Octavia from across the field in gym class. Dark hair shining almost as brightly as the green in her eyes.

“You ok?” Octavia asks startling Raven who clears her throat and looks away.

“Yea, um, good, fine,” Raven stammers and she hears Octavia chuckle. “You enjoy doing that, don’t you?”

“What?” Octavia asks fainting innocence.

“Getting me flustered,” Raven admits with a faint blush.

“Sometimes,” Octavia admits with a smile, “but you do make it easy.”

“Thanks,” Raven mumbles but is still smiling. “I suppose I do.”

“In my defense, I don’t think I did anything that time,” Octavia smile at her.

Raven doesn’t answer but does nod in agreement. Deciding to break any awkwardness Octavia reaches in to the bag she’s packed and pulls out a book.

“What’s that?” Raven asks, resting back on her elbows again, now that Cassie has decided to go back to quietly playing with her toys, leaning slightly against Raven’s side.

“I find you in the darkness,” Octavia tells her the title, “It’s a collection of poems from this woman who used to work in radiation therapy.”

“What kind of poems?” Raven asks as she leans to the side slightly, making sure not to disturb Cassie.

“Heartbreak and healing,” Octavia answers with a sigh, “it’s been really helpful dealing with…. everything.”

“Do you want to read some?” Raven asks and when Octavia gives her a questioning look, she adds, “Out loud I mean.”

“You want to hear me read?” Octavia asks, sounding a little skeptical.

“Sure,” Raven smiles as she lets herself lay flat on the blanket, head close to Octavia’s legs but not touching. “Your voice isn’t that bad,” Raven shots her a teasing smile.

“Smartass,” Octavia says but she opens her book to the page she had marked. “I want you. I want you inside and out. The parts you cover with laughter. The depth you shrug off with indifference. I want you. I want you to take me to the place you’ve hidden your heart. I want to walk by your side on this journey. You’re worth it. We’re worth it. Because…. I want you.”

“Wow,” Raven says after a pause, it took her that long to get her voice back, “that’s pretty intense.”

“Yea, she’s good,” Octavia says in a quiet voice. She’d read that one a few times over the last few days, for whatever reason it had hit a cord with her, and she’d left it marked. “That’s one of the poems about healing and how hard it can be and how it can take time.”

“Yes, it can,” Raven replies in nearly a whisper, “Keep read?” she asks Octavia who nods and continues.

After a few pages Octavia absent-mindedly starts running her fingers through Raven’s hair, pushing the strays back from her face. They stay like that, until Octavia realizes that both Cassie and Raven have fallen asleep, Cassie tucked in to Raven’s side with Raven’s arm protectively around the girl.

The sight is almost enough to make Octavia cry. There had been so many times over the last two years that she’d hoped for a day like today, to see a scene like the one in front of her. She’d thought for sure that she had given up on that hope, but in this moment now, she realized she hadn’t.

Octavia looks down at the girl sleeping next to her and smiles. She remembers Raven from high school better than Raven seems to think she does. Though they hadn’t been friends, they’d had plenty of classes together and it hadn’t gone unnoticed by Octavia that the girl was hurting. There had always been a sadness under the tough exterior Raven had portrayed.

Octavia was happy to see that the pain in her eyes had subsided some, there was still a touch of it there on bad days. Those were days that Octavia could understand all too well, she still had more of those than she let on. It wasn’t easy going from thinking you had your life planned out to realizing you were on your own, and by the way now you have a child to figure out how to raise by yourself.

Octavia frowns as she thinks of everything Raven has done for them over the past three weeks, how much she had changed her life around them.

 _What if she decides she’s had enough?_ Octavia worries. _I’ve put so much on her and that’s not fair to her_.

Raven stirs a little, moving closer to Octavia, who reaches down and runs her fingers through the other girl’s hair again.

“I hope you stay with us,” Octavia says in barely a whisper.

**

Later that day, after they’d returned home and made a simple dinner, and after Cassie had passed out on the couch, Raven stood at the kitchen sink. She’d just finished washing the last of the dinner dishes and was drying her hand on one of the dish towels that traditionally hung from the front of the stove.

Today had been a good day, or at least she was hoping it had been. She hadn’t meant to fall asleep in the park but after getting up before the sun and running around with Cassie she had been wiped. Well, that and having Octavia run her fingers through Raven’s hair and Raven was a goner.

The poetry Octavia had read had made Raven start to think about things she hadn’t in years, things she thought she was past but was only starting to realize she had just pushed them aside. She’d told herself that losing her parents hadn’t been the disaster it was and that bouncing from one foster home to the next from the time she was thirteen hadn’t mattered.

All throughout high school she pretended that she hadn’t heard the comments the other students made about her. She had acted like their words weren’t daggers that cut as her as she walked down the hallways.

Shaking her head Raven turns her thoughts back to the day. Everything had been great until they left the park, not long after Cassie and Raven had woken up. Cassie declaring it lunch time they had packed up their little spot and headed out to find a place for lunch.

At that point Raven noticed Octavia had started to act differently, at least towards her. The shorter woman had barely made eye contact the rest of the day and what had become their usual teasing seemed to disappear almost completely. Raven couldn’t help but wonder if she had done something wrong.

Taking a deep breath, she leans against the sink, closing her eyes and exhaling slowly, she tries to clear her mind again.

“Everything ok?” she hears a voice behind her that makes her smile, despite the turmoil in her head.

“Always,” Raven answers, opening her eyes and glancing over at the doorway, where Octavia is standing.

“You’re a shitty liar Rae,” Octavia says leaning against the doorjamb.

Raven chuckles but nods and turns her back to the sink, “I’m just tired. The kid sure has a lot of energy.”

“That she does,” Octavia smiles, throwing a glance over her shoulder to where Cassie is still out cold on the couch. “I should probably get her to bed.”

“Are you alright?” Raven asks before she can stop herself. When she gets a puzzled look from Octavia she elaborates, “After the park, you seemed different. Upset maybe,” Raven shrugs as she looks at her feet. “I thought maybe I had done something.”

“Raven, no,” Octavia says softly, “Today was amazing. It was…it was a day I’ve been hoping for now for a while. Since before Cassie, it’s just… I don’t know.”

“Not with the right person,” Raven takes a guess. When she sees Octavia start to argue she says quickly, “It’s ok. You don’t have to explain or say sorry or any of that. It’s ok to still get upset.”

“It wasn’t that,” Octavia says, her voice small for just a moment. Then she clears her throat and says, “It was a great day Raven, we both loved it. I’m sorry I made things rough this afternoon.”

“O,” Raven sighs, letting her arms drop to her side, “You don’t have to apologize for getting upset. Believe me, I know some days are rougher than other.”

 _Do you know that I’m scared you’re going to get sick of us?_ Octavia thinks to herself and her eyes water.

“Hey, it’s ok,” Raven says as she takes a step towards the other girl and lightly rest her hand on Octavia’s arm. “If we don’t want to do park days anymore, we don’t’ have to.”

Octavia shakes her head, but tears insist on finding their way out and trail down her cheek. With that Raven opens her arms and pulls Octavia close, wrapping her arms around the girl. Octavia rests her head against Raven’s shoulder and lets her tears fall. Tears of loss and sadness, of joy and happiness and of fear.

After a moment Octavia whispers against Raven’s shoulder, “I’d really like to do more park days.”

She feels Raven chuckle slightly and say, “Ok, we can do that. Next time I’ll try not to fall asleep on you.”

That makes Octavia chuckle and she pulls back from Raven just enough to break the contact between them, something she misses immediately. That’s when she notices the tear marks on Raven’s cheeks as well.

“Rae,” she says softly but Raven just shakes her head and smirks.

“You’re contagious Blake,” she jokes but wipes at her tears. With a shrug she adds, “Somedays it just hurts, being human and all.”

“Yea it does,” Octavia agrees with a nod, “but when it does, just remember, you’re not alone.”

“You either,” Raven says with a smile, “and I’m not going anywhere.”

“Promise?” Octavia asks before thinking it through. She looks away, half afraid of whatever answer Raven’s going to give. When there’s silence she looks back and sees Raven watching her with a knowing smile.

The girl smirks and answers, “Absolutely. You don’t think I’ve invested this much time in to learning all about Paw Patrol to just leave do you?”

At that Octavia can’t help but laugh, “You’re insane Reyes.”

“Ha look who’s talking,” Raven smiles back and just like that the sadness seems to evaporate.

“I’m going to put the tiny human to bed,” Octavia says turning towards the living room, “Want to watch a movie?”

“As long as it’s nothing sappy,” Raven calls after her and she hears Octavia laugh.

“Hey, it’s still Mother’s Day,” Octavia grins, picking Cassie up carefully, “So, it’s my pick, right?”

“Why did I ever tell you that?” Raven jokes as she leans in the doorway of the kitchen. “Are you going to be like this every year on Mother’s Day?”

“Guess you’ll have to stick around and find out,” Octavia answers with a smile as she walks past Raven and heads to her room, sleeping child in her arms.


	5. Day Twenty-Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay on getting this one out there. It was a long week and I didn't get the time to sit down and write as much as I would have liked to. I also got hit with losing a friend this past week so it was hard to get my mind into writing mood for the last couple of days.  
> I hope this is a good chapter but I'm also worried because it was tough going at the end. Hope you guys enjoy it and as always, let me know what you think.

Raven rolled over in her bed, stretching her arms above her head as she did. She wasn’t sure what had woken her, but she wasn’t awake enough to worry about it, knowing she’d fall back asleep easily. She can’t remember what she’d been dreaming about but she knew it was a good dream, she’d woken up smiling.

There was a noise from the hallway and Raven lifts her head from her pillow and looks at the clock beside her bed; **0345**.

Shaking her head to try and wake up she listens and when she hears the sound of coughing coming from the bathroom she gets up, throwing the blankets off and grabbing her robe. She swings her bedroom door open and sees light spilling coming from their shared bathroom. There is another cough, this time Raven realizes how small a cough it was.

“O, is everything alright?” Raven asks as she lightly knocks on the bathroom door.

She hears the sound of movement and a muffled voice but then the door swings open, revealing an exhausted looking Octavia, her hair and mess and bags under her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Octavia says softly. “I was trying not to wake you up. Cassie’s been sick most of the night.”

“How sick?” Raven asks concerned, as she looks past Octavia and sees Cassie sitting on the floor.

“Cough, runny nose, fever,” Octavia says as she steps back from the door. “And she just threw up all over herself.”

Raven hesitates as she watches Octavia kneel down next to the girl and strip her out of her sleep shirt. “Do you need any help?” she asks as Octavia tosses the shirt aside.

“I just need to get her cleaned up,” Octavia says, without turning around.

Raven grabs a washcloth from the small closet in the hallway and makes it wet, ringing it out before she hands it to Octavia.

“Thanks,” Octavia says with a tired smile. She gets Cassie cleaned up, the poor kid coughing off and on the entire time. Raven notices how flushed the girl’s cheeks are.

“Do we need to take her to the doctor or something?” Raven asks once Octavia has finished cleaning the girl up.

“Not yet,” Octavia shakes her head as she lifts Cassie. “I don’t usually do the doctor unless she’s sick longer than a few hours or her fever gets too high.”

“So, what now?” Raven asks as she steps out of the way so Octavia can leave the bathroom.

“I’m going to try and get some sleep,” Octavia sighs stopping in the hallway. “I either need to call off work tomorrow or see if Clarke can watch her for me. Can’t take her to day care with a fever.”

“It’s Thursday,” Raven says with a shrug, “I’m off work. Maybe I could watch her?”

“You want to watch her?” Octavia asks as Cassie lays her head on her mother’s shoulder.

“I mean, yea, I can…. try,” Raven stumbles over her words. Her tired mind trying to catch up with her mouth. “I think I can handle it.”

Octavia stands there, deep in thought. Raven can tell by the way she’s biting her lower lip.

“Do you know how to handle a sick toddler?” Octavia asks at length.

“Chicken noodle soup and rest?” Raven asks with a shrug. It was the only thing her mind could think up.

“Something like that,” Octavia says, the corner of her mouth turning up in a smile. “I can write down some other stuff to help.”

“That’d be good,” Raven nods. “Try to get some sleep until you have to go to work.”

“I’ll let you know when I’m leaving,” Octavia says with a smile, then her and Cassie disappear into their room.

Raven returns to her room and flops down on to her bed with a loud sigh.

 _Way to go Raven_ , she thinks to herself, _you just volunteered to watch a sick kid and you have no idea what you’re doing_. “Well, this could be interesting,” she says out loud as she lets her eyes drift shut.

It feels like it’s only been five minutes when Raven hears a knock on her door followed by a soft voice, “Raven? Are you awake?”

“I’m up,” Raven replies as she forces herself into a sitting position in bed.

“I’m about to leave for work,” Octavia says, still through the door.

“Right,” Raven huffs out a breath and gets out of bed. She drags herself to the door and swings it open. She’s seen Octavia dressed for work before, at least at the end of the day on the few days they had actually gotten home at close to the same time. Raven had this tendency to stay at work well after others had left at their designated three o’clock punch out time.

For whatever reason, Raven blames her tired mind, the sight of Octavia standing at her door, dressed in a black skirt that sits just below her knees and matching blazer, along with a light green shirt that brings out the green in her eyes, causes a lump to form in her throat.

“You ok?” Octavia asks, lifting an eyebrow in question.

“Yea,” Raven manages as she forces words to form, “Just trying to wake up.”

“Cassie is still sleeping so hopefully she stays that way for a while,” Octavia says, watching Raven as she speaks, verifying that she’s hearing everything she says. “I left a note on my dresser about meds and who to call if she gets sicker.”

“Right,” Raven nods numbly.

“Do you want to lay down in my bed for a while?” Octavia asks, surprising Raven who scolds herself for misunderstanding the words at first.

“In case you don’t hear her wake up,” Octavia clarifies with a smile.

“Oh, yea, that makes sense,” Raven nods as she steps out of her room and closes the door.

Octavia leads the way back into her room, where Cassie is snoring lightly from her bed. Octavia leans over and places a soft kiss on the top of the sleeping child’s head.

“Call me if you need anything,” Octavia says in a whisper to Raven, who nods in reply. With that Octavia is gone, the front door closing quietly behind her.

Raven sighs, looks at Octavia’s bed and shakes her head. Deciding that she’d rather chance it with a sick toddler, she crawls into the bed next to Cassie. Luckily Raven had bought a twin bed despite the kid being so little. Today it worked to her advantage as Cassie was curled up and sleeping against the wall.

I hope I know what I’m getting myself into, Raven thinks as she closes her eyes and lets herself drift off.

Before long she is woken up by the feeling of someone’s hand on her cheek.

“Raven,” Cassie says in a quiet voice, “Up. Up.”

“Yea, I’m up,” Raven chuckles as she opens her eyes and sees that she’s now face to face with the little girl. “How you feeling?” she asks as she places her hand on Cassie’s forehead. “Still pretty warm there kiddo.”

“Hot,” Cassie repeats Raven with a sigh.

“Let’s check the note your mommy left for us,” Raven says as she carefully crawls over the railing. She reaches the dresser in a few steps and picked up the note, turning back around to make sure Cassie hadn’t decided to follow her and climb out of bed.

“You really don’t feel good,” Raven comments when she sees that Cassie is still sitting in bed. Glancing at the note she skims it for important information. “Alright, so it says that if you still have a fever at eight,” Raven glances at the clock next to Octavia’s bed. It reads 0814. “Which you do,” Raven continues, “to give you more Tylenol. Also, the thermometer is in the bathroom and to check your temperature before giving you meds.”

Raven looks away from the note and back to Cassie who is just watching her, a cough escaping her ever now and then.

“Right, so let’s go see if we can find this thing,” Raven mods as she walks back over to the bed. As she gets closer Cassie throws her arms up so that when Raven bends down the little girl can wrap her arms around Raven’s neck.

They make their way to the bathroom and Raven sets Cassie on the counter. Keeping one hand on Cassie to make sure she stays balanced; Raven opens the medicine cabinet and pulls out what she thinks is a thermometer.

“Going to be completely honest here,” she says to Cassie as she closes the cabinet and sets the thermometer on the sink next to her. “I’ve never actually used one of these things before.”

She pulls it out of its case and looks at it. There’s already a cover on one end, probably from when Octavia had used it a few hours ago. She hits a button under that and the cover pops off and flies half way across the bathroom.

“So, that wasn’t right,” she mumbles, finding another cover and securing it on the end. After that she easily finds the power button and the littler screen lights up.

“Ok, cool,” Raven sighs, “Now what?” she looks at Cassie.

The girl smiles as she sticks her finger in her ears and goes, “Beep.”

“Gotcha,” Raven says as she gently places the end in the girl’s ear. Nothing beeps and Raven removes it with a frown.

“Right, so I help design buildings for a living. I should be able to figure this out,” she mumbles as she looks the thing over. Finding a small button on the top she replaces the thermometer in Cassie’s ear and presses the button.

There’s a small beep and she pulls it back out. Looking at the screen she sees 99.8.

“Right, so you still have a fever,” Raven nods. She reopens the cabinet, still one handed, and replaces the thermometer, grabbing the baby Tylenol in its place. “So, you get this much,” Raven says as she reads the directions and squeezes the right amount into the little dropper.

She hesitates, remember horror stories from Anya about when her kids were sick. Luckily for her Cassie is not just any kid and she easily takes the medication without a fight.

“Cool,” Raven says as she replaces the meds in the cabinet, closing it. “You probably need breakfast, huh? How’s your tummy feel?” Raven asks as she bends down to be face to face with Cassie.

“Ok,” Cassie says, still sounding as asleep as Raven feels.

“Alright,” Raven says as she picks the girl up off the counter, “We’ll start easy. How about toast?”

“Toast!’ Cassie repeats as excitedly as a sick, exhausted toddler can.

“That’s what I say,” Raven smiles as they walk into the kitchen, “Toast!”

**

While Octavia had managed to make it most of the way through her workday, by two o’clock she was starting to worry. She hadn’t heard anything from Raven in almost an hour, and while she had said that Cassie’s fever had finally broke, Octavia was starting to get nervous.

Luckily for Octavia her supervisor, Sinclair, a man with greying hair around his temples, had taken pity on her and let her leave an hour early.

She’d argued that she was fine to stay but he had insisted that they could manage without her, he also had kids and understood how stressful it could be when they were sick.

Octavia slowly opens and closes the front door of the apartment, hoping that Cassie is napping, and kicks her shoes off. She walks into the living room and stops in her tracks at what she sees.

Raven is laying on the couch, legs dangling off the front, head resting on the arm rest, fast asleep. Cassie lays tucked into Raven’s side, between her and the back cushion of the couch. Another Disney movie was still playing on the screen and if Octavia had to guess she’d say they had sat down to watch and had fallen asleep.

Octavia feels her chest tighten slightly at the sight and she allows herself a small smile.

She squats down next to the couch and carefully reaches over, brushing hair out of Cassie’s face, and she feels that the girl is much cooler than she had been this morning. The girl’s eyes slowly open and she looks at Octavia with a sleepy smile.

“Hi baby,” Octavia whispers, hoping not to wake Raven up.

“Hi,” Cassie replies rubbing her eyes. She starts to move, which Raven feels and wakes up instantly. Raven’s arm, the one that had been laying loosely around the girl, tightens as her eyes open and she looks down.

When her eyes focus, she on Octavia she starts to sit up, surprise on her face.

“Hey,” she says, sounding almost as sleepy as Cassie had, “What time is it?”

“Little after two,” Octavia answers with a smile, “I was trying not to wake you.”

“It’s ok,” Raven says with a grin. “I was worried she’d fall so I was trying to sleep light.”

“I think you did fine,” Octavia smiles back, resting her hand on Raven’s leg. “Sinclair let me come home early.”

“He’s a good guy,” Raven says as Cassie starts to crawl over her lap. “Her fever broke just before noon. She got real tired after that so we laid down to watch a movie. I was hoping she’d take a nap.”

“Looks like you both did,” Octavia chuckles as she takes Cassie in her arms and stands up.

“Hey, babysitting is tough work,” Raven jokes as she stretches out her shoulders.

“I’m going to see if I can get her back to sleep,” Octavia says and heads down the hall to her room.

Raven nods as she stands up from the couch, looking to the TV she sees the end credits come to a close. A large snow creature walks on to the screen and picks up a crown, putting it gently on its head and the screen goes black.

“I’m sure that would have made sense if I’d stayed awake,” Raven mumbles to herself as she heads into the kitchen. She goes straight to the coffee pot and pours herself a cup, taking a sip and hoping she can wake the rest of the way up.

Raven had never considered what it would be like to have a kid in her life, especially not on a regular basis like with Cassie. In fact, Raven had been pretty convinced that the last thing she wanted was to have kids.

Sure, she was fine when she visited Lexa and Anya and her kids were over, but that was easy. Spend some time, play with the kids and load them up on sugar before she went home. She’d been perfectly content with that, at least until Octavia had strolled back into her life.

It’d barely been a month and already Raven was rethinking what it was she really wanted and after spending most of the day with just Cassie she felt herself even more unsure. She takes a deep breath and lets it out in a heavy sigh.

“Rough day?” Octavia asks from behind her.

“Actually,” Raven says as she turns to face Octavia, who has now changed into a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, “no. She was great. Barely fussed and I lucked out, she didn’t puke on me.”

Octavia chuckles as she sits at one of the kitchen chairs, “You did get lucky. She had a rough night.”

“Seems like it,” Raven agrees. “She was pretty tired most of the day, so I just let her rest and gave her the Tylenol. She didn’t eat much though.”

“She usually doesn’t when she’s sick,” Octavia says with a nod.

“Good to know,” Raven says as she lifts her cup for another sip. “Do you want one?” she asks Octavia, gesturing to her cup. When Octavia nods, she Raven turns and grabs another cup from the dish rack.

Raven carries the cup over to the table and sits in down on front of Octavia before taking a seat opposite her.

“Thanks,” Octavia says as she wraps her hands around the mug, “for taking care of her today.”

“Until my classes start, I can watch her on Thursdays if you want,” Raven offers after a moment passes.

“Really?” Octavia asks surprised.

“Yea,” Raven shrugs, “All I’m really working on right now is pre-reading my textbooks and making sure I’m ready. I can watch Cassie and still do that.”

“I don’t want to keep putting so much on you Raven,” Octavia says with a sigh. “You’ve already done so much for us.”

“She’s a good kid,” Raven smiles, “and, who knows, maybe it’ll be good for me.”

“If you’re sure,” Octavia hesitates.

“I am,” Raven nods. She considers her next words before she says, “There was something she asked me today that I wasn’t sure how to handle at first.”

“What?” Octavia asks quietly, shaking her head slightly in confusion.

“Well, after we had breakfast, I asked her what she wanted to do,” Raven starts fidgeting with her coffee mug. “She said she wanted to see daddy.”

Octavia doesn’t say anything but Raven notices how her posture stiffens, and her gaze drops from Raven’s to her mug, still between her hands.

“I wasn’t sure what she meant,” Raven continues, “So I asked her what she meant, and she took me to your room. Cassie opened the bottom drawer of your dresser and pointed to a book. I wasn’t sure what she was getting at until I picked it up. It was a photo album.”

Octavia nods but remains silent, not meeting Raven’s gaze.

“She seemed really adamant about it, so we sat on the floor in your room and looked through it,” Raven explains. “It’s a really nice photo album O. She really seems to enjoy getting to see him.”

“It was something I put together right after she was born,” Octavia answers as she plays with the handle of her mug. “I thought she should have some way of getting to see him.”

“It’s a great idea,” Raven says with a smile. “She should know who her father was.”

“I have some videos too,” Octavia says, reaching up and wiping a stray tear from her face. “I just haven’t shown them to her yet. I….”

“Give yourself time,” Raven says in a soft voice. “You’ll get there, on your own time.”

Octavia finally meets her gaze, her eyes shining with the pain of loss, something that Raven is far too familiar with.

“Now, I do have another very important question for you,” Raven says after a heartbeat passes. “Who the hell designs these thermometers? You have any idea how long it took me to figure that thing out?” she adds waving her hands for extra effect.

“Oh my god,” Octavia blurts out as laughter bubbles from her.

“Cassie had to show me how to use it,” Raven adds, laughing herself. “I design buildings for a living, but one little thermometer kicks my ass.”

“That has got to be the funniest thing I’ve heard in years,” Octavia continues to laugh, trying to cover her mouth to stop them, but to no avail.

“I’m glad someone got a laugh out of it,” Raven says, still laughing.

A few hours later, after Cassie had woken from her nap and after Raven had gotten some studying in, they all sat in the living room together. Raven was on the floor, her leg stretched out in front of her with Cassie sitting next to her, and Octavia sat on the couch behind them. She watched as the two played with the toys Cassie had scattered around.

“You know what we should do?” Raven asks, she’s looking at Cassie but talking to both girls. “We should watch that movie from this afternoon. The one we fell asleep during.”

“Frozen?” Octavia asks then groans, “Not again.”

“Says you,” Raven says turning her head and throwing Octavia a smirk, “I haven’t seen the end yet, or the middle for that part.”

“How far were you when you passed out?” Octavia asks as she snatches the remote from the end table.

“Do you want to build a snowman?” Raven says after thinking for a few seconds.

“Wow,” Octavia chuckles, “you really didn’t make it far.”

“It was nap time,” Raven shrugs.

“Nap time for the toddler,” Octavia jokes as she reaches down and ruffles Raven’s dark hair.

“You never specified,” Raven fire back with a grin.

The movie starts and Cassie crawls into Raven’s lap, the girl making room for her easily. As the movie plays Octavia can hear Cassie trying to sing along, with her limited vocabulary it’s cute. Octavia also notices that Raven is humming along, the best she can do with not knowing the words at all.

Octavia finds that her mid starts to wonder as the movie plays on, scenes she’s already seen dozens of times in the past almost two years.

It hasn’t been a month since her and Cassie had moved into the apartment with Raven, but it almost seemed as though the girl had been a part of their lives for so much longer. She’d fit in to their lives like she’d always been there.

Octavia could remember watching Raven from across the yard while they had all eaten their lunches outside in high school. She’d always sat alone, when there wasn’t an empty table, she’d sit on the grass under one of the large trees in the yard.

Octavia’s lunch time experience had been very different. Her table had always been full, there were even times when they had pulled a second table over just to make room. Her first year at high school, which had also been her brother’s last year, the table was filled mostly with his friends.

Once she was on her own though it hadn’t taken long for her circle of friends to grow, she’d already made it onto the cheerleading squad and most of them sat together, as well as a number of the football players, most of who were dating cheerleaders.

There had been more than a few times when Octavia had looked across the yard and seen Raven sitting on her own, usually with a book in her lap, and had thought about just walking over and saying hi. Just a simple word and hoping a conversation would follow, maybe she’d even invite the girl to join them and force some of the football studs off their table.

Octavia sighs as she looks down at Raven, her and Cassie now humming along with In Summer, and wonders what life would have been like if she’d just taken that one little step.

“You ok?” Raven asks quietly, leaning her head back against the couch to look up at Raven, her head just touching Octavia’s leg, which was tucked under her.

“I’m good,” Octavia smiles, reaching down and running her fingers through Raven’s hair. The other girl closes her eyes at the feeling and after a moment she turns her head back to the movie. Octavia continues to play with the end of Raven’s long hair that still rested by her leg. Octavia can’t find a reason to explain why the simple gesture has become something that eases her mind, but it has quickly become one of her favorite things to do when they’re lounging around in the evenings.

“I’m good,” Octavia whispers quietly, mostly to herself, as the movie continues on.

When the movie finally comes to a close a short time later Octavia can't help but laugh when, as the end credit scene plays, Raven throws her hands up and says, "Now it makes sense!"


	6. Day Thirty-One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter. Hope you guys all like it. It's been a rough week so I hope this turned out alright.

_Octavia sits on the bottom step of the bleaches, Clarke beside her, as they watch the basketball team score yet another point. The game had been pretty much like this since the start, back and forth, with their team outscoring the other by so many points it had stopped being interesting a while ago._

_The only reason they’d stay was because Clarke’s mother wouldn’t be there to pick them up for another hour, so they were basically stuck. Plus, it was pouring rain outside, so they’d vetoed the idea of walking immediately._

_“The only upside to this,” Clarke says as she leans into Octavia, “is that we can at least watch the cute players running by.”_

_“Do you ever think of anything else?” Octavia laughs as she playfully shoves her friend._

_“Not when they’re running past us at eye level,” Clarke laughs. “Like her,” Clarke points as one of their players runs past._

_“Lexa Woods?” Octavia asks surprised. “That’s a hell of a crush.”_

_“First off, I didn’t say crush,” Clarke says sending her a look, “Second, how can you not? Look at her. She’s got this whole knight in shining armor thing going on. Remember how she saved that freshman from getting his ass kicked last week?”_

_“You are something else,” Octavia laughs at her friend. As Octavia continues to watch the game something catches her eyes, or rather, someone._

_Raven was leaning against the far side of the bleaches, just across the court from where Octavia and Clarke were sitting. Octavia can’t help but to the watch the other girl for a moment. Octavia hasn’t been able to explain it yet but something about Raven always seems to catch her off guard and make her forget things going on around her._

_Almost as if she could hear Octavia thinking about her Raven looks up and meets her eyes. Octavia quickly looks away, face flushing from having been caught staring._

_When she looks back up, she sees that Raven is watching her now, a small smile on her face. Raven nods her head once and then turns and head out the double doors behind her._

_Octavia hesitates for a second before telling Clarke, “I’ll be right back,” and heads after Raven before Clarke has a chance to respond. She makes her way quickly around the court and pushes through the doors Raven had disappeared through just moments before._

_The hallway beyond was dark, the only light filtering through the windows from the lights outside. Octavia makes her way slowly down the hall, passing the rows of lockers. She’d been down this hall so many times in the last three years that her feet seem to carry her on their own._

_The farther down the hall she walks the faster her heart starts to beat in her chest. Maybe following a girl, she only knows in passing into a dark, deserted hallway hadn’t been the brightest idea she’s ever had but at this point she’s determined to find the girl._

_As she reaches an intersection of hallways she stops and glances around the corner, nothing there. She sighs, shaking her head at herself for her foolishness._

_As she turns to head back to the gym she nearly runs straight into Raven, who seemed to appear from nowhere. The girl walks straight to her, reaching up and placing a hand on either side of Octavia’s face. Without hesitating Raven leans in and places her lips against Octavia’s, who doesn’t hesitate to return the kiss._

_Octavia reaches down and places her hands on Raven’s hips, pulling her closer and urging the kiss deeper. They stumble in the hallway until Octavia feels the lockers behind her press into her back._

Octavia’s eyes fly open and she sits up in her bed, confused as she takes in the room around her. She was not back in high school, not back in those dark hallways. Part of her dream she remembers as actually having happened but that last part, that had definitely not been something that took place.

“Shit,” she mumbles to herself as she looks over at Cassie’s bed, making sure the girl is still asleep, which she thankfully is. Octavia brings a finger up to touch her lips, which still hums from her dream. Octavia lets herself flop back onto her pillows, reaching up and rubbing at her temples. “What the hell was that about?” she wonders out loud.

Glancing at her bedside table she sees bright glowing numbers; **0414**.

“Great,” she sighs, knowing already that it’s going to be a long day. At this point, if she’s able to sleep, she can still get another half an hour of sleep in before her alarm goes off.

Just as she is starting to drift off again, she hears a thud, followed by a stream of curses coming from Raven’s room.

She hesitates, her lips still tingling from the dream, but when she hears another thud, she throws the blankets back and walks quietly across her room.

Opening and closing the door without a sound, she steps up to Raven’s bedroom door.

“Raven?” she asks as she knocks on the door lightly, “Are you ok?”

“I’m fine,” Raven answers then after a moment adds, “You can come in.”

Octavia opens the door and steps inside; it takes her a second to realize that Raven isn’t in bed.

“What happened?” she asks as she kneels next to where Raven lays on the floor.

“Sometimes my leg cramps up on me in the middle of the night,” Raven explains as she massages the area around her left knee. “Usually I can stretch it out by standing up, but it was really bad, and I fell.”

“Can I get you anything?” Octavia asks, uncertain.

“Um, a glass of water?” Raven asks sheepishly. Octavia nods and stands up, leaving quickly. Raven lets her head rest back against the side of her bed and sighs, still trying to rub the cramp out of her leg.

“Here you go,” Octavia says, returning to the room and handing Raven a glass from the kitchen. “Pain meds?” she asks after Raven takes a small sip.

Raven shakes her head, “I’m good.” The look on Octavia’s face says she’s not buying it and Raven sighs, “Dresser, top drawer on the left.”

Octavia nods and retrieves the prescription bottle from the drawer and sits beside Raven.

“How many?” she asks as she twist the top off.

“Just one,” Raven answers and when Octavia looks at her, she chuckles and says, “Promise, just one. If it stays bad, then I’ll take another one in an hour or so.”

Octavia nods and hands her one of the pills before putting the top back on and setting it on Raven’s bedside table.

Raven pops the pill in her mouth and takes a mouthful of water from the cup before setting it on the floor beside her. “Thank you,” she says as she relaxes back again. “I’m sorry that I woke you up.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Octavia says, “I was awake anyway, but even if I wasn’t, I want to help.”

“I’d prefer that the help wasn’t needed,” Raven chuckles sadly, “but hey, shit happens.”

“You never told me what happened to your leg,” Octavia says as she turns to look at Raven. She watches as, even in the dark room, she sees Raven’s face cloud over. “You don’t have to tell me; I just don’t remember what happened and I think it was before senior year.”

Raven nods, “It was. Right after we started our summer break from junior year actually.”

“Raven,” Octavia says softly when she notices how the girl’s jaw clenches.

“It’s ok,” she says quickly, and with a short chuckle adds, “You might as well hear the rest of screwed up story of my life.”

Octavia doesn’t argue but instead rests her hand on Raven’s leg, just above her injured knee.

“I had just got moved to foster home number three,” Raven starts with a shake of her head. “At that point I was pretty sure they were just moving me every year for the fun of it. It may also have been because I was being ‘just another teenager acting out’,” she says the last part with air quotes. “my new foster dad was a real dick. He liked to drink and knocked the kids around, for fun, at least that’s how it seemed.”

“How could they leave kids in a house like that?” Octavia asks, feeling sick at the thought.

“Too many kids and not enough places to put them,” Raven shrugs sadly. “The system is broken but no one wants to fix it.”

“That’s messed up,” Octavia mutters.

“Yea,” Raven agrees with a slow nod. “Well, one night I came home late, I was out at the library using the internet to check out colleges. He was beating on one of the younger kids, couldn’t have been more than ten or eleven. He turns around and snarls at me, demands to know where I was. So, I tell him, and of course he doesn’t believe me,” she chuckles darkly. “I tell him I don’t give a shit if he believes me or not but that he needs to stop beating the kid.”

“I guess that didn’t go well,” Octavia says in a low voice.

“No,” Raven sighs. “He reached over and grabbed the kid by the back of his neck and told me to mind my own business. I told him if he wanted to beat on someone that he should beat on me instead, and he did.” Raven goes quietly after that and Octavia, not knowing what to say, starts rubbing small circles around the top of Raven’s knee.

“I ended up in the ER with three broken ribs, a fractured eye socket and a shattered kneecap,” Raven says after a few minutes had passed. “They told them I was mugged on my way home from the library.”

“You didn’t tell anyone at the hospital what really happened?” Octavia asks a little surprised.

“They wouldn’t believe me,” Raven shrugs. “They never believe the foster kid. So, I just went with the story. At least they agreed to take me to physical therapy, the state was paying for it so I guess they figured they could drive me.”

“You still had to live there?” Octavia asked, not able to keep the disgust from her voice.

“I stayed with the party line,” Raven shrugs, “and even if I had told them and they believed me, who knows where I would have ended up.”

“God,” Octavia whispers, “That’s terrifying.”

Raven just nods her head in agreement, “Luckily I was healed up enough before school started that no one really knew. I wore my brace under my jeans so all anyone saw was a limp.”

“I remember that,” Octavia nods. “No one was talking about it, so I didn’t think to asks. I’m sorry,” she sighs, “I should have just asked you if you were alright.”

“You don’t need to apologize for something you did when we were sixteen,” Raven smiles at her. “There’s no way you could have known.”

“I could have asked,” Octavia insists. “I was a self-centered teenager.”

“And so was I,” Raven laughs. “All I cared about was making people hurt like I was. We all did stupid shit,” she shrugs. “What matters is what we do now.”

Octavia chuckles and shakes her head, “I wish I could see things like you do.”

“You’re still hurting,” Raven acknowledges. “Give yourself time and you might.”

Octavia shakes her head again, hoping Raven is right but not feeling it at the moment.

“How’s your leg?” she asks after a moment.

“Better,” Raven nods. “I think I can stand up now.”

“Here,” Octavia says as she stands up and offers Raven her hand, “let me help you.”

Raven hesitates before reaching up and taking the offered hand. Octavia helps pull her to her feet and they stand together, Octavia’s one hand on Raven’s hip to steady her and the other still in Raven’s hand. Her hand on Raven’s hip reminds her of the dream that had woken her up and Octavia lets her hand drop.

“We should probably both try and get a little more rest,” she offers as she takes a step back from Raven.

“Why were you awake?” Raven asks after a moment.

“What?” Octavia asks slightly confused.

“When I apologized for waking you up, you said you were already awake,” Raven explains. “Is Cassie sick again?”

“Oh, no she’s fine, she’s sleeping,” Octavia rambles, “I just had a dream that woke me up.”

“Good dream or bad dream?” raven asks with a small smile and for a second Octavia thinks she must know. “because waking up from a good dream is always much fun.”

“Yea,” Octavia agrees with a nod, “good dream. It was a good dream.”

“Anybody I know?” Raven teases as she leans against her bed.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Octavia fires back, then she adds, “Get some sleep.”

“Yes ma’am,” Raven says as Octavia disappears from sight.

**

“You look like shit,” Clarke says when she opens the door two hours later for Octavia, who has a still half-asleep Cassie on her hip.

“Morning to you too,” Octavia mumbles as she walks past Clarke and into the house.

“Someone’s moody,” Clarke smirks as she closes the door.

“I’ve been up since four,” Octavia mumbles as she sets Cassie down on the couch in the living room of Clarke’s parent’s house.

“Cassie sick again?” Clarke asks and when Octavia chuckles she asks, “What’s funny?”

“That’s the first thing Raven asked too,” Octavia says with a small smile.

“Ah,” Clarke smirks at her friend as they head into the kitchen, “So, Raven’s keeping you up at night?”

“Not funny Clarke,” Octavia mutters as Clarke pulls two coffee mugs from the cabinet.

“Holy shit,” Clarke says as she sets the mugs on the counter, “Are you sleeping with Raven?”

“No, of course not,” Octavia shakes her head. “I just had a rough night. Dreams.”

“Like before?” Clarke asks as she pours coffee into both cups.

For months after Lincoln’s death Octavia had been plagued with nightmares, they always varied but they left her shaking and unable to go back to sleep.

“No, not like before,” Octavia sighs. She hesitates then sits down on a stool next to the kitchen counter. “It’s different, it,” Octavia hesitates but keeps going, “I haven’t dreamed about anyone else since…”

“Since Lincoln,” Clarke finishes for her. She pushes one of the mugs in front of Octavia who accepts it with a small smile.

“I feel guilty,” Octavia admits after a pause. “I had a dream about someone who wasn’t my husband and I feel terrible about it.”

Clarke sighs and takes a few short steps until she is standing next to her friend, she gently places a hand on Octavia’s shoulder. “I don’t think Lincoln would want you spending the rest of your life alone, feeling guilty.”

“I know,” Octavia says softly, feeling tears sting her eyes, “I just never thought any of this would happen.”

“I don’t think anyone ever does,” Clarke agrees, tears in her own eyes for her friend. Clarke had felt helpless the day Octavia called and told her about Lincoln, they had literally been on opposite coastlines at the time. Clarke had spent hours on the phone with Octavia and had even managed a few trips out east, like when Cassie had been born, but had never felt that she was able to actually help her friend.

“Look O,” Clarke says with a smile, “Dreams don’t have to mean anything if you don’t want them to.”

Octavia hesitates before asking, “What if I want them to?”

Clarke tries to suppress her smile, “Well then, do I get to know who the lucky person is?”

“You’re insufferable,” Octavia laughs.

**

Raven straightens, her back popping as she does. She’s been standing at her drawing table the entire afternoon, trying to come up with a way to fix the latest problem to crop up with the new building design. The designer wasn’t willing to change his plans so Raven had been forced to try and figure out how to make things so that they could be built safely.

That alone had her irritated, add to it the fact that she hadn’t been able to go back to sleep after her leg had decided to wake her up, and she was not in the mood for dealing with people today. That being why she had closed herself up in her office today.

There’s a knock on her door and Raven growls as she walks over to it. Swinging the door open she is surprised to find Octavia standing in front of her. Any harsh comment Raven was prepared to make dies on her lips when she sees the shorter woman standing in front of her.

“Hi,” Octavia smiles at her with an awkward wave. “I was hoping you were still here.”

“Still here?” Raven asks and she looks down at her watch. “Oh, I didn’t realize what time it was.”

Octavia chuckles, “I thought you’d say that.”

“Come in,” Raven says as she takes a step back from the door, letting Octavia come in.

“You have a great office,” Octavia says as she takes in the room. A desk sits opposite the door, covered in blue-prints and other paperwork. To the right is the large drawing table that Raven had spent the majority of her day at. The one thing Octavia notices right away though is that there aren’t any personal things in Raven’s office. No pictures of her family or friends, nothing to saw that this was her space.

“They just put me in here to keep me out of trouble,” Raven jokes as she walks over to her desk, still a slight limp in her leg.

“How’s your leg?” Octavia asks, walking behind her.

“A little sore,” Raven shrugs, “but it usually is after a night like that.” She lowers herself into one of the chairs in front of her desk and motions for Octavia to take the other one. “So, did you just hang out so you could see my office?” Raven asks with a smile.

“Actually,” Octavia says, suddenly feeling nervous, “I thought we could do something for dinner tonight.”

“We do dinner every night,” Raven chuckles.

“Right, I know that,” Octavia shakes her head. “I meant maybe just you and me could do something for dinner.”

“What about Cassie?” Raven asks quirking an eyebrow.

“She’s with Clarke,” Octavia answers, “It’d been a while since Clarke had seen her, so she offered to watch her today. She’ll bring her home tomorrow after I get home.”

“So, it’s just the two of us tonight?” Raven asks.

“Yea,” Octavia says smiling, then adds, “Unless you don’t want. I can just go home and...”

“Easy O,” Raven chuckles. “I think it’s a great idea.”

“Really?” Octavia asks surprised.

“Yea,” Raven laughs, “and I even know a great place we can go.”

So, an hour later they walk into a small restaurant on some street Octavia doesn’t even know the name of. There are only a handful of tables scattered in front of a small, raised platform that hold a single stool and microphone. A man with salt and pepper hair sits perched on the stool, guitar on his lap, singing.

“What do you think?” Raven asks her, leaning close to be heard.

“I love it,” Octavia answers with a wide smile. They find a small table for two near the back and are greeted by a smiling waitress.

“Hey Raven, welcome back,” the woman smiles at Raven as she hands them menus, “I see you’ve brought a date this time.”

“Not a date,” Raven corrects with a grin, “Roommate.” For a second, she thinks she sees a look of disappointment on Octavia’s face before she smiles at the waitress.

“This place is amazing,” Octavia says to the woman.

“Thank you,” she smiles. “I’m Amanda. My father actually owns the place. Can I get you guys something to drink?”

“Crown and coke,” Raven says, ordering her usual.

“Same,” Octavia says with a nod.

“You got it,” Amanda says then turns and heads off to get their drinks.

“This place is great,” Octavia smiles as she takes in the small space. “How’d you find it?”

“Anya,” Raven nods, “She used to play here on weekends, so I started coming, ended up becoming kind of a favorite place of mine.”

“I can see why,” Octavia smiles. “Sounds like you and Anya spend a lot of time together.”

“Used to,” Raven shrugs, “She’s busy running her own shop so her music kind of fell to the wayside.”

“I know how that feels,” Octavia sighs as Amanda sets their drinks down.

“You two want food menus?” Amanda asks.

“Please,” Raven answers with a nod and Amanda sets two menus on the table.

“Take your time, I’ll be back,” Amanda says before disappearing again.

“You used to play?” Raven asks and it takes a moment for Octavia to realize what she means.

“Guitar,” Octavia says with a nod, “and I sang some, nothing much.”

“Really?” Raven asks surprised, “I didn’t know that.”

“I just did it for fun,” Octavia shrugs as she takes a sip from her drink.

“Why’d you stop?” Raven asks.

“Didn’t have much time after Cassie was born,” Octavia frowns, “Plus I had to sell my guitar before we moved back. Just didn’t have the room for it.”

“You really liked it, huh?” Raven asks, as she watches the light in Octavia’s eyes when she talks about music.

“Loved it,” Octavia nods.

Raven doesn’t say anything after that as Amanda walks up to the table and takes their order. The menu isn’t vast, only a page long so they place their order and small talk while the music plays.

“This guy is really good,” Octavia says after they’d finished most of their food.

“Yea, Chris is great,” Raven agrees.

“Of course, you know his name,” Octavia chuckles. “How often do you come here?”

“Usually ever Wednesday night,” Raven answers, “Chris plays every Wednesday night, so I’ve got to hear him a lot.”

“I can see why you like coming here,” Octavia smiles, feeling like she’s really managed to relax since walking in the door here.

“If you want, we can try to come here sometimes,” Raven offers, then adds with a grin, “Maybe we can get you on stage too.”

Octavia snorts a laugh, “Not likely.”

“Bet I could,” Raven says, a challenge sparkling in her dark eyes.

“You just going to tell Chris to share the stage?” Octavia asks, rolling her eyes.

“Why not?” Raven asks with a grin. “He can’t do a duet by himself right?”

“I haven’t sung for anything more than just fun in two years,” Octavia argues back. “I’m probably rusty as hell.”

“Is there a better way to get back into it?” Raven asks, raising an eyebrow.

“I don’t know,” Octavia hesitates, “maybe.”

“Good,” Raven says, as she finishes off her second drink. “We’ll work up to it then.”

Octavia rolls her eyes and finishes off her drink, leaning her elbows on the table.

“This was a really great idea Raven,” she says after a moment.

“It was your idea,” Raven reminds her, very much aware of how close Octavia now is to her. They’d chosen to sit with their chairs next to each other as opposed to across, so they could both face the stage.

“Going out was,” Octavia nods, “but coming here was all you.”

“True,” Raven smiles at her, draping her arm across the back of Octavia’s chair. “I still give you credit though. If you hadn’t suggested it, I probably would have been at the office all night.”

Octavia sits back in her chair, resting against Raven’s arm, and letting herself fit into Raven’s side, “Good to know I’m saving you from working to death.”

Octavia smiles at her and Raven finds it hard to catch her breath, and not for the first time tonight.

“You definitely are,” she says with she manages to find her voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is always welcomed. You can come talk to me on tumblr; justbecause8108


	7. Day Fifty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Broken down cars and long days at work make it a rough day for Octavia. Luckily for her Raven has a small surprise waiting for her at home.

Ever since the day Cassie had woken up sick, Thursdays had become her and Raven’s day. Instead of taking the girl to daycare Octavia would wake Raven up and she’d go into their room and lay down with Cassie until she woke up.

Today had been no different than any other Thursday Raven’s had in the last month. Raven had made them both breakfast then settled in to do some reading. They would start with one of Cassie’s favorite books, then switch over to Raven’s textbook. It always made Raven laugh when Cassie would ask her to explain something in the large book, usually always pertaining to the pictures and graphs.

After reading, they’d eat a small lunch and head out to the park for some fresh air. Raven wouldn’t admit it out loud, but the routine had become something she enjoyed, plus it was good for her.

It was strange to think that she’s lived in her apartment for as many years as she has and had never been to this park before a few weeks ago. Over the past few weeks Raven had begun to realize there were a lot of things she had been taking for granted the last few years. She’d gotten herself in such a routine with first college and then work, that she had started to miss the simple yet beautiful things around her.

After being at the park for about an hour Raven asks Cassie, “What do you say kid? Want to go get mommy’s present with me?”

Cassie had nodded excitedly, and Raven had gathered up their stuff, putting it all in the backpack she brought with her and headed them out of the park.

Raven walks with Cassie on her hip, having decided not to do the stroller, she wasn’t quite ready to take that step into adulthood. While they usually took a small walk today Raven had a particular destination in mind.

She pushes open the door of the little shop tucked in between larger ones, the little chime above the door ringing as she does.

The store is full of as many different kinds of musical instruments you can think of. Shelves full of the smaller ones and book after book of sheet music line the back wall.

“Jasper,” Raven calls towards the back and is rewarded with the sound of something falling. “Tell me you weren’t sleeping in the middle of the day,” she jokes.

“Raven?” a voice comes from the back of the store, followed a few seconds later by the presence of Jasper Jordan. He smiles at her and shakes his head, “Guess I nodded off.”

“You do know we stopped taking naps when we were five right?” Raven chuckles as she sets Cassie on the floor, making sure to keep hold of her hand.

“Just because you decided to grow up doesn’t mean I have to,” he chuckles back, looking down at Cassie.

“I’m just babysitting,” Raven shrugs. “Do you have it?” she asks, trying to keep the excitement out of her voice.

“I do,” Jasper beams and he ducks back into his office, emerging a few seconds later with a large case. “I tuned the strings and did the engraving you wanted on the back.”

He sets the case on the front counter and pops open the latches, pulling back the top.

Raven smiles when she sees the beautiful guitar sitting inside. It’s an acoustic, classic guitar with a body that starts out dark on the edges and slowly fades to a light tan by the sound hole.

“What do you think?” Jasper asks with a smile.

“It’s perfect,” Raven says in a low voice. With a grin she leans down and picks Cassie up, sitting her on the counter next to the guitar case. “What do you think kiddo? Think mommy will like it?”

“Guitar,” Cassie smiles as she reaches down and gently touches the strings.

“Yup,” Raven grins. “You’ve got all the extra stuff?”

“Right here,” Jasper says as he pulls a small bag out from under the counter.

“Perfect,” Raven beams as she places everything inside her backpack. “She’s going to love it.”

 

**

To say Octavia’s day had been rough would have been an understatement. She’d slept through her first two alarms and had only made it to work on time because today was the day Cassie stayed home with Raven. Once she’d gotten there though, the day had gone downhill even faster.

Octavia had been part way through her first purchase order when her computer had crashed, and she had lost all the information she had already input. She’d called the IT department right away but was told it would be a few hours before anyone could help her. In the meantime, purchase orders would continue to come to her desk, and she’d have no way of getting caught up.

She’d decided to do what she could the old fashioned way, using the calculator on her desk and filling in the purchase orders by hand. It was slow going but by lunch she had managed to make a small dent in things.

Then she’d over cooked her lunch and it had exploded in the microwave, which meant she not only didn’t have lunch, but she also had to spend her lunch break cleaning up her mess.

When she’d gone back to her desk, she found the IT guys had taken it over, in the process they had somehow managed to destroy three of her hand finished purchase orders. Frustrated and hungry she had started to tell them off only to get herself pulled into Sinclair’s office.

He hadn’t yelled at her but did warn her about losing her temper in the office. She would have tried to explain herself, but she knew he was right, it had not been the proper time or place.

She’d finished out her day, still several things behind, and had happily headed home for the day. That would have been great if that was where her day ended, but it had not. She was only a few minutes from home when her car began to sputter and, despite her foot pressing down on the accelerator, her car slowed. Luckily, she was able to get it pulled over and onto the shoulder, where she put it in park and pressed her forehead to the steering wheel.

Tears of frustration burned her eyes and she took a minute to just sit there, before she lifted her head and pulled her phone out of her jacket pocket. Her finger hesitated over her contact list. A few years ago, she knows who she would have called but that had stopped being an option two years ago.

She knew she could call Clarke but, as much as she loved her friend, the girl was not always helpful in a situation like this.

With a sigh she hit a number and put the phone to her ear as it dialed.

A few seconds later she was greeted by a smiling voice, “Hey, I thought you’d be home by now.”

Despite her current situation, hearing Raven’s voice makes Octavia smile, even if just a little.

“Yea, I should have been,” Octavia starts. “Um, my car just stopped.”

“Stopped?” Raven asks, sounding surprised.

“Yea,” Octavia answers, feeling her voice tremble.

Raven must have heard it too because her voice changes and she ask, “Where are you?”

“Couple blocks from the apartment,” Octavia says as she leans forward and reads off the name of the street she’s on.

“Alright, hang tight,” Raven says, and Octavia can hear the sound of movement from the other end of the line. “Cassie and I are on our way.”

“Ok,” Octavia says and ends the call. With a sigh she drops the phone onto the passenger seat.

Back at the apartment Raven stuffs her phone into her back pocket and looks down at Cassie, who’s happily playing with her toys on the living room floor.

“Alright kiddo,” she says, getting the girl’s attention. “We’ve got to go save mommy.”

“Mommy,” Cassie repeats as she sets down her toys and stands up, reaching for Raven.

Raven smiles and scoops the small girl up, making sure she has her keys and wallet, and heads out of the apartment.

A few minutes later Raven spots Octavia’s car, sitting along the side of the road, and leans down to whisper to Cassie, “I see mommy.”

“Mommy!” Cassie exclaims loud enough that Octavia must hear her, because the other woman turns her head in their direction.

Octavia opens her door and carefully steps out of the car, meeting them on the sidewalk.

“Hi baby,” Octavia says as Cassie reaches for her, Octavia reaches out and takes the girl, settling her on her hip. “I’m rally glad to see you,” Octavia says, throwing an arm around Raven’s neck and gives her a kind of side hug, not wanting to squash Cassie between them, “It’s been a hell of a day.”

“I can see that,” Raven mumbles, noticing the slight tremor in Octavia’s voice. “Rough day?”

Octavia barks a laugh and releases Raven, taking a step back, “That feels like an understatement.”

“Alright,” Raven chuckles lightly, “Let’s see what’s going on with your car then.”

“It was fine but then it just, stopped,” Octavia tries to explain.

“Hop in and pop the hood,” Raven instructs and when Octavia gives her a look she says, “What? I am an engineer and mechanic.”

Octavia climbs back into the car, setting Cassie on the passenger seat until they can get the car working again. She reaches down and pulls the hood release, watching as Raven lifts the hood and looks inside.

“Try and start it,” Raven calls to her and Octavia puts the key back in the ignition and turns it. There’s a fast clicking sound but nothing else happens. Octavia can see Raven nodding her head knowingly.

“If I had to guess,” Raven says as she walks over to the open driver’s side door, “you either have a dead battery or a bad alternator.”

“How do we figure out which one it is?” Octavia asks with a sigh.

“Well, I have a battery jump kit,” Raven says as she slides her backpack off her back, “I happened to bring it along.”

“You’re amazing,” Octavia groans causing Raven to laugh.

“Not nearly,” she says as she places the jump kit on the car and connects the cables. She then walks around and opens the passenger door, letting Octavia close her door which had been out in traffic. “It’ll take a minute or two to charge. That’s if it’s the battery.”

“If it’s not?” Octavia asks as she watches Raven pick up Cassie and sit in the passenger seat, placing the child on her lap.

“Then we’ll need to get it towed,” Raven says with a sigh. When Octavia groans again she adds, “I can get it taken to Anya’s shop. She’ll get us a good deal on the parts, and I can do the labor.”

“You’re going to work on my car?” Octavia asks, raising an eyebrow.

“I am a mechanic,” Raven repeats with a lopsided grin.

“That’s what you keep saying,” Octavia grins back.

“Mommy, present!” Cassie yells from Raven’s lap and the girl flinches.

“What?” Octavia asks with a chuckle, looking from Cassie to Raven.

“Uh,” Raven stammers trying to figure out a way to cover up, “Who knows,” she shrugs with a laugh, “Kids, they say the craziest stuff, right?”

“Raven,” Octavia says, drawing out her name and giving her a stern look.

“It’s nothing,” Raven says with a shrug. “Just something I thought you’d like.”

“Raven,” Octavia says again, this time in more of a pleading voice, “You know you don’t have to do that.”

“Well, I haven’t done it because I have to,” Raven says with a smile. “I’m going to check the battery,” Raven says and slides out of the car again, gently placing Cassis back on the seat.

“What have you two been up to?” Octavia asks Cassie who giggles in response. Octavia laughs back and says, “I figured you’d say that.”

“Alright,” Raven says from the front of the car, “try it again.”

Octavia turns the key but still, only the same noise and she groans as she sits back in the driver’s seat.

“Let me double check the connector,” Raven says as she ducks her head down to check something else. After a minute or two pass she comes back around to the passenger side door. “Sorry, looks like we’re gonna have to get her towed.”

“This is not what I needed,” Octavia sighs.

“Let me handle it,” Raven says, phone already on hand and halfway to her ear. “Hey, it’s me. I need a favor,” Raven listens for a second, smiles and says, “Yea, yea. Listen, I need a tow to the shop.” She relays the address and car description to the person on the other end of the line. “Put it on my bill and I’ll be in tomorrow to work on it.”

Raven hangs up and smiles at Octavia, “Tow truck will be here in fifteen.”

“Just like that?” Octavia says disbelief in her voice.

“Luckily I have connections,” Raven grins wider.

Half an hour later Octavia is the first one through the door of their apartment, Cassie resting on her hip, giggling at the faces Raven is making at her as she walks in behind them.

“I swear somedays I wonder which one of you is worse,” Octavia chuckles.

“Hey, I do plenty of adult level things during the course of a day,” Raven defends herself, “I think a little fun is called for.”

“Fair enough,” Octavia says, setting Cassie down as she kicks off her shoes. Cassie copies her and Raven smiles at them both. “What?” Octavia asks when she notices the look.

“She’s a miniature you,” Raven chuckles again. “Just as beautiful,” Raven adds in almost a whisper.

Octavia looks down at Cassie, letting her hair fall across her face to hide the blush that warms her face, “That she is. Blakes have strong genes I guess.”

“That would explain why you and your brother look so much alike,” Raven reasons as they head into the living room. Sitting along the far wall, next to the TV, sitting the guitar, resting in its stand.

“Raven,” Octavia says in a whisper. “is that?”

“Yea,” Raven says with a small, hopeful smile, “that’s your surprise.”

“Raven, I,” Octavia says, unable to find words.

“Go take a look,” Raven encourages, “let me know if you like it.”

“I already love it,” Octavia assures her with a smile to Raven before she walks across the living room. She reaches out and lightly brushes her fingertips against the strings on the neck before gently picking it up. She sits on the very edge of the couch and cradles it in her lap, slowly running her fingers over the strings.

“Mommy,” Cassie says as she toddles over to stand by Octavia, “Sing.”

Octavia thinks for a moment before smiling and placing her fingers on the neck, strumming a few cords, she adjusts her grip and starts again.

“All those days watching from the windows, All those years outside looking in,” Octavia signs softly and Raven feels her breath catch, “All that time never even knowing, just how blind I've been.”

Cassie gasps and says in a hushed voice, “The Tangled song.” There’s no missing the awe in the small child’s voice, making Raven smile.

“Now I'm here blinking in the starlight, now I'm here suddenly I see,” Octavia continues to sing, a smile growing on her face as she watches her daughter sit on the floor in front of her, completely fixated on her mother. “Standing here it's all so clear, I'm where I'm meant to be. And at last I see the light and it's like the fog has lifted. And at last I see the light, and it's like the sky is new. And it's warm and real and bright, and the world has somehow shifted. All at once everything looks different, now that I see you.”

For a split second Raven thinks her heart must have stopped, she’s never in her life heard anything as beautiful as the sound of Octavia singing. She has to force herself to take a deep breath and lowers herself to sit on the couch, close enough to touch Octavia but not.

Octavia plays a few more cords before stopping and glancing over at Raven, an embarrassed smile on her lips, Raven can’t help but glance down quickly before meeting her eyes again.

“I’m a little rusty,” Octavia says, choosing not to say anything about Raven looking at her lips, instead swallowing around a sudden lump in her throat.

“If that’s rusty,” Raven says, surprised by how rough her voice sounds in her own ears, “then you’ll have a record deal before next weekend.”

Octavia laughs but nods, “Thank you, I think you’re a little biased though.”

Raven snorts a laugh and looks down at Cassie, “What do you think?”

“Yay,” Cassie says clapping her hands together. “More!”

“Maybe after dinner,” Octavia says as she looks down over the gift in her hand. She notices something on the back and leans it forward to read it. “You had it engraved?” she asks with a grin.

“You know,” Raven shrugs, acting like it was no big deal. “Just to make sure you don’t forget about me when you make it big.”

Octavia snorts a laugh, but her expression softens as she reads out loud, “Don’t be afraid to make your own music.”

“I know,” Raven says, wincing slightly, “it’s really.”

“Sweet,” Octavia cuts her off with a smile. “Thank you,” she says, and she leans over places a kiss on Raven’s cheek. When she starts to lean back, she hesitates, less than an inch away from Raven. It would be too easy to lean forward and places her lips on Raven’s, the thought causing her to lick her lips without even thinking. She watches as Raven’s eyes glance down to her lips again before looking back at her.

Raven takes a shuddered breath and says, I, uh, I should go work on dinner.” She hesitates briefly before she sighs and leans back, standing up from the couch and heading into the kitchen without another word.

“Shit,” Octavia mumbles under her breath. _Don’t screw this up Octavia,_ she scolds herself.

Cassie gasps again and says, “Mommy said a bad word.”

Octavia chuckles shortly and sighs, “Yea, she did.”

It’d been a long time since Octavia had to try and figure out the subtle hints someone gave off when they liked you, hell, not since high school. Back then it had been easy, teenagers are rarely good at being subtle about anything.

When Lincoln had died, she didn’t think she would ever be able to have feelings for anyone else and there was a little voice in the back of her head that screamed at her that this was wrong. Her dream hadn’t gotten better, in fact they had continued to evolve as the weeks rolled on.

Octavia thought she was reading Raven right, the other girl wasn’t very good at hiding her feelings, at least not around her and Cassie, but now Octavia wondered if it hadn’t just been her own wishful thinking.

While Octavia sits in the living replaying the last few minutes in her mind, Raven stands in the kitchen, her hands on the counter and her head down. She blows out a deep sigh and shakes her head at herself.

“What the hell are you thinking?” Raven scolds herself in a whisper. “She doesn’t need this from you.”

Raven had thought that she’d left her high school self behind a long time ago but from the moment that Octavia had walked into the coffee shop she realized she hadn’t left all of it behind her.

Thinking back Raven can remember what it had been like in high school. During their Freshman Years, there had still been murmurs and rumors about her and what had happened to her parents and her being an orphan. After that though she basically disappeared, she’d become a bit of a ghost that no one even knew was there.

The only exception there had been, of course the staff, but also Octavia. Raven could remember almost every day, looking up from her solitary lunch and locking eyes with her, just for a brief moment. The other girl’s eyes would soften before they slid back to whatever conversation was going on at her table.

For a fleeting second tonight Raven had thought Octavia was about to kiss her, they’d certainly been close enough to, and that was what had made Raven freak. It was something she’s been hoping for over the last few weeks and when it had nearly happened, she couldn’t do it.

What if she was wrong? What if Octavia didn’t feel anything more than friendship for her? She had been the one to lean in though, so maybe Raven was right. Maybe there was something there.

“Wishful thinking,” Raven mumbles to herself as she pushes off the counter and opens the fridge, trying to decide what to make for dinner.

**

A few hours later, Raven was laying in bed, flat on her back and wide awake. They’d had a mostly quiet dinner then Raven had gone off to her room, citing her need to study as a good excuse. In reality she was still freaked out.

She kept telling herself that she was overthinking things and that she just needed time to get her brain back out of the clouds.

Octavia had knocked on her door to let her know that she and Cassie were headed to bed, but other than that Raven been left on her own for the night. Her textbook had sat on her desk, untouched the entire night. She’d ended up texting with Lexa for a while, her friend doing her best to assure her that she hadn’t done anything wrong and that, yes, she was overthinking things and worrying for nothing.

It was a few minutes before midnight when her phone pinged again, surprising her. Lexa would have gone to sleep hours ago and no one else she knows has ever texted her this late before.

Raven picks up her phone, squinting against the bright screen, and see the last name she expected Octavia Blake. Raven throws a look over her shoulder, towards her bedroom door and the hallway beyond before she swipes her phone open.

 **You still up? - Octavia** The message reads. Raven sighs but types out a quick response.  
**Yup. - Raven**  
 **Can’t sleep? - Octavia** Raven chuckles shortly.  
**Nope. You? - Raven**  
 **Same. Are you still in your room? - Octavia**  
 **Yea. – Raven**  
 **Can we talk? – Octavia** Raven hesitates again, chewing on her bottom lip before answering.  
**Yea. Living room? – Raven**  
 **Ok – Octavia**

Raven takes a deep breath then throws the blankets back, grabbing her robe, she heads to the door of her room. Opening it quietly she slips out and walks the short distance to the living room. Unsure exactly what Octavia wants to talk about she decides to take a seat on the couch and wait.

A moment later Octavia appears from the hallway, looking as tired as Raven feels.

“Hi,” she says softly.

“Hi,” Raven answers, feeling like an awkward teenager again. “You ok?” she asks and watches as Octavia chuckles before sitting beside her.

“I think I’m overthinking something,” Octavia sighs, “and I thought maybe we should talk about it.”

Raven feels herself tense up. _Oh boy, here we go. I knew I was reading too much into it_ , Raven says to herself. “Alright, what is it?” she asks, dreading the answer.

Octavia hesitates, turning so that she’s looking right at Raven, their knees brushing slightly.

“I, um,” she starts but then stops. She blows out a breath and starts again, “You remember when I told you about that girl I had a crush on in high school?”

“Yea,” Raven says at length, feeling confused.

Octavia takes a deep breath, hoping she’s making the right decision, and says, “It was you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know!!! Cliffhangers suck!!!! Sorry guys. If I promise to make it worth it maybe you'll hate me a little less for the cliffhanger?


	8. Day Fifty-Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter picks up right where the last one left off. Technically it's the next day since it's after midnight. This one is slightly shorter, only like half a page, but the next chapter is going to still be part of the same day. I hope you guys like it. As always I love hearing from you!!!!

Raven was pretty certain that her heart had stopped, and not for the first time in the last twelve hours. Octavia’s words had hit her ears but were taking some time to process in her brain. Luckily for her, Octavia was waiting patiently for her response.

“So,” Raven says slowly after another moment, “you had a crush on me in high school before you started dating Lincoln.”

“Well, after still too, at least some,” Octavia admits quietly.

“Right,” Raven says, nodding numbly. Back when they had been in high school, this would have been a dream come true for Raven. Now, well, to say it was confusing would have been an understatement. “Why?”

“Why?” Octavia asks, confused. “Why, what?”

“I guess,” Raven says with a sigh, trying to get her words to form the way she wants them to. “I don’t understand why now.”

“Oh,” Octavia says running her fingers through her hair. “I guess just with what almost happened earlier and how upset you seemed after words I just wanted to tell you that. And, I guess I thought I should try and explain that,” Octavia says but stops when her voice catches in her throat.

This causes Raven to look back at her, the pained looked on Octavia’s face snaps Raven out of any confusion she stills feels and she reaches over, carefully laying a hand over Octavia’s.

“Hey,” Raven says in a soft voice, “it’s ok.” She’s trying to reassure Octavia and at the same time hoping she’s right. “Whatever it is, or isn’t, it doesn’t matter. I’m not going anywhere.”

Octavia nods but even in the dark room Raven can see the tears in her eyes.

“It’s just,” she starts and stops again, taking a deep breath. “I still miss Lincoln,” Octavia’s voice is so low Raven has to wonder if she’s meant to hear the words, but Octavia continues, “and I still love him. I know that there’s going to be a part of me that always does, a part of me that will always belong with him, and that doesn’t seem fair to you, or anyone I might try to date in the future.”

“Tav,” Raven says softly and with an understanding smile, “you and Lincoln didn’t go through some nasty divorce and didn’t hate each other or whatever.” Raven can only hope that what she’s saying makes sense and helps the girl next to her. “You were still together and in love and building a family,” Raven notices how, as she speaks, a few tears slip down Octavia’s cheek and she reaches out and wipes them away gently. “That all got taken away in a heartbeat when he died, and there’s nothing fair about that. No one has the right to tell you how you’re allowed to feel about that, or how long you get to grieve.”

Raven lets her hands fall to Octavia’s lap and she takes both the girl’s hands in her own. “If someone can’t understand that, then screw them.” That makes Octavia chuckle. She’s been looking away from Raven this entire time, no letting her eyes find the other’s.

“O,” Raven says quietly and when she still won’t look at her, she says, “Sweetheart, please look at me.” She sees Octavia nod slightly before raising her eyes to meet Raven’s. “Just because you’ll never stop loving him doesn’t mean that one day you won’t be able to love someone else. When the time’s right, you’ll find room for both. Pain like that doesn’t just go away. Eventually, you learn to find a place for it, it’s who you are. It’s not bad or good, it’s just life.” Raven stops and shakes her head, “And if someone can’t love you because of that then you don’t need them.”

Tears continue to stream down Octavia’s face as she listens to Raven, who squeezes her hands and asks, “Do you want to come here?” opening her arms and letting Octavia nearly fall into them. Raven wraps her arms around Octavia and leans them against the arm of the couch as she feels Octavia cry against her chest.

Raven slowly begins running her fingers through Octavia’s hair and feels her start to finally relax against her.

A few minutes later Octavia sniffles, followed by a chuckle.

“What’s funny?” Raven asks softly.

“It’s just I have so much to try and figure out,” Octavia groans, “and I should be sleeping but instead I’m here, keeping you up, crying like an idiot.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Raven says with a small smile, “I’m used to long nights. And don’t worry about your car either, I’ll have it working by tomorrow evening.”

“I still have to get to work tomorrow,” Octavia sighs.

“Well, conveniently I have a car that happens to run like new,” Raven chuckles, “I think we can both manage to get to the office tomorrow. I’ll have Anya pick me up at lunchtime to go work on your car.”

“You don’t have to spend your Friday afternoon fixing my car,” Octavia says as she lays a hand across Raven’s stomach.

“Spending the afternoon with my head under the hood?” Raven asks with another chuckle, “That sounds like my kind of afternoon.” She moves against the arm of the couch just enough to move them into a more comfortable position together.

“Well,” Octavia says as she moves with Raven, so they are now practically laying together on the couch. Octavia would object but the feeling of laying on Raven like this, wrapped in her arms is something she’s not willing to give up. “I sill need to figure out what t do about Cassie’s birthday. That’ll be here before I know it.”

“Two weeks,” Raven says with a nod.

“You remembered,” Octavia whispers in a breath.

“Well, yea,” Raven answers with a smile, “How could I forget?”

“It’s just,” Octavia says then shakes her head, “Nothing. I was going to have a party for her at Clarke’s parent’s house but they’re redoing their pool, so their backyard is all torn up.”

Raven thinks for a few moments before saying, “I can ask Anya tomorrow and see if she thinks her parents will let us use their backyard. It’s huge and they have a pool too.”

She feels Octavia stiffen slightly and then the girl in her arms sits up, looking down at her with a strange look on her face.

“What?” Raven asks, feeling slightly confused.

“You mean the Woods’ place?” Octavia asks sounding almost breathless.

“Yea,” Raven shrugs, “They like to have big summer get togethers anyway. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind hosting a two year old’s birthday too.”

“But, at the Woods’ place?” Octavia says again, a small smile forming, “That’s the place everyone wanted to go when we were in high school. No one ever got to go there.”

“I’ve been there,” Raven smiles, Octavia rolling her eyes in response.

“Of course, you have,” Octavia chuckles as she lays back against Raven again. “I remember the kids at school saying they had their own movie theater in the basement.”

Raven snorts a laugh as they get comfortable again, “They don’t have a theater in their basement. It’s more like a big ass TV with a few rows of comfy chairs in front of it, and it is not in the basement.”

Octavia laughs into Raven’s chest, settling her arms comfortably across her waist, “That’s basically the same thing.”

“It’s not exactly the same thing,” Raven laughs back. When their laughing stops, she adds, “I’ll talk to Anya tomorrow. I’m sure we can set something up.”

“That would be amazing,” Octavia says in a low voice.

“We’ll take care of it,” Raven promises as she hears Octavia’s breathing to start and even out. Before long Raven feels her eye lids start to grow heavy. It had been a strange night, well early morning, and Raven still wasn’t sure where things stood between the two of them but just knowing that Octavia had, at least for a time, a crush on Raven gave her a little hope.

With a deep sigh Raven rests her head atop Octavia and finally gives in to sleep.

**

“Mommy,” Octavia hears through the fog of sleep still hanging around her. The events of a few hours ago were a little blurry but Octavia can feel breathing beneath her and things start to rush back. The last thing she remembers was talking with Raven about Cassie’s birthday.

“Shit,” Octavia mumbles as her eyes open. She’s still laid out on the couch, resting almost entirely on top of Raven, who’s arms are still wrapped around her. Cassie stands next to the couch, a wide smile on her face. “How did you get out here?” Octavia asks her, rubbing her eyes.

The girl’s response was to giggle and pat the couch next to where Raven’s arm was, waking the girl.

“What time is it?” Raven mutters, still sounding half asleep.

Octavia looks across the room to the clock on the wall. 0620.

“Shit,” Octavia says again, this time louder, as she sits up. “We’re going to be late for work.”

“We’ll be alright,” Raven says as Octavia hops off the couch.

Octavia chuckles shortly, “I don’t see how. I have to get me and Cassie ready in less than ten minutes.”

“Or,” Raven says, stopping Octavia with a hand on her wrist, “You can leave Cassie here with me. I have copies of all my work on my laptop, I can just work from home this morning. You get ready and take my car.”

“Wait, what?” Octavia asks, her still foggy brain not sure of everything Raven said.

Raven smiles, standing up, “Take my car to work, I’ll take care of Cassie today.”

Octavia hesitates but then smiles, leans down and places a kiss on top of Cassie’s head, then kisses Raven on the cheek before quickly disappearing down the hall to get ready.

Raven chuckles and sits on the floor next to Cassie, the little girl crawls into her lap and looks up at her.

“Looks like it’s me and you again today kiddo,” Raven says with a smile. “Want to help me try and redesign an entryway?”

“Yay,” Cassie says clapping her hands together.

“That’s my girl,” Raven laughs as she stands up, lifting Cassie with her as she does. Raven walks them down the hallway, Octavia was already in the bathroom getting ready, so Raven goes into her room and sets Cassie down on her bed.

“I’m going to have to take a look at making a better bed railing for you if you keep escaping like this,” Raven says shaking her head with a smile. “Alright,” she claps her hands together once, “what are we going to wear today?” Thinking back on it, Octavia had always picked out Cassie’s outfits in the morning before she would leave. Today she didn’t have time to, so it was going to be up to Raven.

Raven pulls open the top drawer of the dresser and, realizing she’s opened a drawer containing Octavia’s clothes, she quickly closes it, face flushing instantly.

“Right, not that one,” Raven mumbles to herself. She turns back to Cassie, “Help me out kid?”

Cassie laughs, making Raven’s face flush more, _Because of course I manage to embarrass myself in front of the toddler_.

Cassie does throw her a bone and points to a bottom drawer of the dresser.

“Thanks,” Raven smiles as she crouches and opens the bottom drawer. “Ok, so, pants and a shirt. One of those snaps at the bottom things right.”

“It’s called a onesie,” Octavia chuckles as she walks back into the room, pulling her blazer on as she does.

“Right,” Raven laughs, hoping Octavia doesn’t notice the blush on her cheeks. “You’d think by now I’d have the vocab down.”

“We haven’t even lived here two whole months yet,” Octavia smiles as she snatches her watch off her bedside table. “You’re doing just fine.” She hesitates and asks, “Are you sure you’re ok with keeping her today?”

“I’ve got this,” Raven smiles up at her. “Now get out of here before you’re late,” she jokes.

“Ok,” Octavia laughs, bending over and kissing Cassie on the head again. “I’ll see you later munchkin.” Octavia heads to the door of her room but hesitates. “Raven,” she says and when Raven looks up at her again, she says, “About last night.”

“I know, we’re good,” Raven smiles at her again. Octavia smiles, leaning against the door jamb as she looks at Raven with warm eyes. “I’ll see you tonight,” Raven says and Octavia nods before disappearing down the hall. A second later Raven hears the front door open and close and she goes back to look for an outfit for Cassie.

“Holy hell,” Anya says a few hours later when she pulls up to the curb in front of Raven’s apartment. “I didn’t believe Lexa when she said you were shacking up with little Blake and her kid.”

“Very cute,” Raven mutters back. “I’m not shacking up with anyone. Octavia is my roommate.” After their conversation in the early hours of the morning Raven was beginning to wonder if things really had been all in her mind. “You going to help me with this thing or what?” Raven adds motioning to the car seat sitting beside her on the sidewalk.

Anya chuckles but does get out of the car and walk around to the passenger side. She crouches down next to Cassie, who stands beside Raven, holding her hand, “Hi there. My name’s Anya.”

Cassie looks up at Raven who nods then the little girl says, “My name’s Cassie.”

“It’s nice to meet you Cassie,” Anya says as she tries to suppress a smile. She stands back up, smirking at Raven and says, “So, you haven’t mastered the car seat yet, huh.”

“You do know you’re not funny right?” Raven asks with an eye roll.

“Sweetheart, I’m hilarious,” Anya smiles pulling Raven into a quick, one sided hug. “Come on, I’ll show you how these things work.”

A short while later they arrive at Anya’s shop, she’d already had Octavia’s car brought inside and it was waiting for Raven in the corner of the shop Anya usually saved for her.

“I had the part brought over from storage,” Anya tells Raven as they walk into the shop. Raven takes a deep breath, the smell of motor oil and rust fills her nose and she can’t help but smile.

“Perfect,” Raven nods. “I’ll get to work so hopefully everything will be ready by the end of the day.”

“I’ve got one of the kids pack and play in the back office, I’ll bring it out for you,” Anya says as she leaves Raven and Cassie by Octavia’s car. Raven opens the hood and carefully sits Cassie on the edge, holding her in place with one hand.

“Alright,” she mumbles to herself as she looks the engine over. “At least it doesn’t look like it’s going to be hard to get to.”

When Cassie turns and follows Raven’s gaze she points and adds, “See? Right there, I’ll have to take out a few things, take out the old and slide the new one in. Put everything away and mommy’s car will be fixed.”

“Fixed,” Cassie repeats and looks up at Raven with a toothy smile.

“Exactly,” Raven chuckles as Anya walks back over, pack and play in hand.

“Future mechanic?” she asks, raising an eyebrow at Raven.

“Maybe,” Raven shrugs with a lopsided grin. She lifts Cassie from the car and sits her inside the playpen, making sure that Cassie can see her the entire time. She sets about working, easily getting lost in the rhythm of it.

Ever since her senior year, when she had first been introduced to Anya’s shop, Raven has found something almost therapeutic about working on engines like this. There were steps to follow and every tool had a purpose. There wasn’t a question as to what was needed to fix what. Every so often you’d come across something that would challenge you and finding those solutions were victories like no other.

Raven often lost track of time while she was working like this, forgetting to take breaks to eat or even drink. Today it was a bit easier for her to remember to take breaks, every so often Cassie would need something, and Raven would break away to take care of her.

Even while she was working, something Raven always considered a solo thing, she kept talking with Cassie. Explaining to her what she was doing and how each part fit together. During the last break, Raven had let Cassie sit on the edge of the hood as she worked, one hand in the engine and the other holding Cassie up. The girl had babbled along with her as she had explained how changing spark plugs helps keeping the car in good shape.

She was in the middle of explain to her how she was replacing the last cover over the air vent when she heard a chuckle from behind her.

She turns and sees Octavia standing behind her, smile wide on her face, watching her as she works.

“You come to help?” Raven asks, lifting an eyebrow in question and smiling back, hoping to cover up her surprise.

Octavia shrugs, “Just admiring the view.”

Raven ducks her head back under the hood, tightening the last bolt, and hoping to hide the blush she feels on her face.

“Hey baby girl,” she hears Octavia’s voice grow closer and lifts her head to see Octavia walk up to the pack and play. She stops when she sees Cassie and looks over at Raven. “What is she playing with?”

“Fixed end wrench,” Raven says nonchalantly and when Octavia gives her a look she says and settles her hands on her waist she says, “What? I cleaned it with those disinfectant wipes in her bags. She wanted to see it!”

Octavia shakes her head but is smiling. She turns back to the playpen and picks Cassie up, wrench still in hand and joins Raven by the front of the car.

“How’s it look?” she asks curiously.

“Pretty good,” Raven smiles. “I got the alternator switched out, thing was super dead, then I figured I’d do a little work on her, make her run better.”

“What’d you do?” Octavia asks.

“Let’s see,” Raven says, pretending to have to remember and counting things off on her fingers, “Changed the oil, flushed the coolant and replaced it, changed out your air filters and spark plugs and replaced the brakes, they were shot too.”

“Holy crap,” Octavia says in awe. “How much do I owe for all that work?”

“Nothing,” Raven shakes her head. “I covered the parts, which wasn’t that much, and the labor was free.”

“Raven,” Octavia starts to object but Raven holds up her hands.

“Look, you needed it fixed and I’ve been wanting a day at the shop,” Raven says and glancing down at Cassie she adds, “Plus I got to give this one a crash course in fixing mommy’s car.” She reaches over and ruffles the little girl’s hair, earning a giggle in return.

“Well, if you’re not going to let me pay you back for the parts,” Octavia says with a sigh, “then at least let me buy you dinner as a thank you.”

“I think I can do that,” Raven says with a smile. “You want to drive?” she asks, holding out the keys for Octavia.

“I don’t know,” Octavia pretends to hesitate, “I was kind of enjoying driving your car.”

“She is nice, isn’t she?” Raven asks with a grin. “If you’re good I’ll let you drive her again,” Raven adds with a teasing smile.

“Cute,” Octavia says, narrowing her eyes at Raven, who just winks in response.

“If you two are done flirting,” Anya says from behind them, making them both jump, “I’d like to close up and head home.”

“You’re an ass,” Raven mutters at her but Anya just smiles at her.

“And yet you still choose to spend all day here,” Anya says. “One of these days I’m going to convince you to dump your boring job and come work for me.”

“That boring job,” Raven fires back, “is working for your mother. Something she wants you to do, remember?”

“Oh, I remember,” Anya chuckles. “She’s getting over it. Oh, by the way, I talked to her about the birthday party for shorty here and she’s all for it.”

“Awesome. I’ll give her a call tomorrow,” Raven smiles, “and thanks for letting me use my space today.”

“Anytime,” Anya smiles as she hits the button to raise the back garage door. “You kids have a good night,” she adds with a wink.

Raven rolls her eyes but pushes the pack and play into the corner and grabs Cassie’s car seat. She quickly gets it reinstalled in the back of Octavia’s car, earning her a smile from the other woman.

“What?” she asks when she looks at her.

“You’ve just gotten really good at all this,” Octavia shrugs. “It’s cute.”

“That’s twice you’ve called me cute since you got here,” Raven points out. “Keep it up and I’m going to think you mean it.”

“Maybe I do,” Octavia smiles back, causing Raven to laugh and shake her head.

“So, where did you have in mind for dinner?” Raven asks after Octavia had gotten Cassie strapped into her car seat and they were both settled in the front of Octavia’s car. They had decided that, since it was Friday and neither of them had to be at work the next morning, they were going to leave Raven’s car here.

“You’re going to laugh but I did have a place in mind,” Octavia says as they pull away from the shop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come talk to me over on tumblr: justbecause8108  
> I love hearing from you guys!! You're the best!!!!!


	9. Day Fifty-Four Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The second half of their Friday.

“I can’t believe that I’ve never been here before,” Raven says with a smile as she looks around the restaurant and arcade in one.

“I can’t believe it either,” Octavia laughs, “This place was a favorite for everyone in high school.”

“I wasn’t exactly one to follow the crowd back then,” Raven smiles, taking a sip from her glass of water.

“If it makes you feel better, it’s been years since I was in a Dave and Buster’s,” Octavia grins at her, lifting her menu to make a dinner selection. Cassie sits at the end of the table in a highchair, happily playing with her crayons and kids’ menu.

“Half this menu is alcohol,” Raven chuckles as she flips a few pages, looking things over.

“Makes you forget how much the games costs,” Octavia jokes, setting her menu down and leaning towards Cassie. “Do you know what you want baby?”

“Pollo!” Cassie announces with a smile.

“What?” Octavia asks and looks to Raven when she notices the girl laugh out of the corner of her eye. “You know what she just said?”

“She wants chicken,” Raven smiles and when Octavia looks confused, she explains, “She said it in Spanish.”

“Where’d she learn that?” Octavia asked just as confused.

Raven gets a sheepish look on her face then explains, “I tend to read out loud when I’m studying and sometimes, I slip into Spanish without thinking about it. Couple weeks ago, Cassie caught on and so I started reading her some of her books in Spanish. She’s a fast learner,” Raven beams at the little girl, who smiles back before turning back to coloring.

“That she is,” Octavia laughs. “I can’t believe my toddler is learning Spanish.”

“I didn’t think you’d mind,” Raven says, suddenly a little unsure.

“Not at all,” she laughs, “I think it’s great. She should learn other languages. Wish I had.”

“I could teach you,” Raven offers as the waitress steps up to their table.

They place their orders then Octavia says, Well, I might need to learn. Otherwise how am I going to know what you and Cassie are talking about?”

“What do you say pequeno?” Raven asks looking at Cassie, who looks up. “Should we deal mommy here in?”

Cassie looks like she thinks it over for a minute before she shakes her head with a huge grin.

Raven can’t help but laugh, “There you have it. Sorry O, but you heard the kid.”

“Brats,” Octavia says chuckling. They food arrives quickly, and they eat as they continue to talk and joke. When they’re almost done eating Octavia decides to ask Raven something that has been on her mind since they had left the shop.

“How long has Anya been trying to get you to come work at her shop?”

Raven chuckles and says, “Since senior year of high school.”

“And you keep saying no?” Octavia asks.

“I’ve worked there on and off through college,” Raven shrugs, “but when her mom offered me a job working for her, it was too good to turn down.”

“At least she still lets you work at the shop,” Octavia offers. She doesn’t want to push but she can’t help but wonder if Raven is happy where she’s at. Octavia has seen her every day after work and some days she just looks worn out and unhappy. Today, even after having worked all afternoon on her car, Raven had been glowing.

“It’s still fun for sure,” Raven nods.

Before Octavia has a chance to say anything else a song comes over the speaks in the ceiling above them that distracts her and makes her smile. Without thinking, or even realizing she’s doing it, Octavia starts humming along. It isn’t until she realizes that Raven is smiling at her that she realizes and smiles sheepishly.

“I take it you know this one?” Raven asks leaning her elbows on the table and smiling at her.

“You don’t?” Octavia asks, surprise lacing her voice again.

“No,” Raven shakes her head.

“Seriously?” Octavia asks again.

“Seriously,” Raven nods, “Who is it?”

“You don’t know Train?” Octavia asks truly dumbfounded.

“I know what a train is,” Raven smirks, starting to enjoy this back and forth.

“Raven,” Octavia says leaning forward, “we grew up in California. In San Francisco.”

“I seem to remember something about that,” Raven jokes.

“Smartass,” Octavia smirks but continues, “Train is a band from San Francisco. They’re huge, I can’t believe you’ve never heard of them before.”

“Not my kind of music I guess,” Raven says with a sigh and a shrug.

“You’re unreal,” Octavia says rolling her eyes.

They finish their meals then head into the arcade part to try their hands at a few games. They walk for a bit before Octavia decides to challenge Raven to a racing game. Raven happily accepts and takes a seat behind one of the games.

“Want to sit on mommy’s lap?” Octavia asks Cassie who nods. Octavia sits down at the game next to Raven, settling Cassie in her lap before she swipes her game card. The screen in front of them lights up and the game starts.

Part way through Cassie asks if she can drive and, while she steers from sides, Octavia keeps her hands on the bottom most part of the wheel. When Raven sees this her foot comes up off the accelerator and the other car goes flying past her.

The race ends shortly after that.

“Cassie, you beat me,” Raven says looking over at the girl who is all smiles.

“I win,” Cassie laughs and Octavia smiles at her, knowing what Raven did.

“Yes, you did,” Raven laughs, “You drive faster than me.”

They play a few more of the smaller games before Cassie points to a larger one, one with a big screen and two seats.

“You want to do that one?” Raven asks and Cassie nods her head. “Sure,” Raven nods. “What is it?” Raven asks Octavia, who chuckles at her.

“It’s basically a ride,” Octavia explains as they walk up to it. “We sit here and watch it on the screen. The seats move and shake some.”

“Can I sit with Raven this time?” Cassie asks as they take swipe their game cards.

Raven looks at Octavia and when she nods Raven says, “Sure Niño.”

They take their seats, Cassie sitting comfortably on Raven’s lap. When the seats move for the first time, Raven wraps an arm around the girl to keep her in place. At first Raven was worried that the ride might be too much for Cassie but as it continues and the seats move and vibrate the little girl laughs and squeals, clapping her hands together.

“You know,” Raven says after words, as they are walking to Octavia’s car, “I’m starting to think this kid is fearless.”

“It’s terrifying,” Octavia agrees with a nod. “I know one day I’m going to come home, and she’ll be climbing the walls or something.”

“Hmm,” Raven says in thought, “I could probably rig something up so.”

“No,” Octavia cuts her off with a laugh. “No rigging up the apartment walls for the child to climb.”

“I was just thinking,” Raven smiles, “I could put up some rigging and hand holds, padding. You know, make it a safe wall climbing experience.”

“Pretty sure the landlord might not like that,” Octavia chuckles as she unlocks her car and starts putting Cassie in her car seat. “That may have to wait until we buy a house.”

Raven can’t help but smile at the ‘we’ part of that sentence and she thinks that the three of them buying a house could be a fun adventure.

“So, when we buy a house,” Raven says as she slides into the passenger seat with a grin, “I’m allowed to build a climbing wall?”

The surprised look on Octavia’s face when she freezes part way through pulling her seatbelt on almost makes Raven laugh.

When Octavia looks over at her, she shrugs and says, “You started it.”

Octavia rolls her but finishes buckling her seatbelt. Before they pull out of their parking spot though, she flips down the driver’s visor and pulls a CD out from a CD holder attached to the back.

“I’m afraid to asks,” Raven says, as she watches a smile spread across Octavia’s face.

“I’m about to educate you on Train,” Octavia smiles as she turns the car on and slip the disc into the player. Raven lets out a small groan, which she ignores.

The first few songs play as they make their way towards home, but as they onto the freeway a song comes, and Octavia reaches over to turn it up.

“I take it this is an important one,” Raven jokes but Octavia’s only response is to look at her for a quick second, while still singing.

“I’ve been high, I’ve been low,” Octavia sings the chorus.

From the back seat Raven hears, “I been low,” repeated in a little voice. She glances into the back seat and sees Cassie bobbing her little head along with the music. Raven realizes she’s matching Octavia’s movements as she moves along with the beat of the song.

“I’ve been yes, and I’ve been oh hell no,” Octavia sings louder.

“Oh no, no,” Cassie sings, matching her mother’s in volume and excitement.

“I’ve been rock and roll and disco,” Octavia sings as her smile grows bigger than Raven can remember seeing it. “Won’t you save me San Francisco?”

“Save me San Francisco,” Cassie sings and Raven can no longer hold in the laugh she’s been suppressing throughout the song.

“Guess I know why you like this song so much,” Raven says with a nod.

“Used to listen to it at least once a day when we were still living back east,” Octavia nods.

“I can tell,” Raven chuckles, “You had a backup singer.”

“When she was a newborn, I used to tell her all about things back here,” Octavia says with a small smile. “I’d tell her how much I loved it and how I couldn’t wait to get back here so she could see it all.”

“I’m glad she’s finally getting to see it,” Raven smiles. An idea hits her, and Raven says, “You know what we should do tomorrow?”

“What?” Octavia asks as she takes their exit, meaning they’re almost back home.

“Go to Vista Point,” Raven suggest. “It’s just on the other side of the Golden Gate and there’s an amazing view of the city from there.”

Octavia nods, “That could be great. Maybe even go out and have lunch out there. I haven’t really been over the bridge since I got back. Not that I could enjoy anyway.”

“There’s a National Park out there that we could spend the afternoon in too,” Raven suggest. “It’s really beautiful and secluded. You can forget you’re so close to the city out there.”

“Sounds like a great way to spend a Saturday,” Octavia agrees as they pull up in front of their apartment building. She glances into the back seat and sees that Cassie is out cold.

“She worked hard today,” Raven smiles as she watches Octavia. “I’m surprised she lasted this long.”

“You didn’t actually have her working on the car, did you?” Octavia asks as they get out of the car.

“Just a little,” Raven shrugs as she opens the back door of the car.

“Raven,” Octavia sighs as she walks around the back of the car to join Raven.

“She wanted to see how it worked,” Raven chuckles as she ducks inside the car. She quickly unbuckles the sleeping child and lifts her out of the car seat, handing her off to Octavia, who’s standing next to the open door.

Octavia lifts Cassie so that the girl in resting her head against Octavia’s shoulder and wraps her arms around the girl.

“Guess I know what she’ll want for her birthday,” Octavia smiles as Raven closes the back door of the car. When Raven lifts an eyebrow in question Octavia says, “She’s going to want tools so she can be like you.”

Raven’s thankful that the sun had set because she felt her face flush at Octavia’s words.

“Nah,” Raven smiles, “Why would she want to be like me when she has such a kick ass mom to look up to.”

“I can’t take her to work with me,” Octavia says as they start climbing the stairs. “You’ve actually let her see you working, plus I know she adores you.”

“She’s an amazing kid,” Raven sighs. “Hard not to love her.”

Octavia stops short, causing Raven to nearly run into her, at the words. She bites her lip and mumbles a sorry as she starts back up the steps.

“You really had to live all the way on the top floor huh?” Octavia asks, hoping to change the subject.

“It’s the best,” Raven chuckles.

Octavia laughs, “I love Pretty Woman.”

Raven almost stumbles up the last few stairs, “You actually got that reference?”

“Of course,” Octavia says as they arrive at the door to their apartment. “Who doesn’t get that?”

Raven snorts a laugh as she digs her keys out of her pocket, “Lexa for one.”

“Why does that not surprise me,” Octavia chuckles as Raven opens the door and they step inside. “You know that Clarke has had a crush on Lexa since high school, right?”

“Seriously,” Raven laughs, closing the door. “Lexa has been crushing on Clarke since middle school.”

“You know, Clarke will be coming to Cassie’s birthday party,” Octavia says with a grin.

“This could be fun,” Raven nods, already knowing where Octavia’s thoughts have taken her.

“I’m going to get her to bed,” Octavia says, referring to the still sleeping child in her arms, “I’ll be right back out.”

“I’ll be here,” Raven nods and watches as Octavia disappears down the small hallway. She grabs herself a glass of water from the kitchen and sits down on the couch. Everything from the past twenty-four hours begins to replay through her mind.

What exactly had almost happened between her and Octavia yesterday? Had they actually been about to kiss or had that just been wishful thinking on Raven’s part? Then there had been Octavia’s confession about the high school crush. Was she trying to tell Raven she still felt that way?

 _She did say that she’s worried things wouldn’t be fair to me_ , Raven thinks to herself. Then sighs and thinks, _or fair to anyone she might try and date_. So where did that leave things with them?

Raven sighs and lets her head fall back against the back of the couch.

“Everything ok?” Octavia asks, appearing from the dark hallway.

“Just a little tired,” Raven answers, which isn’t a lie, she was tired.

“Well we were up late,” Octavia says, taking a seat next to Raven, “and we did fall asleep on the couch.”

“Both true,” Raven nods tiredly. Octavia surprises Raven when she swings her legs up and drapes them over Raven’s lap, laying down across the middle of the couch. Raven looks at the girl, half laying across her, thinking about saying something, but deciding not to. She shakes her head with a smile and lets her hands rest lightly on Octavia’s legs.

“What kind of music do you listen to?” Octavia asks after a few minutes of them sitting in silence.

“What?” Raven asks, a bit confused.

“Well, I know you don’t listen to Train,” Octavia answers with a grin, “so what do you listen to?”

“Different stuff really,” Raven shrugs, trying to think, “Mostly rock though. Anya is always playing it at the shop and it catches on.”

“Is there one song that you like more than others?” Octavia asks, watching Raven’s face as she thinks, a slow smiling eventually spreading across her face.

“There is this one,” Raven nods, “I think it’s a newer song. West Coast. Imagine Dragons sings it.”

“I have not heard that one,” Octavia admits. “What makes you like it?”

Raven thinks before answering, “I guess it’s because in the song they talk about how messed up they are but that they love this person so much that despite all that, if they give them the chance, they’ll be their west coast, their home.”

“Hmm,” Octavia hums as she thinks about that. “I kind of like that.”

“You know, I spent a semester living out on the east coast,” Raven says after a moment.

“I did not know that,” Octavia tilts her head. “Where at?”

“NYU,” Raven answers, “They offered a cross-country exchange kind of thing. Gave students a chance to spend a little time somewhere new.”

“How’d it go?” Octavia asks.

“I couldn’t wait to come home,” Raven laughs. After a moment she adds, “Which I thought was weird, since I haven’t really had a home since my parents died.”

“What about here?” Octavia asks lifting herself up on her elbows “Isn’t this home?”

“The apartment?” Raven asks and when Octavia nods, she shrugs. “I mean, I guess it is. I live here but, I don’t know.”

“I think home can be a tricky word,” Octavia say, “but it doesn’t always have to be an actual, physical place. Like, for me, when I think of home I think of Cassie,” Octavia chuckles, “or even Clarke. She’s a giant goofball but she’s still my family. So, maybe that’s just what you need to find.”

Raven nods, then rests her head against the back of the couch again, “I can see how that makes sense.” She chuckles then adds, “Guess I can’t expect to live out a song though huh?’

“Is that kind of like waiting for your fairy tale?” Octavia asks with a sigh as she lays back down on the couch.

“I guess,” Raven replies and feels her eyelids start to grow heavy. “We probably shouldn’t fall asleep on the couch again tonight.”

“You’re probably right,” Octavia says, her voice already sounding half asleep. Neither of them move to get up and after another minute Raven’s head bobs to the side and she opens her eyes.

“Right,” she looks to her right and sees Octavia, looking sound asleep, her legs still draped over Raven’s lap. “O,” she says, carefully shaking the girl’s legs, “O, we need to go to bed.”

“Can’t,” Octavia answers, eyes till closed, “sleeping.”

Raven chuckles and carefully lifts Octavia’s legs so she can stand up. Once she is she leans down and gently shakes Octavia’s shoulder. “Come on O,” she says and this time the girl’s eyes open and look at her. Raven feels her throat go dry at the look in Octavia’s eyes.

Octavia nods and slowly gets up from the couch. When she stands, she sway a little sleepily and Raven smiles at her.

“You’re adorable when you just wake up,” the words escape Raven’s mouth before she has a chance to think about them.

A smile spreads across Octavia’s face and she leans forward, resting her head against Raven’s collar bone. Raven’s hand rest gently on Octavia’s waist and she lowers her head to rest against the top of Octavia’s.

“Come on,” Raven says gently after a moment. “Time for bed.”

The walk down the short hallway together, parting when they reach their bedroom doors. The y both hesitate before opening their doors and stepping into their own room. Raven closes her door behind her and leans against in, shaking her head. _What a day_.

An hour later Raven is laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling, the conversation about home still running through her head. She thinks back to how things had been before her mother had gotten sick, before her life had been turned upside down.

She thought about family dinners and coming home from school each day to have her mother there waiting for her. How, when she had been little and had been afraid of a summer thunderstorm, how she had snuck into her parents’ room and laid next to her mother.

She thought about how safe she had always felt, knowing that her mother and father would always be there for her had made her feel safe and loved. She knew that nothing in the world could harm her as long as she had them.

She also thought about how that world had been shattered in what felt like overnight. How that safety and love had turned dark and just how quickly she had learned that those things had just been an illusion. She’d learned quickly that the world was a cruel place and that she couldn’t relay on anyone, for anything.

Lexa had always been a good friend to her, but when things were bad, when she was tossed from one foster home to the next, there had been nothing her friend could do.

Before she had even graduated high school, Raven had become determined to never let anyone close, to never be lulled into that false sense of safety ever again.

Her phone buzzes, making Raven jump at the unexpected noise. She snatches the phone from it’s place on her bedside table and stares at the screen. It’s a text message from Octavia. Raven hesitates before she swipes the screen and looks at the message.

**Are you have trouble sleeping too? – Octavia**

**When did you become a mind reader? – Raven**

**Yesterday 😉 – Octavia**

**Smartass. – Raven**

Raven watches as the little bubbles show up on the screen, showing that Octavia is typing. They disappear but nothing happens. They show up again and again nothing. Raven is starting to worry when finally a message comes through.

**I slept a lot better last night on the couch. – Octavia**

**Me too. – Raven**

**Do you want to come over? – Octavia**

Raven stares at the screen, thinking she must be misunderstanding what Octavia is asking.

**Cassie is asleep but it’d be nice to not be alone or chance falling asleep on the couch again. – Octavia**

**You want me to come over to your room? – Raven**

**If you want. – Octavia**

**You don’t have to. It was just a thought, since we’re both awake. – Octavia**

Raven hesitates, again not sure what to think or do.

**I’ll be right over. – Raven**

_What am I thinking_ , Raven thinks to herself as she swings her leg over the side of her bed and makes her way across the room. Without a sound she opens her door, steps into the hallway and reaches for the doorknob leading into Octavia’s room.

She hesitates, licking her sudden dry lips, and turns the doorknob. The room is dark, with the exception of a small blue night light by Cassie’s bed. Octavia sits with her back to the wall behind her bed and she offers a small wave when she sees Raven.

Raven carefully closes the door behind her and, with a glance at the sleeping Cassie, makes her way over to the full sized bed against the wall. Without a word, she climbs into the bed and sit next to Octavia, her back pressing against the wall as well.

“You ok?” Raven asks quietly, not wanting to wake Cassie up.

“Think so,” Octavia answers equally as quiet. “Over thinking more.”

“Anything in particular?” Raven asks, looking over at the girl beside her.

Octavia nods but hesitates before she sighs deeply and says, “I was laying here thinking that I really liked falling asleep with you last night and how I wish I was doing the same thing now.”

Raven does her best to keep the smile from her face, but it ends up breaking through and she nods, “I know what you mean.” Raven hesitates but then she asks, “Do you want me to stay?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song here is Save Me, San Francisco by Train and I literally could not get it out of my head until I wrote this chapter.


	10. Day Fifty-Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pretty much picks up where the last chapter left off. You get a little more insight to what's in Raven's head here.

It was after midnight and Raven was having a hard time convincing herself that this wasn’t a dream. She was laying in bed, not her bed either, with Octavia laying next to her, resting her head on Raven’s shoulder.

They hadn’t spoken much since Raven had asked if Octavia wanted her to stay, Octavia had simply nodded in response. They’d sat for a few moments before Raven asked if Octavia wanted to lay down, she knew the other girl had to be tired after the long day.

Octavia had agreed and they’d laid down together on the bed, Octavia resting against Raven and whispering a quiet, “Is this ok?” as her head had found its way to Raven’s shoulder. Raven had nodded and so they found themselves like this, Raven still thinking she must be dreaming.

Octavia had been tracing patterns on the center of Raven’s stomach ever since. It was distracting but definitely in a good way.

“What were you over thinking?” Raven finally asks into the darkness. She feels Octavia takes a deep breath and let it out in a small huff.

Octavia takes a moment before answering, “Cassie.”

Raven’s eyes immediately drift to where the little girl lays in bed, deep in sleep.

“What about her?” Raven asks confused.

“What if I’m not a good mother?” Octavia asks in a small voice. “What if I can’t do this on my own and she ends up hating me?”

“That little girl adores you,” Raven answers, “You’re doing an incredible job with her. She’s a lucky girl to have you for a mother.”

“She’s barely two,” Octavia sighs, “I still have a long time to mess things up.”

“O,” Raven breaths, her arm under Octavia comes up and wraps around the girl. “You’re worried things will be like they are with you and your mother?”

“Don’t get me wrong,” Octavia defends, “I love my mom and all, it’s just, sometimes I feel like I’m the forgotten child.”

“So, it wasn’t just my imagination back then,” Raven says, “She did stop showing up to things after your brother graduated.”

“Yea,” Octavia nods against Raven’s chest. “Once he started college, she put all her focus into his sports there. It was like she forgot she had a second child.”

“I can’t imagine,” Raven says as she runs her fingers up and down Octavia’s bare arm, “ever being able to forget about you.”

Octavia smiles into the fabric of Raven’s shirt, “I think you’re a little bit bias.”

“Bias?” Raven says looking down at the girl in her arms. “How am I bias?”

“Seriously?” Octavia asks with a chuckle. “How are you not?”

Raven thinks for a minute on that then shrugs, “You might be right.” Octavia chuckles again and Raven adds, “Just because you’re right doesn’t mean that I’m wrong. I can’t imagine ever being able to forget about you.”

“Hmm,” Octavia hums, sounding sleepy now, “If you were this much of a smooth talker back in high school, I don’t see how I would have stood a chance if we would have talked.”

Raven chuckles as she starts tracing patterns on the bare skin of Octavia’s arm, “I wasn’t. In fact, I think I barely talked to anyone in high school. Not to mention that if I’d actually talked to you in high school, I probably would have been too nervous to speak.”

“I made you nervous?” Octavia asks and Raven can hear the smile in her voice.

“Extremely,” Raven answers and she feels Octavia relax against her, her breathing evening out.

“Why?” the girl asks, on the very edge of sleep.

“You really don’t know?” Raven asks but only gets a sleepy hum from beside her. “I had the biggest crush on you back then,” Raven finally admits out loud. There is silence followed a few moments later but the quiet snores of the sleeping girl beside. Raven chuckles slightly and sighs, “Yes, we’ll talk about that later.”

**

Raven wakes up slowly, her eye lids still feel heavy and she knows she isn’t ready to get up just yet. She stretches her arms out and is surprised when she realizes she can’t stretch all the way out. There’s a weight on her right arm and she opens her eyes.

She startles for a second when her eyes open and she’s looking at a head of black hair. She takes a deep breath, events from last night flooding back into her mind and she lets out a breath.

 _Right_ , she thinks to herself, _I fell asleep in here last night_.

She rolls over onto her back, her right arm still under Octavia. They must have fallen asleep like that again. _Two nights in a row_ , Raven shakes her head at herself. _What am I doing?_

“Qué demonios es lo que me pasa?” Raven mumbles out loud. Octavia doesn’t move at all and Raven glances over to see Cassie looking over at her, big smile on her face.

Shaking her head with a smile, Raven uses her free hand to wave at the girl, who bounces on her bed in response. Raven huffs another laugh, and carefully slides her out from under Octavia. She hesitates a moment, looking back at Octavia’s sleeping form, then gets out of the bed, walking over to Cassie.

“Buenos dias, mani,” Raven says as she crouches down and picks up the girl.

“Buenos dias,” Cassie says back in that cute toddler voice, making Raven smile wider.

She heads out of the room, quietly closing the door behind her. Even though they hadn’t been up nearly as late last night as they have in the past, Raven knew Octavia needed the sleep.

Raven walks to the bathroom, sitting Cassie on the counter and holding her there with one hand, as she grabs the little girl’s toothbrush. She expertly manages to twist off the cap of the tooth paste and squeeze out just enough before handing it to Cassie.

Cassie hold her toothbrush at the ready but waits until Raven has her own toothbrush ready. With a nod she starts brushing her teeth, Cassie following suit. Raven hums as she brushes her teeth, her own way of making sure she does the full two minutes, and Cassie wiggles along with the tune, Raven’s hand in place making sure the girl stays safe.

The pair set about their morning routine as they have for the past several Thursdays, despite today being Saturday. They make breakfast, Raven leaving a plate of food for Octavia in the microwave, then start on some reading. They get part way through the next chapter of Raven’s textbook before switching over to one of Cassie’s.

Before they finish the book however Cassie looks up at Raven, who stops reading and looks down at the girl.

“Sing?” Cassie asks and she points to Octavia’s guitar sitting in the corner of the living room.

“Maybe when mommy gets up,” Raven tells her.

“But I want Raven to sing,” Cassie says in a sad voice.

Raven sighs but nods, “Alright short round.” Raven careful gets up and grabs the guitar, sitting back down on the couch next to Cassie. She settles the guitar across her lap and runs her fingers over the strings, it’d been years since she’d played, and she hoped she remembered how.

“Arrorró mi niño, arrorró mi sol, arrorró pedazo, de mi corazón,” Raven sings in a low voice. The song bringing back memories as her fingers run along the strings. “Este niño lindo, ya quiere dormir; háganle la cuna, de rosa y jazmín. Háganle la cama, en el toronjil, y en la cabecera, pónganle un jazmín, que con su fragancia, me lo haga dormir.”

“Arrorró mi niño, arrorró mi sol, arrorró pedazo, de mi corazón. Esta leche linda, que le traigo, aquí, es para este niño, que se va a dormir,” Raven feels tears sting her eyes but when she looks over and sees Cassie watching her with wide eyes and awe she can’t help but smile. “Arrorró mi niño, arrorró mi sol, arrorró pedazo, de mi corazón. Este lindo niño, se quiere dormir... cierra los ojitos, y los vuelve a abrir. Arrorró mi niño, arrorró mi sol, duérmase pedazo, de mi corazón.”

The song comes to an end and Raven sets the guitar down on the couch, letting Cassie crawl into her lap.

“That was beautiful,” Octavia says from the end of the hallway, making Raven jump slightly.

“I thought you were still sleeping,” Raven says with a sigh as she rest back against the couch.

“I was,” she nods. “Been awake for a few minutes and I heard you singing.”

“Uh, yea,” Raven says with a nod. “She wanted a song and, well, that was one my mother used to sing to me when I was a kid.”

“It was beautiful,” Octavia repeats as she sits down beside Raven, “I didn’t understand it, but it was beautiful.”

Raven laughs but nods, “I guess you wouldn’t.” She thinks for a moment then clears her throat and starts the song again, “Hush-a-bye my baby, Hush-a-bye my sun, Hush-a-bye oh piece of my heart. This pretty child, Wants to sleep already, Make him a cradle of rose and jasmine.” Raven sways a little as she sings, Cassie swaying with her as she does, “Make him a bed, On the lemon balm, And at the head, Put jasmine, With its fragrance, To put him to sleep for me. Hush-a-bye my baby, Hush-a-bye my sun, Hush-a-bye oh piece of my heart.”

“At least that’s the just of it,” Raven smiles back down at Cassie, who claps her excitement.

“Raven,” Octavia says in a low voice. She swallows over the lump in her throat, “you’re amazing.” She leans over and places a soft kiss on Raven’s cheek.

“Well,” Raven says, clearing her throat nervously, not sure how much from last night Octavia remembers and how much she doesn’t. “I try my best,” she throws on her best smug smile.

Octavia rolls her eyes at her but laughs, “How long have you two been up?”

Raven shrugs, “Long enough to make breakfast, there’s a plate for you in the kitchen, and basically get ready for the day.”

Octavia glances down at Cassie in Raven’s lap, realizing the girl is dressed for the day.

“Raven, if you keep spoiling me like this,” Octavia says as a smile crosses her face, “I might just get used to it.”

Raven laughs, “That’s kind of the idea.” When Octavia looks confused Raven explains, “You don’t have to do things on your own anymore, Tav.”

Octavia’s features soften and her smile returns, “I’m going to eat and get dressed. What do we still need to get together before we leave?”

“Nothing,” Raven shrugs and point to a bag by the front door. “Cassie and I already packed everything.”

“We packed,” Cassie echoes Raven with a smile. “Mommy, we’re going to the para Descanso.”

“Forrest,” Raven translates with a grin. “She really does learn fast, huh?”

“Her brain is a sponge, I swear,” Octavia smiles as she leans forward and places a kiss on the top of Cassie’s head. “I’ll be ready in a couple of minutes,” Octavia smiles then heads down the hallway and back to her room.

After she hears the door close Raven looks down at Cassie and asks, “Am I spoiling you two?”

Cassie shakes her head with a laugh and wiggles off of Raven’s lap and heads over to where her toys are piled in the corner. She grabs the toy guitar Raven had won for her at Dave and Busters the previous night. She brings it back over to Raven and starts pretending to play, she looks to Raven with a smile.

“Alright, you’ve got it,” Raven smiles as Cassie starts singing and she sings along.

“Paw Patrol, Paw Patrol; We'll be there on the double, Whenever there's a problem, 'Round Adventure Bay,” Raven and Cassie sing together as Cassie continues to strum her toy guitar and dance back and forth, “Ryder and his team of pups, Will come and save the day!”

Raven hears laughter coming from behind her and she turns and sees Octavia standing at the end of the hallway, watching them and laughing.

“What’s so funny?” says asks fighting a smile at the sight of the other woman.

“You were singing the theme song for Paw Patrol,” Octavia says. A smile of her own pulling at the corners of her mouth.

“No I wasn’t,” Raven tries to challenge, despite knowing full well she was, then she sighs and goes, “Maybe, ok, whatever, I was. What’s your point?” she asks with a fake huff of annoyance.

“I was just thinking how, about two months ago, you hadn’t even heard of Paw Patrol,” Octavia smiles and when Raven rolls her eyes she laughs, “You asked!”

**

A few hours later the three of them walk back into the apartment, soaked to the bone and exhausted.

“I guess the next time we decide to go for a walk in the woods we should check the weather first,” Raven sighs as she kicks off her soaked sneakers.

“Probably a good idea,” Octavia huffs as her shoes squeak on the floor as she closes the door. “I think we’re all going to look like prunes tonight.”

Raven kneels in front of Cassie, “At least you’ll be a cute prune.”

“What’s a prune?” Cassie asks as Raven pulls her shoes off.

Raven thinks a moment on how best to answer that, “It’s a wrinkly fruit. Look at your fingers.”

Cassie holds her hands up in front of her and gasps, “My hands are prunes!”

Octavia chuckles behind them as she kicks off her own shoes, “You two are quite the pair.”

“Yea,” Raven says with a smile to Cassie, “We’re awesome.” She holds her hand up and Cassie happily slaps it with a high five.

Octavia laughs as she walks past them, heading towards the hallway leading to their rooms, Cassie quickly moving to toddle behind her.

“Let’s get changed and work on dinner,” Octavia says with a smile, she pulls the lightweight flannel off she had decided to wear out today.

 _Jesus_ , Raven thinks to herself as her mouth goes dry at the sight of Octavia standing there, now wearing just a white tank top and jeans. Thanks to the rain her clothes are fitting a little tighter than normal, and Raven’s mind immediately goes places she knows it shouldn’t.

They’d fallen asleep together now two nights in a row, and it was nothing for them to share the occasional light touch on the arm when they were working together on dinner or cleaning up after. Raven wouldn’t lie and say that she hasn’t thought about what it would feel like to let those touches linger just a little bit or even what it would be like to run her fingers over the soft surface of Octavia’s bare shoulder. Raven swears the girl only ever wear tank tops to bed.

“Rae,” Octavia says, a smile pulling at the corner of her mouth. When Raven’s eyes meet her the smile spreads, reaching Octavia’s eyes, “You ok?” she asks in a voice that makes it clear she knows exactly where Raven’s thoughts had gone.

“Yea, I’m great,” Raven says, forcing herself to smile. “We should probably all get changed into dry clothes.” She starts to walk past but Octavia reaches out and gently places a hand on Raven’s arm.

“Rae,” Octavia says her name in a whisper. “I’m sorry.”

Raven startles, “For what?”

“Making you uncomfortable,” Octavia offers, her voice still low. “I wasn’t thinking,” she adds, looking down at the floor.

“You don’t make me uncomfortable,” Raven huffs out a laugh. “I just, um,” Raven hesitates and chuckles nervously, “You make me, uh, feel like a teenager again. I think about things I haven’t in a long time.”

“Good things I hope,” Octavia asks, looking back up, a small smile on her face.

“Very good things,” Raven answers with a nod and returned smile. “Let’s get changed and make dinner.” With a nod they part ways and head into their rooms.

An hour later, after giving up trying to figure out what they wanted to make for dinner and just ordering Chinese delivery, they all sat in the living room. Cassie had eaten her dinner and promptly passed out, now sleeping quietly on the far end of the couch.

“She’s such a light weight,” Octavia chuckles as she walks back to the living room after putting their plates in the sink.

“To be fair, we did do a lot today,” Raven sighs tiredly

“That we did,” Octavia says as she takes a seat next to Raven, who was curled up against the opposite end of the couch from Cassie. “That run back to the car in the rain was both exciting and terrible.”

“I was not expecting that,” Raven agrees, “I could barely see far enough ahead of us to find the car.”

“It’s going to take a month for my car to dry out,” Octavia chuckles.

“I would have brought towels if I’d known we were going to go land swimming,” Raven sighs.

“Land swimming?” Octavia lifts an eyebrow in question.

Raven thinks a moment and starts chuckling, “I have no excuse for that. That was just bad.”

“It was cute,” Octavia tries and defends, chuckling, but when Raven gives her a look she concedes and laughs, “Yea, that was pretty bad.”

When their laughter fades Octavia sighs and rest herself against Raven’s side, Raven lifting her arm, letting the girl get as close as possible. They settle into their end of the couch together, as has become a habit for them of late.

“Can I ask you a question?” Octavia says, several minutes later.

“Sure,” Raven says simply.

“What kinds of things have you been thinking about?” Octavia asks.

“What do you mean?” Raven asks, confused.

“Earlier,” Octavia starts, her voice sounding unsure, “You said that lately you’ve been thinking about things you haven’t in a while. What kinds of things?”

“Ah, that,” Raven sighs. “Well, it’s just things like, wondering if I’ve actually been happy with what I’ve been doing with my life. When I was a kid, I used to think I wanted things like a family and owning a house and all that.”

“And you, what, forgot you wanted all that?” Octavia asks as she starts playing with the fabric of Raven’s shirt.

“Not so much forgot,” Raven shrugs, “More like I convinced myself I didn’t want it anymore. Told myself that I wanted to be this big time, important businessperson instead. That having a family wasn’t something I needed.”

“What about now?” Octavia asks, with just the hint of worry lacing her voice.

Raven smiles slightly, “The last almost two months has been pretty incredible.” Raven hesitates but nods to herself and adds, “If this is what life with a family is like, well, I want that. I want this.”

Octavia lets out a breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding.

“I’m glad you like being part of our little family,” Octavia says, smiling widely.

Raven tightens her arm around Octavia, giving the girl a reassuring squeeze to her side, “I’m really happy you let me be part of your little family.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one took so long. It wasn't a planned chapter and, thus, its a little shorter. The story should start moving along from here though. Please hang in there with me, and let me know what you think!


	11. Day Sixty-Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Cassie's birthday!!!!!! Party time with the kiddos and there maybe some flirting adults lurking around haha.

“So, you and Octavia seem to be getting along well,” Lexa says from beside Raven . They’re standing in front of the island in Lexa and Anya’s parents’ house while Raven finishes cutting vegetables for a veggie tray. She’d been the one to forget it, so it was only fair that she was the one cutting the fresh stuff they’d managed to find in the fridge.

“Leave it alone Lexa,” Raven mumbles as she slices through a carrot.

“You don’t need to get grouchy,” Lexa sighs, “and you don’t have to take it as a bad thing either. I meant it in a good way.” Lexa shrugs then adds, “You guys have this cute, little family thing going on.”

“Lex,” Anya says walking into the kitchen, their mother behind her, “Lay off Raven. She’s doing a good job of playing family.”

“Oh my god,” Raven mumbles under her breath, setting the knife down on the cutting board. “I’m not playing family.” Raven looks out the window above the sink, to where Octavia is crouched down, talking with Cassie.

Raven had worked out most of the party with Lexa’s mother over the last two weeks and had been over the last few days getting things set up. There was a small bounce house, they’d gone with the one designed for kids up four, a ball pit and water coloring station. There were also tables of food and one set aside just to hold the birthday cake.

While the larger pool was still currently covered, they’d uncover it this afternoon after food, there was a small ‘splash’ pool that had less than a foot of water in it.

Raven sighs and looks at Mrs. Woods, “Can you please call them off?”

Mrs. Woods chuckles at the girls, “They stopped listening to me years ago.”

“Thanks mom,” Anya says with a wink. “But let’s be fair, you’re enjoying have another kid around.”

“I have been hoping for more grandchildren,” she answers with a smile and a nod.

“Crap,” Lexa mutters, “Can we go back to giving Raven a hard time please?”

“Oh no,” Raven laughs, “It’s your turn.”

Raven goes back to cutting vegetable as Anya and her other give Lexa a hard time about settling down and having kids. Not that either of them expected her to, Lexa had made it clear years ago that she wanted to focus on her career and nothing else.

By the time Raven has finished cutting the vegetables a few of the guests had already arrived. Octavia had been concerned, she hadn’t made friends since she’d returned home, and the few people she did know from work didn’t have children.

It had worried Raven as well, they could put all kinds of things in the backyard for Cassie to play with, but if no other kids showed up she’d be on her own. What Raven hadn’t realized, at least not until yesterday when she had voiced that fear to Mrs. Woods, was that the older woman had already invited everyone with children that worked with them. Everyone from Cassie’s daycare basically, and most of them had planned to attend.

“You’re spacing out again,” Lexa mumbles as she steps up next to Raven, who had been absentmindedly staring out the small window over the sink.

“Am not,” Raven answers back looking down at her hands resting on the edge of the sink.

Lexa gives her a worried look and Raven sighs loudly, turning her back to the window and leaning against the counter. “I was just thinking, that’s all.”

“Mhmm,” Lexa smiles at her. “Just make sure that you’re not getting in over your head. Taking on this whole family thing, well, it can be a lot.”

“I’m not taking on the family thing,” Raven shakes her head. “I know what I’m doing.”

Almost as if Raven’s words had summoned her, Cassie comes running into the house, giggling. As she gets closer to Raven, she throws her arms up and shouts, “Momma, come play!!” The small girl wraps her arms around Raven’s legs and Raven feels herself go stiff.

 _Did she just call me?_ Raven starts to question in her head but stops, shaking her head clear. At first Raven wasn’t sure if Cassie had actually just called her momma or if, buried somewhere in the back of her mind, Raven had wanted her to. Biting her lip Raven chances a look at Lexa, the other girl is wearing a huge, I told you so, smile on her face.

“Shut up,” Raven mutters at her and crouches down next to Cassie. The little girl is smiling wide at her and Raven lifts an eyebrow in question. “Did you do that on purpose?” she asks Cassie, who’s smile grows. Raven chuckles, “Of course you did.”

Raven jumps slightly when she feels her phone buzz in her back pocket. She wraps an arm around Cassie and stands up, pulling her phone from her pocket as she does.

Clarke just texted me and said she’s out front. I told her to go to the front door and ring the bell. 😉 – Octavia

On que the front doorbell rings and Raven looks at Lexa.

“Get the door?” Raven asks as she sits Cassie on the counter, “I’ve kind of got my hands full here.”

“Hands full, not doing the family thing,” Lexa chuckles as she pushes off the counter and heads for the front door.

“Wanna watch something funny?” Raven asks Cassie, who nods earnestly. She picks the girl up and walks into the hallway, just far enough to watch as Lexa swings open the door.

Lexa is halfway through her welcome speech when her voice catches, and even from here Raven swears she can hear Lexa’s jaw drop.

There’s a moment of silence then Lexa manages to stumble, “Clarke. You’re Clarke Griffin.”

“Lexa Woods,” Raven hears Clarke say and can hear the sly smile on the blonde girl’s face.

“I haven’t seen you since,” Lexa starts but Clarke finishes.

“High school, yea,” Clarke nods.

Ravens watches for a moment as the two just stare at each other then Lexa clears her voice.

“So, um, why are you here?” Lexa asks, just a touch of confusion to her voice.

“I was invited,” Clarke answers with a soft laugh. At that Cassie squirms out of Raven’s arms and runs to the door.

“Aunt Clarke!” she calls as she reaches the blonde, who leans down and catches her easily.

“Hey there brat,” Clarke laughs as she settles Cassie on her hip. “Happy Birthday.”

“Hi, Clarke,” Raven says as she walks up to the two. “Glad you could make it.”

“Of course, I made it,” Clarke answers. “No way was I going to miss this kid’s birthday,” Clarke adds as she tickles Cassie causing the girl to giggle and squirm.

Lexa shoots Raven a glare, to which Raven just shrugs and smiles.

“I’m going to go make sure we’re all set up out back,” Raven says with one last grin in Lexa’s direction before turning and heading through the house and into the back yard.

“What an ass,” Lexa mumbles under her breath before turning back to Clarke, “Come on in. Pretty much everyone is out back.”

An hour later Clarke walks up to Octavia, who is carefully placing the candles on the birthday cake, making sure not to mess up the Paw Patrol picture, per Cassie’s request.

“So, is there a reason you didn’t bother to tell me you were having the party at Lexa’s house?” Clarke asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Pay back,” Octavia says with a sly grin. When Clarke huffs beside her she adds, “You’ve had a crush on Lexa since high school. Here’s your chance.”

“Right, at a two year old’s birthday party,” Clarke bites back.

“Why not?” Octavia challenges back. “You never know, she might just say yes.”

“Why do I feel like you’re up to something?” Clarke asks, quirking an eyebrow at her friend.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Octavia lies, she and Raven had discussed it at length the night they realized their two best friends had crushes on each other.

“You’re so full of shit,” Clarke laughs.

“Watch your mouth,” Octavia scolds her, “There are children here you know.”

“Speaking of,” Clarke says looking around at the dozen or so toddlers running around, “Where did all these kids come from?”

Octavia nods as she looks around the yard, full of kids and parents, “Apparently Mrs. Woods wanted to make sure there were plenty of kids here. Invited everyone from daycare.”

“Gives Cassie kids to run around and play with,” Clarke shrugs then spots Raven across the yard just as Cassie runs over to her and asks her something with a wide grin. Raven crouches down, smiling as she answers the girl. “You three make a cute family,” Clarke adds as Cassie runs off again.

“We’re not a family,” Octavia says with a sigh. As much as they may act like it Octavia keeps reminding herself that her and Raven are still just friends. Sure she’s never had a friend she’s been this close with, not even Clarke, but that just change the fact that they were still friends. “We’re just, roommates, friends.”

“Uh ha,” Clarke says as her gaze drifts back to where Raven stands, talking with another parent. “Then it won’t bother you that Bethany’s mom is flirting with Raven.”

“She’s what?” Octavia asks, following Clarke’s eyes until they land on Raven. Raven, who is talking with a blonde that Octavia can only describe as beautiful. The woman laughs at something Raven says and lightly lays her hand on Raven’s upper arm. Raven gives an awkward smile and chuckles the touch off.

Octavia feels herself flush and immediately looks away, “Raven can flirt with whoever she wants to. Doesn’t matter to me.”

“Clearly,” Clarke mutters, earning her a glare from Octavia. “Just saying. If you’re trying to convince yourself that it doesn’t bother you, then you might want to try not throwing daggers at the blonde.”

Octavia clears her throat and fuses with the plate and silverware on the table, “I’m not throwing daggers. I’m just, ouch,” Octavia says as she cuts her finger on the knife meant to cut the birthday cake. “Son of a bitch.”

“Language,” Clarke smiles but grabs a cloth off the table and wraps it around Octavia finger. “Let’s go inside and take care of this.”

“I’m fine,” Octavia insist as Clarke leads her back inside and to the kitchen sink.

“Doesn’t look fine,” Clarke says, reaching over and turning on the sink. “If you hadn’t been so distracted being jealous.”

“I wasn’t jealous,” Octavia fires back.

“Who’s jealous?” Lexa asks, walking into the kitchen. Her eyes travel from Octavia to Clarke then down to their hands in the sink, stopping on the sight of blood dripping from Octavia’s finger.

“Octavia,” Clarke answers with a smug smile. “A hot blonde is flirting with Raven.”

“Really?” Lexa asks, lifting an eyebrow and walking over, looking out the window over the sink. “Oh yea, wow, the blonde is really trying hard too.”

“God, I hate you two so much right now,” Octavia says, not meaning any of it.

The pair roll their eyes at the same time and share a look when they realize what they’d just done and both start laughing.

“Now I think I’m going to be sick,” Octavia mumbles as the cool water flows over the cut, the nausea having nothing to do with her hand.

“Don’t mind her,” Clarke says looking at Lexa with a smile, “She likes to be dramatic.”

“I’ll go grab the first aid kit out of the upstairs bathroom,” Lexa offers while trying, and failing, to suppress a smile.

“You choose now to flirt?” Octavia says to Clarke after Lexa is out of earshot.

“What?” Clarke says with a shrug, “I thought you were the one that was trying to set us up.”

“Wasn’t just me,” Octavia mumbles but Clarke catches it.

“Oh, so you and Raven are in the match making business now,” Clarke teases.

“Who are you and Raven match making?” Lexa asks, walking back into the kitchen and setting the small first aid kit on the counter.

Clarke’s face instantly turns red and she turns her head, letting her blonde curls fall and act like a curtain, hiding her blushing from Lexa.

Octavia grins and answers, “Just two friends of ours that have had crushes on each other since before high school. They can both be pretty dense sometimes.”

“Oh,” Lexa says with a nod, flipping open the small box and digging through it. “Here you go,” she says as she produces a band aide and hands it to Clarke.

“Thanks,” Clarke mumbles as she reaches out to take it from Lexa. Her fingers close around part of Lexa’s hand and they lock eyes for a moment before quickly looking away from each other.

“Worse than high school,” Octavia mumbles but winces when Clarke wraps the band aide around the end of her finger.

“I heard that,” Clarke whispers as she smooths down the ends of the band aide.

Rolling her eyes Octavia sighs and says, “Hey Lexa, how about you show Clarke around the house? You now what rumors were like in high school. I’m sure Clarke would love to see how not accurate they were.”

Lexa perks up slightly and looks at Clarke, “Yea. I mean, if you want, I can show you around. Give you the tour,” she adds with a smile.

“Sounds great,” Clarke says with a lopsided smile of her own. “Try not to hurt yourself while I’m gone,” she adds to Octavia as her and Lexa head off down a hallway.

Octavia shakes her head but is smiling as she hears their voices fade down the hallway. She glances out the window again and sees the Raven talking with three other women, mothers Octavia assumes, but the blonde has her hand on Raven’s arm again and Octavia feels something in her stomach twist. She pushes away from the counter and heads back outside without knowing exactly what she plans to do.

The small group is laughing when Octavia arrives, stopping next to Raven opposite Bethany’s mom.

“Hey O,” Raven welcomes her with a smile, “I was just telling everyone about the climbing wall I’m going to make Cassie when we move out of the apartment.”

“I didn’t realize the two of you were house shopping,” Bethany’s mother says from her spot next to Raven.

“We’re not,” Octavia offers with a short nod, “Just daydreaming at this point. Though I’m pretty sure Raven already has plans drawn up,” she adds with a chuckle.

“It’s just a rough draft,” Raven admits with a small grin. “Anyway, I’ve been busy at work so I had to put those plans off just a little bit.”

“You work longer hours at the office than I think any of us do,” Bethany’s mother says. “It’s wonderful that you still have time to help Octavia out with Cassie so much.” The blonde woman levels a look at Octavia who just smiles back at her.

“It’s not like that,” Raven shakes her head. “We help each other,” she looks at Octavia and smiles and just for a moment Octavia is able to forget everyone else standing around them.

“Well, Raven,” the blonde says after a heartbeat, “you should come out some night with a few of us. We’re known to have a good time and you might enjoy it.”

Octavia feels her face flush and swears her blood is boiling listening to the tone in the other woman’s voice. There’s no denying what she’s implying or the wave of anger, no wait, jealously it causes to course through Octavia.

Before Octavia has a chance to say anything in response to the other woman Cassie comes running over, all giggles.

She wraps her arms around Raven’s legs, looks up at her and says, “Momma, up.”

Octavia feels herself stiffen at the words, fear grips her at what Raven’s reaction is going to be. Sure, they’ve spent most of the last few months together and while everyone teases them that they make a cute family, deep down Octavia has been thinking the same thing.

In the past two weeks she’d woken up more mornings beside Raven than without and she’d finally started to feel like she could sleep an entire night peacefully. Now, with just one innocent word, Octavia feared that their little bubble of happiness was about to pop, and she wasn’t sure how they could go back.

Raven crouches down and wraps her arms around Cassie, lifting the girl up and settling her on her hip.

“Qué voy a hacer contigo pequeña?” Raven smiles as Cassie nuzzles up against her. Octavia lets out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. She smiles at the two in front of her, her whole world in one spot, and her chest tightens. Tears start to form in her eyes and she’s instantly grateful that she’s wearing sunglasses so no one can see.

Octavia’s fears drain away and, in their place, she can almost see what a future with Raven would be like, much like what their lives have been the last few months. For a fleeting second, she wonders what it would be like.

“You ready to get to that cake?” Raven asks Cassie, interrupting Octavia’s thoughts and snapping her back to the present.

“Cake!” Cassie announces, throwing her hands up in the air in excitement.

Raven laughs at the girl’s excitement and looks at Octavia, the smile slipping off her face. Raven reaches over and lays a hand on Octavia’s waist, causing her to turn and look at Raven fully.

“You ok?” Raven asks her, a bit concerned. Octavia nods her head in response and Raven adds, “You look a little out of it.”

“I’m good,” Octavia manages a nod and small smile.

A few hours later, after the cake and presents, and after all of the guests had said their goodbyes, Octavia had just laid Cassie down for a long overdue nap.

Lexa had offered to let Octavia lay Cassie down in her room and the little one had been out the second her head hit the pillows. Octavia allows herself a moment to watch her daughter sleep, her now two year old daughter.

 _I can’t believe she’s two already_ , she thinks to herself with a sigh. _So much about my life has changed in those two years_.

“I can’t believe she lasted so long,” Raven’s voice comes from behind her and Octavia turns to see her leaning in the doorway, smiling.

“Pretty sure Clarke was sneaking her extra sugar all day,” Octavia answers smiling back. She takes a few steps until she’s standing in front of Raven. “Thank you, for all this. I never would have been able to pull something like this together.”

“You’re too hard on yourself,” Raven says in a low voice. “Besides, Mrs. Woods did most of this. I just asked and gave some input.”

“It was still your idea,” Octavia sighs and the smile slips from her face. “Inviting all the kids from the daycare was a good idea.”

“It was,” Raven agrees, “though some of those moms were a bit much at times.”

“You seemed to like Bethany’s mom,” Octavia mumbles, looking down at the floor, as they step out of Lexa’s room.

“Karen?” Raven asks lifting an eyebrow. “That woman was relentless. She never stops talking,” Raven adds with a chuckle.

“Probably because she was flirting the entire time,” the words fall out of Octavia’s mouth without a thought.

Raven chuckles again as they make their way into the currently empty living room. Lexa, along with Clarke, was sitting out by the pool. The two had been nearly inseparable since Octavia had recommended the house tour.

“Octavia Blake,” Raven says coming to a stop, “is that jealously I hear?”

“Jealous?” Octavia asks, trying to sound surprised, “Why on earth would I be jealous?”

“You’re jealous because Karen spent half the day flirting with me,” Raven says, trying and failing to keep from smiling.

“I’m not jealous,” Octavia insists. “If that’s who you want to flirt with, then it’s no business of mine.”

“Hang on O,” Raven says, reaching out and lightly cupping Octavia’s elbow. “I have zero interest in someone like Karen, and I told her that.”

“You did?” Octavia asks, looking up and meeting Raven’s eyes for just a moment before looking away again.

“Yup,” Raven says, popping the p. “After Cassie called me momma in front of everyone, Karen asked if we were dating.”

Octavia winces slightly, “About that, Cassie calling you mommy.”

“Momma,” Raven corrects with a smile.

“Right,” Octavia nods and sighs. “I’m sorry about that. I’ll talk to her about it tonight.”

“You don’t have to,” Raven starts then clamps her mouth shut. “It’s just, it didn’t bother me or anything. It was cute. We’ve been working on her vocab, both English and Spanish, and I guess she just got mixed up or something.” Raven shrugs, “She only did it twice.”

“Twice?” Octavia asks.

“Uh, yea,” Raven smiles a little sheepishly. “She did it in front of Lexa and Anya earlier.”

“I’m sure that was entertaining,” Octavia laughs.

“It was adorable,” Raven nods with a smile.

After her laughter subsides Octavia asks, “What did you tell Karen when she asked if we were dating?”

“Uh,” Raven mutters looking at the floor. “I told her we were not dating but that I’m not interested in dating right now.” Raven hesitates then adds, “I already know what I want, and that wasn’t it.”

“What do you want?” Octavia asks in a quiet voice, watching how nervous Raven seems to become.

“Is Cassie finally sleeping?” Clarke asks, walking into the room and startling both Octavia and Raven.

 _Great timing Clarke_ , Octavia curses her friend silently.

“Yep,” Raven nods, “out like a light. What are you two up to?” Raven asks as Lexa walks in behind Clarke, a smile pulling at her lips.

“We were going to go to Brews and Stews,” Lexa answers. “Chris is playing tonight and I thought real food would be nice.”

“Not wrong,” Octavia agrees with a nod.

“You two want to tag along?” Clarke asks with a sly grin. “You know, double date?”

“You’re such an ass,” Octavia rolls her eyes and playfully shoves Clarke’s shoulder. “I can’t just leave Cassie here.”

“You won’t have to,” Anya says walking into the room. “My two are asleep in my old room and I can keep an eye on her when she wakes up. The kids hit it off during the party.”

“I don’t know,” Octavia hesitates.

“Come on O,” Raven smiles, “I think we could all use some adult time after the party.”

Octavia hesitates briefly before biting her lip and nodding, “Alright. Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one took so long. Life has gotten a bit crazy. Going to try and get another chapter in before next week, I'm off to Vegas for my anniversary. Hope this was worth the wait!! Thank you guys for hanging in there with me. You're the best!!!!!!!!!!


	12. Day Sixty-Eight Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grown up time now that the birthday party is over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm excited about this chapter and I hope you all like reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!!!

“Hey, welcome back,” Amanda greets them at the door. “Table for,” she looks around and sees Clarke and Lexa, “four?”

“Yep,” Raven nods. “Brought the whole posse tonight.”

“Alright,” Amanda nods, “I’ve got a table towards the back with a clear view of the stage.” She leads them to the table and they all takes seats, Raven and Octavia on one side and Clarke and Lexa on the other. “Chris should be on in a few minutes.”

Amanda moves to walk away but Raven stands up and says, “Amanda, got a second?”

“Sure, anything for our favorite customer,” Amanda smiles and her and Raven walk towards the bar together.

“What’s that about?” Lexa asks, looking at Octavia, who only shrugs in response.

Octavia looks over her shoulder and watches as Raven and Amanda talking, Raven smiles wide at something and then heads back to the table. Octavia looks away as Raven drops back into the seat beside her, all smiles.

“It scares me when she smiles like that,” Lexa says with a smile.

“Ssshh,” Raven says to her, “It’ll be great.”

“You do like your surprises,” Octavia says with a smile, resting her head on her hand and leaning her elbow against the table.

“And yet you never seem to mind them,” Raven answers with a matching smile.

“How can I when my life has never been this interesting?” Octavia responds. She hears a snicker from across the table and looks over to see Lexa whispering something into Clarke’s ear, the blonde girl smiling widely in response.

“What?” Octavia asks, dropping her hand and leveling the two with a look.

“Nothing,” Clarke says trying to flatten her smile as Lexa moves away, a smile on her own face. “We’re just discussing who gets to plan the wedding.”

“Cute,” Raven says, shaking her head, “Very cute. Especially from the two that have had a crush on each other since high school but never got around to talking.”

Almost in unison Clarke and Lexa’s jaw drops and they look at each other.

“Guess you hadn’t told them that yet,” Raven says looking at Octavia with a smug smile.

“Nope,” Octavia answers, popping the p, “I was waiting for the right time.”

“Ah, well, now seemed like the right time,” Raven chuckles.

Amanda walks back up to the table and everyone places drink orders and Raven orders them an appetizer.

“So, you really had a crush on me in high school?” Lexa asks Clarke after Amanda had walked away.

“Well, yea,” Clarke says, almost as though it should have been obvious. “Kind of hard not to if we’re being honest here.”

“Because of my mom,” Lexa says and her face falls just a little. “Everyone loved talking about my mother back then.”

Clarke chuckles but shakes her head, “I couldn’t have cared less about your mother. It was you. You stood up for everyone, kept I don’t know how many freshman from getting their asses kicked every year.”

“She also thought you were hot,” Octavia adds with a grin. “She loved going to basketball games, and I know it had nothing to do with school spirit.”

“State the obvious,” Clarke says, rolling her eyes and throwing a straw wrapper at Octavia. “You weren’t any better. I think it was pretty clear why you always agreed to go with.”

“Good try,” Octavia says with a smug smile, “but I already told Raven I had a crush on her in high school.”

“Well hell,” Clarke says, looking between the two girls.

Their drinks arrive and the conversation turns more to small talk. Octavia and Raven sharing the occasional look when their friends flirted. By the time they’d been there two hours Clarke and Lexa had swapped phone numbers and were already planning an official date for the next evening.

The music from the front slows and comes to an end. Applause goes around the room and Chris smiles out at them all.

“Thank you,” he says into the microphone in front of him. “It’s been a great night and you all have been a wonderful crowd. Now, do we have any Train fans in the crowd tonight?”

“Whoo,” Octavia hoots, throwing her hands up. Raven does her best to keep a straight face, but a smile pulls at the corners of her lips.

“Well alright,” Chris smiles and sends a wink towards Raven. “What do you all think? Time for a duo?” Applause goes around the room again and Raven looks to Octavia, who is blushing. “Sounds like a yes to me.”

“I can’t,” Octavia whispers to Raven, leaning against her shoulder.

“You can,” Raven encourages. “You’re amazing Octavia. Just pretend you’re singing to Cassie and me.”

Octavia shakes her head but smiles and stands.

“Go O,” Clarke calls behind her, clapping.

“Did you have anything to do with this?” Lexa asks, looking at Raven, who just shrugs with a smile.

“Alright, welcome,” Chris says as Octavia arrives at the stage and he hands her a second microphone. “Why don’t you tell everyone your name.”

“I’m Octavia Blake,” Octavia says, speaking into the microphone with a smile and small wave.

“Well, Octavia,” Chris says with a smile, “as a Train fan I’m sure you know Bruises.”

“I do,” Octavia nods, looking at Raven with a smile that’s half fear and half excitement.

“Alright, here we go,” Chris says as he starts strumming his guitar. “Haven't seen you since high school, good to see you're still beautiful. Gravity hasn't started to pull quite yet, quite yet, I bet you're rich as hell.”

Octavia laughs but picks up, “One that's five and one that's three, been two years since he left me. Good to know that you got free, that town I know was keeping you down on your knees.”

Together, “These bruises make for better conversation, loses the vibe that separates. It's good to let you in again, You're not alone in how you've been. Everybody loses, we all got bruises. We all got bruises.”

They sing together, Octavia’s eyes finding Raven’s smile throughout, and as the song comes to an end Clarke jumps up to her feet, clapping.

“Now wasn’t that something?” Chris asks the crowd. “I had no idea we had such talent with us tonight.”

“Thank you,” Octavia nods her head in thanks and when Clarke whoops again she adds, “Thanks Clarke.”

“Thank you for joining me,” Chris smiles at Octavia, who smiles back. “How about another round of applause for Octavia Blake.” The noise in the room increases as the clapping ramps up again. Octavia waves nervously and hands the microphone back to Chris as she makes her way off the stage and back to their table.

“That was insane,” Octavia laughs as she slides back into her seat next to Raven, wrapping her hands Raven’s upper arm and leaning into her.

“You did great,” Raven responds with a huge smile.

“That was epic,” Clarke agrees, while Lexa smiles and nods.

“I forgot how much fun that could be,” Octavia beams, still leaning into Raven, “and Chris is amazing.”

“You should do it more often,” Raven nods. “I’m sure I could talk to Amanda or her dad.”

“You think they’d let me?” Octavia asks looking at Raven with a smile.

“After a performance like that,” Clarke pipes up, “They’d be fools not to.”

“She’s really amazing,” Lexa says a few minutes later, after Clarke and Octavia had gone to the bar to get more drinks.

“Yea, she really is,” Raven says in a breath as she watches the girls at the bar.

“Raven,” Lexa says in a serious voice, causing Raven to shift her gaze to her friend. “You should just tell Octavia how you feel.”

Raven lets out a sigh, “And if she’s not ready?” Lexa levels her with a look and Raven goes on, “She lost her husband. She might not be ready.”

“Raven,” Lexa says flatly, “anyone that sees the two of you together, well, let’s just say its obvious. She’s ready.”

Raven just nods, turning her head to see where Clarke and Octavia are, only to find Chris standing at the bar with them. He says something and the three laugh, Raven is about to shrug it off when she sees Chris lean close to Octavia and whispers something into her ear. Raven feels her pulse spike and clenches a fist under the table.

Octavia smiles but shakes her head, in turn saying something back to him. He nods and Clarke and Octavia head back to their table.

“Hey,” Octavia smiles as she sits beside Raven, placing her drink in front of her. “Chris asked me if I wanted to play something while he takes a break.”

“You say yes?” Raven asks, trying to shrug off what she’s guessing is the jealous she felt watching Chris get so close to Octavia.

“I did,” Octavia confirms with a nod as she leans back in the chair. “I’ve been practicing one and I want to give it a try.”

“That’s great,” Lexa smiles, widening her eyes slightly at Raven who gives a quick shake of her head.

“When are you up?” Raven asks.

“Now actually,” Octavia says as she takes a long sip from her drink and stands up again. “Wish me luck.”

“You don’t need it,” Raven smiles, “you’ll blow ‘em away.”

“Thanks,” Octavia says, leaning down and brushing a quick kiss on Raven’s cheek. She then turns and heads up to the stage.

“I’m going to take a real quick break,” Chris says into the microphone, “but Octavia is going to come up here and keep you entertained with a song while I do.”

There is clapping as Octavia steps back up onto the stage. Chris hands her his guitar and she slips the strap over her head. He reaches up and helps her adjust it, lightly touching her bare neck as he does. Raven isn’t sure if she’s imagining it or not, but it looks like he lets his touch linger just a little too long before he smiles at her and steps off the stage.

Octavia settles herself onto the bar stool Chris had been using and smiles out at everyone.

“Hi again,” she says with a smile to the crowd. “Some of you may know this one.”

“Five bucks says it’s a Train song,” Raven says to Clarke and Lexa with a smile. The second Octavia starts to play Raven’s smile drops in disbelief. Unlike most train songs, this one she knows well.

“One more day we'll spend together, lay your eyes, look up upon me for the better. Oh, I know I'm worse for weather, but my love, I won't give up. Spend my days cursing my soul, wishing I could paint my scars and make me whole. Oh, I know I could be better, but my love, I won't give up,” Octavia sings, her eyes finding Raven as she does.

“I ain't no superman, I ain't no holy ghost. I'm just the one that keeps you up and that you love the most. I'll be your strong man, I'll be your West Coast. I'll be the sun, I'll be the waves, I'll be the one you love the most. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, I’ll be your West Coast baby,” Octavia smiles and looks around the room when there’s the sound a clapping from the side.

Raven had never heard this song sung this way, but she had to admit, it is by far her favorite. Octavia seems to glow while on stage and Raven can’t take her eyes off of her.

“I'd change my ways if you would stay, and all your tears that you have cried will go away. Oh, just grant me one more day, oh, my love, please don't give up. See the devil at my door, I see the future of the ones that I've ignored. I guess I was born to be at war, but my love, I won't give up. So, my love, please don't give up,” Octavia’s eyes meet Raven’s and Raven gives her a smile and small nod. At the simple gesture Octavia’s smile seems to double and she strums out the chorus one last time.

“I ain't no superman, I ain't no holy ghost. I'm just the one that keeps you up and that you love the most. I'll be your strong man, I'll be your West Coast. I'll be the sun, I'll be the waves, I'll be the one you love the most. Ooh, ooh, I'll be your West Coast, honey,” Octavia strums the last few cords and the room explodes with clapping.

Clarke and Lexa come to their feet, clapping and cheering, Clarke louder than anyone else in the room. Raven rises a bit slower, feeling a bit like she’s in a daze. Octavia had not only learned the words to Raven’s favorite song, but also the music and had sung an amazing version of it.

“Thank you,” Octavia says to the crowd as she slides off the stool, lifting the guitar strap over her head as she does.

Chris jumps back up on stage, smiling wide as well, he reaches to help Octavia with the guitar strap, but she already has it off.

“Let’s have another round of applause,” Chris says into the microphone as Octavia waves to the room. “Beautiful and talented,” Chris adds and Raven watches as Octavia’s cheeks redden slightly as she makes her way off the stage.

Raven has to resist the urge to roll her eyes at his comment. Not that she disagreed, she knew firsthand had talented and beautiful Octavia is, but his flirting was starting to wear on her.

“That was amazing,” Clarke says, wrapping Octavia in a hug the moment she reaches their table. “If they don’t ask you to come back, they’re fools.”

**

They didn’t stay out much longer after Octavia’s performance and had all met back up at Lexa’s parents’ house. Octavia thanked Anya three times and even offered to pay for her having watched Cassie while they were out, all of which Anya turned down, saying it was her pleasure and that they need to set up play dates for the kids. They’d shared a light dinner and then the three had said their goodbyes and headed home.

“She’s out like a light,” Raven says as they step inside their apartment, Cassie in her arms, head pressed against Raven’s shoulder and sleeping soundly.

“Anya says she was awake half an hour after we left,” Octavia smiles at the pair as she closes the door behind them. “The kids played and ran Anya around the entire time we were gone. I feel bad.”

Raven chuckles quietly, not wanting to wake the small girl, “Don’t. Anya loves it and so does her mom. I’m going to put her in bed.”

Octavia kicks off her shoes and watches as Raven walks down the small hallway to their rooms, disappearing inside the door to the right.

To say it had been a roller coaster of a day would have been an understatement. It had warmed Octavia’s heart to see Cassie running around with so many other kids, having the time of her life. There hadn’t been enough of that in the girl’s life and Octavia was happy to see the girl making friends.

There had been that strange surge of jealous when she had seen Raven and Karen talking, Karen obviously flirting with Raven half the day had made Octavia’s blood boil and set her teeth on edge. Knowing that Raven had no interest had helped but that had gotten Octavia wondering what she was interested in.

Getting to sing in front of a crowd had been a thrill Octavia had never imagined and getting to watch the look in Raven’s eyes, well Octavia had been worried she’d forget to words or how to play. Instead the exact opposite had happened, she’d been filled with the confidence she needed.

She’d first listened to Raven’s favorite song the morning after they had talked about it and had listened to it countless times since then. Even finding the sheet music to it and teaching herself how to play it. She’d had to do it on evenings when Raven worked late or spent a few hours at Anya’s shop.

“She’s probably going to sleep all weekend,” Raven says with a smile, coming back into the living room. “Poor kid is beat.”

“She had an incredible day,” Octavia smiles back at her. “Thanks to you.”

“Thanks to a lot of people,” Raven counters. Neither of them sit down, Raven choosing to shove her hands in the back pockets of her jeans.

“I really wish you’d take credit every once and a while,” Octavia says with a shake of her head.

“I know absolutely nothing about planning a two year old’s birthday party,” Raven shrugs. “I asked Anya and her mom for a lot of help.”

“To be fair, I don’t think anyone knows what they’re doing with kids,” Octavia admits. “I know I pretty much make it up as I go.”

“You’re doing a great job,” Raven nods.

“So are you,” Octavia says, taking a small step forward. “I am sorry about the whole momma thing.”

Raven holds her hands up to stop her, “Don’t be.” She hesitates, leaning against the arm of the couch she adds, “I, um, never thought I’d have a kid in my life. Not after everything, so, I don’t know.” She shrugs and looks away, “I guess, it was kind of nice.”

Octavia sighs, “I just don’t want you to get the wrong idea, or to think that.” Octavia growls at herself, “I don’t know. I don’t want it to freak you out or anything. Or if you start dating someone, to freak them out.” Octavia doesn’t realize she’s rambling until Raven pushes herself away from the couch and comes to stand right in front of her.

“Hey, O, hey,” Raven says softly, taking Octavia’s hands. “O, look at me. It’s ok.”

Octavia takes a breath and raises her eyes to meet brown ones looking back at her.

“I’m not freaked out,” Raven says evenly. “I’m not. I love you guys, I love having you here and I’m not planning on going anywhere. If you’re worried about what happened this afternoon with Karen,” Raven says but stops when Octavia snorts a laugh at the name, causing Raven to smile.

“That was terrible,” Octavia laughs, reaching up to swat at a tear in the corner of her eye. “I don’t know when the last time was I saw someone flirt so shamelessly.”

Raven chuckles, “I can.” And when Octavia looks at her questioningly she adds, “Chris, tonight at the bar.”

“Chris was flirting?” Octavia asks surprised.

“Are you kidding?” Raven laughs. “The smiles, the jokes, helping you with the guitar strap.”

“Oh, kind of like Karen,” Octavia laughs back. “Putting her hands on your arm, telling you what a great job you’re doing with Cassie.”

“Yea, but I knew Karen was flirting with me,” Raven shakes her head with a smile. “You missed it by a mile.”

Octavia rolls her eyes, “It’s been a few years since anyone’s flirted with me. I’m a little rusty.”

“O,” Raven sighs. “I feel like you’ve been flirted with more than you realize. Like half the guys at work for starters.”

“What about the girls at work?” Octavia fires back. “They all know you’re out and they flirt with you every chance they get.”

“Well, I don’t want any of those girls,” Raven answers with a lopsided smile, “or Karen.”

“And I don’t want any of the guys at work,” Octavia replies, taking a step closer to Raven, hands on her hips and a playful smile on her face, “or Chris.”

“Alright,” Raven says, swallowing a sudden lump in her throat, “What do you want O?”

Something in the way Raven says it makes Octavia suddenly feel nervous and for a moment she can’t find the words she’s been dying to say for weeks now.

Octavia wets her suddenly dry lips and takes a slow deep breath, meeting Raven’s eyes she takes the final step, closing the gap between them and whispers, “I want you to shut up and kiss me.”

Raven’s smile widens, “Yea?”

“Yea,” Octavia nods, sliding her arms around Raven’s neck. She threads her fingers into Raven’s hair and slowly lowers her head. Raven’s hands find Octavia’s waist and any gap between them is closed as Raven pulls her closer.

When their lips are just a breath apart, Raven stops, hesitating.

“I want you too,” Raven whispers against Octavia’s lips, sending a chill down the shorter girl’s spine. With that Raven closes the last bit of distance and lightly places a kiss on Octavia’s lips.

Octavia’s reaction is instant, her arms tighten around Raven’s neck, lifting her up and deepening the kiss. Kissing Raven is nothing like kissing anyone else, Octavia feels it in every muscle in her body. As the kiss deepens Octavia feels like she’s breathing again for the first time in years and her hands slip from the back of Raven’s head to rest on Raven’s cheeks.

They break a part a few seconds later, both breathless, foreheads resting against each other.

“That took long enough,” Raven says with a smile, still trying to catch her breath.

Octavia shakes her head, smiling wide enough to make her cheeks hurt, “Shut up.” She close the gap between them again, capturing Raven’s lips and slowly starting to move them backwards.

When they reach the beginning of the small hallway Raven’s back bumps into the wall and they stop. Raven’s hands still rest on Octavia’s hips but she breaks the kiss, raising a hand to lay softly on Octavia’s cheek.

Raven swallows and asks in a quiet voice, “Are you sure you’re ready?”

Octavia, who’s hands rests lightly on Raven’s chest, bites her lips but meets Raven’s eyes. With a small nod she answers, “I’m ready.”

The smile returns to Raven’s face and she lower her head, lightly placing a kiss on Octavia’s lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it finally happened!!!!!!! I hope it was worth it for everyone stil reading this. Also, this is not the end of this story so stay tuned for more updates in the near future.  
> Side note: I leave for Vegas tomorrow to celebrate one year of marriage to my beautiful wife, so it may be a bit before there is another update, but there will be one. I promise you that!!!  
> Let me know what you all think and don't be afraid to stop in and say hi!!


	13. Day Sixty-Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after. Plus a little Clexa to make everyone's day and what would it be without big sister Anya?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this isn't the weekend and I'm a day late but here you have it.

Octavia couldn’t remember the last time she had slept so soundly, so peacefully, not a worry or thought on her mind. It would have had to have been over two years now, before life had gone so far off course, she thought she’d never manage a peacefully night’s sleep again. Before Cassie.

Octavia’s eyes snapped open at the thought of her daughter and for a moment she felt a pang of guilt that she had slept the night away without worrying about Cassie crawling out of her bed, as she often did.

There was a moment of disorientation as her eyes scanned around the room, realizing that she was not in her room like she had thought. No, she was in Raven’s room, and the night flooded back to her and she smiled.

I need to check on Cassie, Octavia thinks and as she starts to move, she realizes she can’t. Strong arms are wrapped around her, holding her tight. She can feel Raven’s warm breath on the back of her neck, warming her. As much as she’d like to never move from this spot, she knows she needs to check on Cassie, for all she knows the child has destroyed their apartment.

“Stop moving around,” Raven says in a muffled voice, “it’s too early to get up.”

Octavia smiles at Raven’s sleepy voice, “I need to check on Cassie.”

“Baby monitor,” Raven says as she nuzzles closer to Octavia, burying her nose in Octavia’s neck.

Octavia, surprised, glances up at the dresser beside the bed and sees the baby monitor they’d placed there months ago. Raven had decided to install a baby monitor, one that provided a video fed, and had multiple monitors around the apartment. So, we can keep an eye on her no matter where we are in the place, Raven had explained with a smile. While Octavia had appreciated it, she was sure that it had really just been another home project for Raven and Cassie to do n Raven’s day off.

Looking at it now, Octavia realized that it was in fact turned on, a video of a sleeping Cassie easily seen from here. She knew it hadn’t been when they had left the day before because they only left the monitors on in the rooms they were in, and they hadn’t been in Raven’s room for some time.

“When did you turn that on?” Octavia asks, turning her head to try and see the girl behind her.

“Last night,” Raven answers, no more awake now then she had been, “after. You were asleep.”

Octavia huffs out a short laugh, and rolls over so that she’s now facing Raven, “You’re amazing.”

“I know,” Raven smiles, her eyes still close as Octavia starts tracing her fingers over Raven’s bare collar bone.

“Are you going to keep your eyes closed?” Octavia asks as her fingers move from Raven’s collarbone to her shoulder.

“Mhmm,” Raven answers then after a moment, “If I open my eyes and this has all just been a dream I’m going to be so disappointed and messed up.” Raven’s voice catches just slightly and Octavia gently rests a hand on her cheek.

“Raven,” she says in barely a whisper. “It’s not a dream. Open your eyes, and I’ll still be here.”

Raven hesitates, taking a deep breath before she slowly opens her eyes. Octavia watches as Raven’s eyes slowly focus and lock with her own.

Octavia smiles, “See? I’m still here.”

Raven lifts her hand and lets it rest on Octavia’s hips, taking a deep breath, “I really thought that when I woke up, last night would have never happened.”

“Any regrets?” Octavia asks, dropping her hand onto Raven’s shoulder.

“Just that we should have done that sooner,” Raven says with a grin.

“That I can agree with,” Octavia says, leaning forward to kiss Raven. It was meant to be a short kiss but Raven’s grip on Octavia’s hip tightens, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss.

Before the kiss can turn into anything else a voice comes through the baby monitor on the dresser.

“Mommy,” Cassie calls, “Momma!”

Octavia can’t help but laugh, her lips still against Raven’s. “Of course,” she groans, “she has her aunt Clarke’s timing.”

Raven laughs but sits up, “That she does. I’ll go get her before she escapes.”

Octavia laughs harder when Raven leans forward, kissing her cheek and springs from the bed all in one movement. She grabs clothes and slips them on before opening the bedroom door and disappearing from sight.

Octavia bites her lower lip as she listens to Raven saying good morning to Cassie through the monitor. While Clarke may have joked about it the day before, they really had settled into a family routine.

That had been the easy part, almost from day one it seemed, but what happened now?

Definitely need to talk about what happened and what it all means, Octavia sighs as she lets herself flop back down onto her pillows. She lays there a moment before throwing back the blanket and grabbing a pair of sleep shorts and t-shirt out of Raven’s dresser.

It’s not that Octavia has regrets about anything, more like worries. That seemed to be something that had become very good at over the last few years, worrying.

Ever since high school there had been one thing to worry about after another. Getting married, moving around when Lincoln was stationed somewhere new, worrying about him while he was deployed. Then there had been worrying about the pregnancy, and how she was going to manage as a single parent, finding out that there was nothing she could do but move home and try and start over. She’s worried every day for as long as she can remember.

She lays back down on the bed with a heavy sigh.

That is, until last night. As she had drifted off to sleep, limbs heavy with exhaustion, her mind had been blissfully blank. She wasn’t worried about work, or her car breaking down, or what was going to happen tomorrow. She’d fallen asleep in Raven’s arms and had woken up to a new world.

Her thoughts get interrupted as the door to the room creaks open to reveal Raven, carrying Cassie on her hip, the two in the middle of a conversation Octavia couldn’t begin to understand.

“Qué debemos comer en el desayuno?” Raven asks, stepping through the doorway.

“Pastel!” Cassie answers, throwing her hands up in the air.

“No hay pastel para el desayuno, frijol tonto,” Raven laughs with a shake of her head as she reaches the bed.

Cassie looks down and sees Octavia on the bed, “Mamá,” she squeals and all but jumps from Raven’s arms and onto the bed. Luckily, Raven had a good hold and her and the fall was a controlled one, Cassie landing carefully on Octavia who laughs as the girl wraps her arms around her neck.

“We were just discussing breakfast,” Raven smiles as she sits down on the side of the bed.

“Oh, that’s what that was,” Octavia says as she sits up.

“What can I say?” Raven says with a shrug, “I think she speaks better Spanish than I do at this point.”

“I’m glad you taught her,” Octavia smiles, resting her hand on Raven’s arm.

“Well, I had to find a way we could talk about you without us knowing,” Raven smiles lopsidedly.

“Very cute,” Octavia says rolling her eyes. “So what is the plan for breakfast?”

“Cake!” Cassie exclaims from her spot on Octavia’s lap.

“Cake?” Octavia asks, looking down at her daughter, “That’s not going to happen kiddo. Besides, I think we left all the leftovers at Lexa’s house.”

Cassie gasps, covering her mouth with her hands, “No cake?”

Raven chuckles but says, “I’m sure we can stop over later and get some, but,” she leans down and places a soft kiss on Octavia’s lips, “I’m going to work on making us real food.”

Raven stands back up and heads to the door, stopping before she leaves. She looks back at Octavia and Cassie with a smile.

She quirks an eyebrow and asks, “Are those my clothes?”

Octavia looks down at herself then back at Raven with a shrug, “I needed something to wear. Do you mind?”

Raven’s smile widens and she shakes her head, “No, it actually looks really good. I like it.”

“Good,” Octavia says with a sly smile, “Get used to it.”

**

“So, do you think they did it?” Clarke asks. She was laying on the couch in Lexa’s bedroom, her head resting in Lexa’s lap.

Lexa snorts a laugh, “What do you think?”

Clarke is silent for a moment, Lexa glances down from her book, noticing the look on Clarke’s face. It was a mixture of concern and uncertainty, one that Lexa was sure has been on her face over the past few months.

“I think they both care about each other, way more than just as friends,” Clarke answers, then hesitates before adding, “I also know that Octavia has been through a lot in the last two years.”

“She has,” Lexa acknowledges as she sets her book down beside her. “And so has Raven.” Lexa sighs, “I think maybe that’s one of the reasons they’re so good together.”

“How do you mean?” Clarke asks, sitting up and looking at Lexa.

“They’ve both gone through hell and come out the other side,” Lexa explains. “They know what it’s like to have to be the strong ones, the ones that have to take care of things.”

“So, now they can take care of each other,” Clarke nods her agreement. “Assuming they ever figure out that they should be together.”

“Not everyone gets there as quickly,” Lexa smiles, reaching out and tucking some stray hair behind Clarke’s ear.

“You mean, not everyone sleeps together the first night they see each other after six years,” Clarke says with a sly smile.

“That too,” Lexa says, rolling her eyes. “We may have jumped in a little fast,” she admits with a sigh, “but I’d like to do the dating thing too.”

“Technically speaking we did have at least one date,” Clarke smiles at her, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Lexa’s lips, making the other girl smile. “Two dates if you count the birthday party,” Clarke continues when she pulls back.

“You’re going to count Cassie’s birthday party as a first date?” Lexa asks with a chuckle.

“Sure,” Clarke shrugs. “You did kiss me while you were showing me around the house.”

“You literally told me to!” Lexa laughs but before she can say anything else Clarke leans in and kisses her again.

Surprising Clarke, Lexa reaches up and pulls her down into her lap, making the blonde girl laugh as she does.

They’re still fooling around on the couch when Lexa hears the doorbell ring.

“Crap,” Lexa mutters as she kisses again, “Mom isn’t here so I need to get the door.”

“Don’t take too long,” Clarke says, kissing Lexa one more time as she gets up from the couch.

Lexa smiles the whole way to the front door, swinging it open without checking to see who it is first, a habit she almost always does.

“Lexa!” she’s greeted by a smiling Cassie, held in Octavia’s arms.

“Hi,” Lexa manages, clearly surprised as the small child leaps into her arms. “I did not expect you guys this afternoon.”

“We left the birthday cake here last night,” Raven explains as her and Octavia step inside. “Someone, has been asking for it all day.”

“Cake,” Cassie exclaims, throwing her arms up and wrapping them around Lexa.

“Ok,” Lexa laughs, “Mom put everything in the fridge after we went out.” She leads them into the kitchen and Cassie wiggles out of her arms and towards the play area Lexa’s mother kept for the grandkids.

“So, how’d things go with Clarke after we left last night?” Octavia asks, leaning against the kitchen counter.

“Um, well,” Lexa starts to stumble when Clarke comes walking around the corner.

“Clarke,” Octavia says, doing well to hide her own surprise.

“Hey,” Clarke says not sounding surprised at all, “didn’t expect to see you guys today.” She leans against the island with a smile.

“Could say the same about you,” Raven say, looking at Lexa with a barely contained smile.

“Shut up,” Lexa mumbles as he opens the fridge and pulls what’s left of the cake out, setting it on the counter.

“Blushing a bit there Lex,” Octavia teases with a smile.

“Ignore her,” Clarke says making a face at Octavia, “She’s just jealous because she didn’t get laid last night.”

A blush immediately springs to Raven’s cheeks and she quickly turns to cut pieces of cake while Octavia turns her eyes away from her friend.

“No,” Clarke says with a surprised smile, “You did. Finally!” Clarke cheers, walking over to Octavia and throwing her arms around her friend.

“Really Clarke,” Octavia mumbles.

“Well, yea,” Clarke says still smiling. “This is something to celebrate. It’s been how long?”

“Not helping Clarke,” Octavia grumbles to her friend wishing she could hide her embarrassment better. She wasn’t embarrassed about things having finally gone beyond friendship with Raven, it just wasn’t something she had been prepared to talk about this afternoon.

“It’s a good thing though,” Lexa smiles. “You two are dating now?”

“I mean, we haven’t really talked about it, at least not in detail,” Raven says with a shrug. She looks at Octavia, who gives her a reassuring smile and small nod. “But yea,” Raven nods with a smile, “we’re dating now. What about you two?” she lifts an eyebrow at her friend.

“We’re going out again tonight,” Clarke says so matter of fact that it even surprises Lexa, “so, yea, we’re dating too.”

A few hours later the group of them were all stretched out on the various furniture that made up the family room of Lexa’s mother’s house.

Clarke and Lexa were on the couch, Clarke once again laying with her head in Lexa’s lap as the other girl continued reading her book from earlier. Cassie had decided she was going to take her nap with her aunt Clarke and was currently passed out laying across Clarke’s chest.

Raven and Octavia had decided to take the lounge, which allowed them to lay side by side. Well, mostly, Octavia was half laying on Raven, with her arm thrown across Raven’s stomach and Raven’s arm resting on Octavia’s hip. Ever so often Raven was lean down just enough to place a gentle kiss on Octavia’s forehead.

“Well, isn’t this a scene,” Anya says from the entry way of the family room. Lexa turns and throws a glare at her older sister and Anya folds her arms over her chest and leans against the wall. “I feel like I need filled in,” she adds with a chuckle, The laugh is short lived as the sound of running resounds down the hallway followed a few seconds later by Anya’s children,

They smile wide when they see Lexa but when they also see Cassie they sprint towards her, and Clarke.

“Easy,” Clarke warns but Cassie has already started to stir and by the time the older two children reach her, Cassie’s eyes are opened, granted not by much.

“Hey Cassie,” Alex, Anya’s son, says with a smile, “Do you want to come play with us?”

The girl nods her head, rubbing her tired eyes, and slides off of Clarke. Alex takes her hand and the three kids toddle off towards the play area.

“I hope she doesn’t get grouchy,” Octavia says as she watches Cassie leave.

“I’m sure she’ll be fine,” Anya says letting herself plop down onto the only remain seat in the room. She looks between the two couples, chuckles and ask, “So, when did all this happen?”

“All what?” Lexa asks, sounding half annoyed.

“The couplish thing,” Anya replies, gesturing between the four of them, “As of yesterday, you,” she says pointing to her sister, “had zero interest in dating, and you,” she points at Raven, “were still in such denial it was starting to hurt me.”

“Anya,” Raven sighs as she sees Lexa blush, “you are the typical big sibling.”

“Thanks,” Anya says with a wide smile. “So, does this mean that when we go out I don’t have to watch these two me mopey anymore?”

“You were mopey?” Octavia asks, looking up at Raven with an amused smile.

“I was not,” Raven defends. “I just didn’t flirt like everyone else.”

“You’d sit at the table all night and barely drink,” Anya fires back, her grin growing.

“I was enjoying the music,” Raven says, throwing her hands up in the air.

“Right, mopey,” Anya smiles.

“You’re actually really cute when you’re embarrassed like that,” Octavia says with a smile.

“Don’t encourage her,” Raven says looking at Octavia with a growing smile. “She already forgets she’s not actually my big sister.”

“I’m wounded,” Anya says, placing her hand over her heart in mock pain.

“I’m going to wound you,” Raven says as she pulls a pillow out from behind her back and tosses it at Anya, who catches it easily.

**

A few hours later, after Lexa and Anya’s mother had come home and had decided to have a large family dinner, Raven unlocks the door to their apartment and steps inside, Octavia close behind her and carrying a sleeping Cassie.

“Two nights in a row,” Raven chuckles as she closes the door behind them. “She’s a champ.”

“She’s certainly not used to this,” Octavia smiles.

“We probably should cut down on the late nights,” Raven agrees with a nod as they walk into the living room.

“That’s not what I meant,” Octavia shakes her head, tuning to look at Raven. When Raven looks confused Octavia adds, “Let me go lay her down and I’ll be right back.”

Raven nods, still feeling confused, she walks over to the couch and lets herself fall onto it with a huff. Today had been good, a bit unexpected in some ways but still good overall. Raven has known Anya’s kids, literally their entire lives, but watching them interact with Cassie had shown her a whole new side to the kids.

Raven had watched as Alex, who was six, and his sister, who was five, had shown Cassie how to operate toys that were well above her age level, and they’d been patience the entire time. By the end of the day they’d had Cassie riding around in the little motorized car Anya’s mother had bought them a year ago.

Octavia sits down on the couch next to Raven, pulling her out of her thoughts. Without thinking Raven lifts her arm and Octavia settles into her side, resting her head on Raven’s shoulder and laying her arm across Raven’s stomach.

“Why did it take us so long to get here?” Raven asks after a moment. They’d settled into a comfortable position on the couch and Raven found herself suddenly fighting to keep her eyes open.

Octavia thinks a moment before saying, “Stubbornness and fear.”

Raven chuckles, “You’re probably right.” Raven rest her head back against the couch and pulls Octavia closer. With a happy sigh she leans over and kisses Octavia’s forehead, “So what is Cassie not used to?”

“All of this,” Octavia answers in a small voice. She sits up and looks back at Raven, “Until we moved here it had just been me and Cassie.” She sighs and adds, “I mean, she had some friends at daycare but other than that it was just the two of us. Not many people want to hang out with the widow after the funeral’s over.”

“O,” Raven says sitting up, “I didn’t even think about that. I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok,” Octavia says shaking her head slightly. “It’s a big part of the reason we came home. We didn’t have any family out there.”

Raven smiles, Well, I know for a fact that Mrs. Woods would not mind having all the kids around more often.”

“You think?” Octavia asks, raising an eyebrow in question. “I’d think after a few crazy days like today she’s want a break from the destruction.”

“Please,” Raven snorts a laugh. “They only knocked over one table and it was one we needed to put away from the party anyway.”

“Plus, they totally destroyed the playroom,” Octavia adds, “and they were all hyped up on sugar.”

“Which Anya’s mom gave them,” Raven laughs. “trust me, we could probably make it a weekly thing and she’d love it. All part of being in the family.”

Octavia shakes her head but laughs, “That’d be nice.” She sits back, cuddling up to Raven again who easily wraps an arm around her. “It’d be nice for Cassie to have other kids to grow up with. I was worried about her being an only child.”

“Give Mrs. Woods a few weeks and she’ll be all over Lexa about marriage and kids now that’s her and Clarke and trying the dating thing,” Raven chuckles then adds, “A few weeks and she may start bugging us about it too.”

Octavia can’t help the laugh that escapes her, “I haven’t even thought about either of those yet.”

Raven sighs, “Me either but we will.”

They’re both silent for a long time, laying together just on the edge of sleep. Raven thought that Octavia had fallen asleep until the shorter girl sits up.

Octavia turns around so that she’s facing Raven, a small smile on her face.

“What?” Raven asks with a matching smile.

“I love you Raven,” Octavia says, the smile still on her face but her voice is guarded just a bit, as though she’s afraid Raven might still reject her.

Raven sits forward, carefully cupping Octavia’s cheeks in her hands, and kisses her slowly.

When they pull apart a few seconds later, both smiling, Raven rests her forehead against Octavia’s and answers, “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys all enjoyed this chapter. As you may have noticed we have an end point and it is near. One more chapter to this fic and we're calling it a wrap. That said, it does not mean that I will never revisit this fic with an add-in here and there.


	14. Day Four Hundred and Twenty-Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here it is folks. Over a year since that fateful day when Octavia Blake walked into a coffee shop and life as she knew it changed forever.

“I can’t believe you’re making me help you move this thing again,” Lexa complains as she and Raven carry Cassie’s mattress down the stairs of Raven’s apartment building.

“At least this time we’re carrying it down the stairs,” Raven offers looking over her shoulder as she makes it to the bottom of the stairs.

“The only way that would have helped was if we just let it slide down the stairs,” Lexa smiles as they walk to her truck.

“That’s gross. Cassie sleeps on this,” Raven smirks, “Besides, we helped you and Clarke move into your apartment in January.”

“Well, as long as you and Octavia are done moving, I’ll be happy,” Lexa chuckles as they heft the mattress into the bed of the truck. They slide it in on its side, the only room left in the bed of the truck, the rest of the furniture that had made up Cassie’s room taking up the rest of the room.

“Considering we have a mortgage now,” Raven smiles as she hops up onto the tailgate, “I think it’s safe to say we’re not going anywhere for a while.”

“I still can’t believe you bought a house,” Lexa smiles as she joins her friend on the tailgate.

“That makes two of us,” Raven agrees with a nod and a smile. “Seems like we’ve both made some life changing decisions of late.”

“Yes, we have,” Lexa sighs. In the past few months Lexa had stopped working for her mother and had started her own non-profit organization geared towards helping single moms start over after leaving abusive spouses.

It hadn’t been easy and her mother had made it well known that she didn’t think Lexa was making the right decision but in the end she couldn’t deny that what Lexa had wanted to do was a good idea. Getting started up wasn’t easy and Lexa had been surprised to find that her mother had been there to help her figure it all out.

Not only did Lexa have the support of her mother, who decided that there’s was still the chance that her daughter would come back to her company someday, she had also had Clarke. From the outside they seemed like a strange pair. Clarke, the self-proclaimed ‘wild child’ of their group and Lexa, the reliable one.

Raven had to admit that she’d been a little surprised when their relationship had turned serious, but she had never seen Lexa happier or more supported.

Sometimes that’s how life works itself out though, Raven thinks with a smile. Seventeen year old her would never have imagined that in a few years she’d be with Octavia Blake. Actually her life had been going pretty much exactly how she’d expected it to go up until that day in the coffee shop. To say that Octavia and Cassie had turned things on their head would have been an understatement.

Raven had to admit, her life had gone through similar changes. While she did still work for Mrs. Woods, her time spent in the office had drastically decreased. She was now more of a part time consultant when the company needed it. A few months after she and Octavia had started dating, Raven had finally taken Anya up on her offer and had started working at the garage full time.

Octavia still worked in the office but Cassie’s time in daycare had shrunk to almost nothing at all. Cassie spent most days at the shop with Raven, her time split between playing with Anya’s kids and watching Raven work. Raven had even gone out and bought Cassie her own little coveralls so she’d feel included.

Things had been going so well actually that Anya had mentioned the idea of being partners in the business and even the idea of opening a second shop someday.

“Only one really big change left to do,” Raven says as her smile grows. Lexa gives her a confused look and she reaches inside her pocket, pulling out a small box.

“No way,” Lexa says in awe as she takes the box from Raven, “you’re finally going to do it?”

“Yep,” Raven pops the p as she swings her leg. “I’ve actually had it for three months.”

“What the hell?” Lexa asks as she cracks open the ring box to look inside. “What are you waiting for?”

“The right moment,” Raven says with a sigh. “She’s been through so much and, I know she’s nervous about the idea of getting married again. I just want to make sure she’s ready.”

“You my friend,” Lexa says as she jumps down from the tailgate, “have no idea.”

Raven thinks for a minute then, with a smile says, “I need you to help me with something.”

**

“I thought you were supposed to be helping,” Octavia chuckles as she walks into their new living room to see Clarke laying across their couch.

“I am,” Clarke says, her voice slightly muffled by the couch cushion pressed against her face.

“You were,” Octavia sighs as she flops herself down over Clarke’s legs, “now you’ve face planted into my couch.”

“You know, for someone that loos so little, you weigh a lot,” Clarke complains, turning her head to the side.

“You’re an ass,” Octavia says but laughs. “Why are we friends?”

“Because you love me,” Clarke answers with a smile. “Though I’m clearly no long number one.”

“Very cute,” Octavia sighs as she reaches down and pinches Clarke’s leg. The laugh and Octavia gives herself a moment to look around the room. It was still piled high with boxes and random pieces of furniture.

“I still can’t believe you bought a house,” Clarke says after a moment, echoing Octavia’s thoughts. “It’s like we’re all grown-ups now.”

“Yea, my three year old daughter might agree with you,” Octavia says with a chuckle. “But yea, it is kind of weird isn’t it?”

Clarke chuckles, “What’s weird is that Raven hasn’t asked you to marry her yet.”

“I think she’s worried,” Octavia says with a sigh.

“About what?” Clarke asks as she rolls over to lay on her back, pushing Octavia off her just long enough to move. “You two are clearly meant to be.”

“I know,” Octavia says as Clarke slides her legs out form under her and sits up. “I think she’s worried I’ll say no or that I’m not ready.”

“Are you?” Clarke asks, lifting an eyebrow in question.

Octavia bites her lip and looks down at her hands in her lap before nodding, “After Lincoln died, I thought that was it. That was my happy ending and I missed it and it was just going to be me and Cassie for then on. I never thought I’d meet someone that could make me feel like that again.”

Clarke lays a hand on Octavia’s leg in support and says, “To be fair, you didn’t meet someone new. You’d already met Raven.”

Octavia laughs and looks over at Clarke, a few small tears in her eyes, “You’re an ass but you’re right I guess.”

“I’m always right,” Clarke says, bumping shoulders with her friend, “and maybe it was all about timing.”

“Kind of like you and Lexa?” Octavia asks with a smile and chuckles when she sees Clarke’s cheeks brighten with color.

“Yea,” she nods. “It’s been really great. I’m not thinking the marriage thing like you two, but yea, it’s good.”

“Not yet,” Octavia teases as she stands up. “Give it time and before you know it Cassie will have even more kids to play with.”

“Oh god,” Clarke says, covering her face with her hands, “Can we not go there yet?”

Octavia laughs and reaches down, taking Clarke’s hands and hauling her off the couch, “Come on. I need help putting our bed together.”

“How is that my job?” Clarke complains but allows herself to be brought to her feet.

“Because my girlfriend and yours are brining the last load of stuff here,” Octavia explains as they head up the stairs.

Octavia loved the fact that they had a second story to their house. She hadn’t lived in a two story house since before she had finished high school and had lived with her mother still.

“Why did you guys have to buy such a big place?” Clarke complains as they reach the top of the stairs. “Did you really need four bedrooms?”

“Yep,” Octavia says, popping the p, “In a few years Raven and I want to start fostering kids.”

“Wow,” Clarke shakes her head but smiles. “You two really are going for the perfect couple thing huh?”

Octavia answers with a chuckle, “Not even close. It’s something that’s important to Raven, after everything she went though, and I agree.”

“Yea,” Clarke nods as they walk into the master bedroom, “I can see that.”

They spend the next half hour trying to figure out which bolts go to which parts of the bed frame before they hear the front door open.

“Babe, we’re back,” Octavia hears Raven call from downstairs and the smile that springs to her face is automatic. “And we stopped and got some help.”

“Mommy!” she hears Cassie calling from below and stands up.

“Come on Clarke,” Octavia says, offering a hand to her friend still sitting cross legged on the floor, “the boss is home.”

Clarke takes the offered hand and lets Octavia pull her to her feet, “Which one is the boss?”

“Like you really have to asks,” Octavia laughs as they head down the stairs.

They reach the bottom of the steps and Cassie squeals, “Aunt Clarke,” running straight at the blonde.

“I see where I rate,” Octavia asks as Clarke picks up the giggling girl.

“You’re still number one with me,” Raven smiles as she wraps her arms around Octavia’s waist, pulling her close and kissing her lightly.

“Ok, not in front of the kid,” Clarke laughs.

“I’ll remember that,” Octavia grins at her friend, who rolls her eyes in return.

“I have some good news,” Raven announces, her arm still around Octavia.

“What’s that?” Octavia asks.

“Last load from the apartment is in the truck,” Raven smiles.

“So, that’s it?” Octavia asks with a smile, “We’re all moved?”

“All moved,” Raven confirms with a nod.

A few hours later they all sit on the floor in the living room, pizza boxes spread out around them, as they enjoyed their first official meal in their new house.

“Guess first thing tomorrow I should put the dining room table together,” Raven observes as she looks around the room.

“Isn’t it some kind of tradition to eat your first meal on the floor anyway?” Clarke asks, taking a bite of her pizza.

“Just because neither one of you two had a dining room table when you moved into your apartment doesn’t make it tradition,” Octavia chuckles.

“Hey, I went out and bought one,” Lexa counters.

“Yea and waited three weeks for me to come over and put it together,” Raven counters back with a laugh.

“Isn’t that the plus to having a friend that’s an engineer?” Lexa asks playfully.

“Very cute,” Raven sticker her tongue out.

“And very mature,” Lexa counters.

“Somedays I think Cassie is more grown up than any of us,” Octavia says with a smile and a sigh.

“Yes,” Raven says as she stretches out on the floor, her head resting in Octavia’s lap, “but we did convince her that we bought the house for her birthday.”

“Yes we did,” Octavia smiles as she starts to run her fingers through Raven’s hair. She looks over at Cassie, who feel asleep in Lexa’s lap. Despite Lexa saying she wasn’t good with kids, Cassie had taken a liking to the older girl. “She asked me earlier if that means it’s the house’s birthday too.”

“Oh great,” Raven laughs, “Now we’re going to have to buy two cakes, one for Cassie and one for the house.”

“Hey, you can never have too much cake,” Clarke speaks up from her spot next to Lexa.

“You would say that,” Octavia chuckles then looks down at Raven with a smile. “What were you and Lexa working on out back before dinner?”

“Just a little surprise,” Raven answers with a smile. An hour before they had decided to order dinner Raven had kidnapped Lexa, saying there was a project in the back yard she needed help with. She’d also told Clarke to make sure Octavia stayed in the house.

It was strange to have a back yard again after living in the apartment for so many years, but Raven intended to make good use of it.

When they had first looked at the house the back yard was one of the biggest selling points. That night, before they had even put an offer in on the house, Raven had sat down and drawn up plans to expand the already there deck, which included adding a fire pit and out door cooking area. She’d also drawn up plans for a play area for Cassie and, eventually, a pool. The yard allowed for all that and more.

Octavia looks across the room at Lexa, who wears a sly smile of her own.

“You two,” Octavia says with a smile.

“What do you think?” Raven asks, turning her head to look at Lexa.

“We’ve got Cassie,” Lexa answers with a nod.

Clarke gives her a confused look but Lexa simply shrugs in response causing Clarke to roll her eyes.

Raven nods and comes to her feet so fast that Octavia gets dizzy just watching her. With a smile Raven turns and offer Octavia her hand.

Octavia hesitates for the briefest of moments before she reaches up and takes her hand, letting Raven pull her to her feet.

“You know I’m not a big fan of surprises,” Octavia says as they make their way though the dining room and into the kitchen, heading towards the sliding back door that lead to their back yard.

“I know, but you’re going to like this one,” Raven promises as she slides the door open.

They step out into the dark yard, Octavia just able to make out that there is something in the yard, not far from the deck they now stand on.

“What’s that?” she asks Raven, the other girl’s smile bright in the dark night.

“One second,” Raven says, kissing Octavia’s cheek quickly before taking a few steps away.

“Raven,” Octavia starts to object but stops when suddenly the back yard lights up. The object that Octavia had seen turns out to be a playset, complete with its own little climbing wall. Lights had been strung from the top of the playset to the corners of the deck. Light fairy lights tinkle between them making it look like a starry sky.

“Raven,” Octavia says again, this time her voice nearly a whisper. Strong arms wrap themselves around her waist and Octavia leans back against Raven, who places her chin on Octavia’s shoulder.

“You know before you and Cassie showed up, I was perfectly content with living the way I was,” Raven says in a soft voice. “I thought I was happy just going to work and coming home, maybe spending a little time in the shop. That was all I thought I needed.”

Raven stops and Octavia turns in her arms, looping her own arms around Raven’s neck. She watches as the taller girl swallow hard, like she does when she’s nervous, and she waits, knowing that whatever Raven wants to say is important.

“I know we’ve kind of done things out of order,” Raven smiles slightly. “You’re supposed to get married, buy a house then have a kid, but we never would have gotten here any other way.”

Octavia plays with the lose hairs at the back of Raven’s neck as she talks and is surprised when Raven releases her hold on her and takes a step back.

Raven reaches into her pocket and pulls out a small box. Octavia feels her eyes water instantly and Raven says, “I know tradition says I’m supposed to get down on one knee,” she chuckles slightly, “but if I do that there’s a chance, I won’t get back up.”

Despite her tears Octavia chuckles at that, covering her mouth with her hands at the sound.

“I don’t really know what’s going to come next for us,” Raven continues, her voice breaking for a moment, “but what I do know if that whatever it is, we can handle it as long as we’re together.” Raven cracks open the box to reveal a ring.

A princess cut ruby sits centered on a gold band. A ruby, Cassie’s birthstone.

“Will you marry me?” Raven asks, her voice thick with emotions and her hands shaking ever so slightly as she holds the box.

Octavia nods her head, tears streaming down her face and over her hands, still clasped over her mouth.

“Yes,” she manages to says, dropping her hands from her face, still nodding.

“Yea?” Raven asks back, smiling as though she couldn’t believe Octavia had said yes.

“Yes,” Octavia says again this time with a huge smile and she throws her arms around Raven’s neck again, pulling her down and into a kiss.

Raven wraps her free arm around Octavia, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss.

“I love you,” Raven says a moment later, when they break apart.

“I love you too,” Octavia smiles, a smile like she never thought she would smile again, as Raven slips the ring onto her finger.

**

A few hours later, after Clarke and Lexa had said they’re goodbyes and promised to be back tomorrow to finish helping with the unpacking, everyone was upstairs in the master bedroom.

Raven laid with her head on Octavia’s shoulder, an arm laid across Octavia’s waist. Cassie was fast asleep, curled up against Raven’s side and half laying on Octavia.

They had planned on setting up Cassie’s bed tonight but they’d been too tired to get to it so Raven had carried Cassie up to their room and it wasn’t long after they had laid down that Octavia had heard Raven’s breath even out.

While Octavia had felt exhausted after the long day of moving, and after the surprise of Raven’s proposal had faded, she found herself unable to fall asleep so quickly.

Instead she laid there, listening to the sound of her two girls sleeping and absentmindedly running her fingers through Raven’s hair.

She thought of all the times in high school she had thought of just walking up to Raven, of starting a conversation with her, and of all the times she had decided not to. The reasons all seemed so silly now, now that she had gotten to know and love her so well.

She thought of what life had been like after high school, her marriage to Lincoln and all the good years spent with him. Of the pain of losing him and fear that her life would never feel whole again. She couldn’t say for sure that there would ever come a day where she didn’t still miss him, but her heart felt less heavy now.

While there were still many things that Octavia feared and worried about there were many more things that she was certain of.

She was certain that, while raising a daughter would never be easy, she would never have to do it alone again. She was certain that for the rest of her life she would get to sleep next to Raven and wake up ever morning to her smile and strong arms.

The number of things that were both certain and uncertain were, in many ways, countless but Octavia looked at the future now with a hope she hadn’t dreamed of in what felt like a long time.

She knew that, no matter what, she and Raven would get things right, this time around.

 

                                                                                                                                                -The End-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is. I hope that everyone enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. You all have been amazing and your support throughout has encouraged me so much. I hope you guys stick around and see what else I manage. This has all been possible because of all of you!! 
> 
> Thank you guys so much!!!!!


End file.
